The Lord's Plan
by Jamie Sommers
Summary: Written with kf6tac. A story written in both Landon and Jamie's POV about their relationship. Starts the day after their first date.
1. School Daze

The Lord's Plan 

By:  kf6tac (Brian) and Jamie Sommers

Email: kf6tac@yahoo.com

          Jamiesommers23@hotmail.com

Rated: PG-13

Synopsis:  This story is about Landon and Jamie's budding relationship.  They've had their first date; Landon has told her he loves her, now they have to face their friends, their family and their own fears.  Written from both Landon (**written in bold print by kf6tac/Brian**) and Jamie's (_written in italic print by Jamie Sommers_) POV.

Chapter 1:  School Daze 

**I stood at the door, shaking--awaiting my fate.  He gave me permission to take her out to dinner, but he didn't give me permission to fall in love with her.  I rang the bell and he opened it before I could take my finger off the button.  **

"Good mornin' Mr. Carter.  What brings you to my house so early on a Monday morning?"

**"I…uh…I'm here to pick up Jamie for school, Sir."  I swallowed that huge lump in my throat and prayed that he wouldn't kick me off of his porch.**

"Well…" He scratched his jaw and looked me up and down.  Talk about nervous--I was pretty sure he could see me sweating, but I stood my ground and waited for Jamie.  Then she walked up beside her father and my heart stopped.  

**She didn't look any different then she did any other morning she went to school.  Her hair was in a ponytail, she was wearing a plain skirt and shirt, and of course, her sweater, but for some reason she looked just as beautiful to me as the night of the play.  Gorgeous.  I don't really know when I began noticing little things about her.  The way her hair felt like silk, her skin was flawless, the way her eyes sparkled… Jamie Sullivan was the most beautiful woman in the world and she was mine.**

I was so nervous.  I didn't tell daddy about Landon picking me up for school that day.  I thought I would just take my chances and see how he reacted.  It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.  He told me that no one was allowed in the house if he wasn't home and that he expected me home from school at the usual time.  He did give Landon one of those looks that can make a person squirm though.  It was like a warning--not for what he did, but for what he MIGHT do.  Poor Landon. He just stood there and kept swallowing over and over again.  He was so cute.  

The first time I thought about him like that was that morning in church after that incident with Clay.  He was sitting there with this huge white bandage on his forehead and he looked so…lost…angry.  Everyone judged him.  He was the reason Clay was in the hospital, but no one thought about the other kids, the one's that didn't hang around to make sure Clay wasn't dead.  Landon was the only one.  He made everyone else leave so they wouldn't get in trouble and he took all the blame himself.  Sure he lied about what happened, but to be fair, so did Clay.  No one stopped to think that Clay would've still felt peer pressure--he still would've jumped.  The only difference is, if Landon weren't there, then there would've been no one to pull Clay out of the water.  Clay would've still jumped, he still would've gotten hurt and the rest of his friends still would've run...they DID run. Landon didn't almost kill Clay that day--he saved him.  So, that was the day I noticed that his eyes were troubled…and beautiful.  I bet they sparkled when he smiled.

**She held my hand on the drive to school and chatted about classes and church and anything else you could think of but the minute we pulled into the school's parking lot she was quiet.  **

**"Hey?  You okay?"  I asked her.  **

**"Yeah.  I'm just…Landon?  Are you sure you're ready for this?"**

**"For what?"  I honestly didn't know what she was talking about.**

**"The minute we walk across that campus everyone is going to know about us."  **

**"Good."  I kissed her then, just to let her know that I was more than sure.  For the first time in my life, I didn't care what people thought about me and it was pretty cool.  **

He opened the car door for me and held onto both of my hands.  I was right you know--his eyes do sparkle when he smiles.  He gave me a quick kiss and then we headed towards the school.  We didn't say anything to each other; we just held hands and walked.  I was nervous, shaking almost.  I knew we'd be walking right by the spot that Landon and his friends hung out at before, during and after school, only this time, Landon was with me, not them.  I glanced at him, I wanted to see how he reacted when we saw his group of friends from where we were, but he didn't seem to notice them.  He just held my hand and walked me into the building like he'd done it everyday of his life.  We could hear them saying things about us; hear their reactions, but neither one of us cared.  If they didn't want to accept us, then they didn't have to.  We were happy with or without them.  

We went to his locker first--it was on the way to mine--then he walked me to my first class.  We got a lot of curious looks in the hallways and I was a little worried about him changing his mind.  What if the pressures of being my boyfriend got to him?  It's not like I'm popular or anything and well…he was.  There's not a girl in this whole school that wouldn't want to be in my position--holding his hand--then I felt him squeeze it, like he was reading my mind and he was saying 'everything'll be all right.'   When we got to my first class he…I still can't believe he did this, but…he kissed me.  In front of everyone!  He leaned over and kissed me and said, 'wait here for me and we can walk to science together, 'kay?'  I literally floated into psyche that morning.  Landon Carter loved me and the best part was that he wasn't ashamed to show it. 

**It's kind of funny, usually when people stare and wonder it's an uncomfortable situation.  It definitely was when I walked onto campus--with the assistance of crutches--after that whole mess with Clay.  This time though, it was the greatest feeling in the world.  Not that people stared, but because I knew I had nothing to be ashamed of.  I didn't even notice the others much.  It's like everything in the world just melts away when I'm with Jamie.**

**At first I thought it would be awkward walking by Dean and the old gang.  But as it turns out, it wasn't bad at all.  Oh sure, Tracy and Belinda said things about us behind our backs and Dean… well… he's just Dean.  I'm sure he probably said some not-so-appropriate words under his breath too.  But it didn't matter.  If they wanted to be friends with me, they'd have to accept my decisions and the people I love.  Otherwise Landon Carter would be just as happy without them.  I had Jamie with me, and that's all that mattered.**

**As we walked through the halls to our lockers, people kind of parted.  They didn't all crowd to the walls, but they definitely spread out more than they would have for just any other couple walking down the hallway.  When we got to Jamie's psyche class, I kissed her and told her to wait up for me after the first period.  Yeah, I kissed her.  Not because I had anything to prove, just because I love her.  I would have told her that, but I wasn't sure she was ready to hear it again just yet.  That thought made me a little nervous, but she had let me hold her hand and kiss her in front of the whole school.  I wasn't going to rush her--to be perfectly honest--I was in Heaven anyways.  I watched as Jamie walked into her classroom, and when I turned around I saw Principal Kelly watching me from across the hall.  I couldn't help but smile--for once the principal was staring at me like he had no clue what was up, just like all the other kids in the hall.  I just smiled at him and shrugged as I walked off to trig.  Maybe, someday, I'll thank him for making me do that play after all.**

I waited after class for him. I felt a little awkward at first, but then Eddie Zimmerhoff came up to me and started talking to me--I'm not really sure about what though, because that's when I saw him coming towards me. My hands started sweating, my heart started racing and then he was there, right in front of me. He slipped his arm around my waist and kissed my cheek.

"Hey," he looked at Eddie and said, "Hey man. What's up?"

"Ummm. Nothing." Eddie looked like he swallowed a frog. "What's up with you?" He looked like he was going to smile, but he just wasn't quite sure if he should or not.

"Not much." Landon looked at me and said, "You ready?"

I nodded my head, I don't know why, but I just couldn't speak. He grabbed my hand and walked me to my locker than we headed off to science class.

I know trigonometry is almost always a boring class since Mr. Evans just sits up there at his overhead projector and rambles on in monotone, but that hour today felt like at least three hours. I just kept staring at that clock, waiting and waiting for the bell to ring. Everything Mr. Evans was saying about sines, cosines, and whatever else just drifted by me. And when the bell finally rang, I think I was the first one out of that door.

When I got to the door of Jamie's classroom, she was there waiting for me. Even though she wasn't really wearing or doing anything unusual, my heart still jumped when I saw her. 'Cool it, Landon,' I told myself. 'Now is not a good time to do anything dumb.' Anyways, I tried to stay as calm as I could and I walked up to Jamie and kissed her on the cheek. That's when I noticed Eddie Zimmerhoff standing there. I guess he'd been talking to Jamie before I showed up. I grinned, and said hi to him too.  I didn't have anything against the guy, even if his play was a bit… well… corny.  I think I might've caught him a bit off guard with kissing Jamie and all but that wasn't something new… not today at least.

I have to admit, I was a little paranoid about class considering Dean was assigned to sit next to me at the beginning of the year. He showed up 10 minutes late for class that first day and the only seat left was next to me. It didn't bother me that he didn't want to sit there.  I really didn't care. To be honest I would've rather sat by myself, but...I think God's plan was already in motion.

Landon and I were one of the last people to walk into class--he never let go of my hand--Mr. Gilbert looked up at the clock then did a double take at us and smiled. I wasn't at all shocked when Landon pulled out my chair, but I was pleasantly surprised when he took the seat next to me --Dean's seat--instead of his usual one next to Belinda.

We took our time getting to science class, just walking down the halls at a leisurely pace. The last thing I wanted to think about was cells and chemicals anyways. It just felt really good having Jamie there next to me, her hand in mine. But a passing period is only so long. We got into class just before the bell, so we weren't late--technically, at least. We were the last ones in though, besides for Dean and Belinda. I don't think anyone really expected Dean to come into class on time anymore, seeing as how he was ten minutes late the very first day. As luck would have it though, that's how he got a seat next to Jamie. I figured Jamie was probably a little bit nervous about sitting next to Dean. I mean, Jamie isn't the type to pick a fight with anyone, but Dean's a pretty big guy. Thinking back now, I might've been really asking for it when I punched him last week in the cafeteria. And it's hard enough for Jamie that he didn't really like her to start with. After I pulled Jamie's chair out for her, I sat down right next to her in Dean's seat. I looked over at Mr. Gilbert to see if he was going to tell me to get back to my seat in the corner of the room by Belinda, but he seemed to be cool with it.

The bell rang, and Mr. Gilbert started drawing some diagrams up on the chalkboard. As I leaned over to get my notebook out of my bag, I saw Belinda and Dean coming down the hall toward the door. 'Moment of truth,' I thought to myself.

They weren't there yet, but they were coming, they usually showed up late for...well for every class that I can think of. I got my binder out of my backpack and I could feel Landon stiffen next to me--they were here. I really didn't think Dean would do anything. I figured he'd just glance over and see Landon sitting next to me and just take the seat next to Belinda. After that incident in the cafeteria last week, you'd think I would know better.   

"Yo," he looked at me with such hatred. "I think you're in my seat man." 

Landon just shook his head and said, "I didn't really think you would mind."   

"Well, maybe I do." 

I knew Landon was trying to keep calm, he licked his lips and just exhaled through his nose, I was so scared that he was going to get into another fight with Dean over me, so I put my hand on his leg and shook my head. Thank goodness Mr. Gilbert interrupted.

"Is there a problem Landon? Dean?"

"No sir..."

"Yeah," Dean interrupted, "as a matter of fact there is. Landon's in my seat."

"Well there seems to be an empty chair over in the corner...why don't you take that seat?"

**I looked down at my notebook and pretended to be copying down Mr. Gilbert's diagrams, but I didn't think my little ploy would fool anyone. To be honest, I was doing everything I could to sit still. I wasn't really sure what Dean and Belinda would say to my changing of seats. I kinda hoped to myself that they would be cool about it and not make a big scene, but things just haven't gone my way lately with them.   **

**Dean walked up to me, his backpack strap twisted around his arm like usual. I heard the bag drop to the floor with a loud "thud", and Dean stood there in front of the desk.  **

**"Yo," he said, casting a glare at Jamie before turning back to me. **

**I could hear the irritation in his voice. "I think you're in my seat man." As if it weren't obvious to start with.**

**Part of me wanted to just hit him again, yet another part of me wished he would just go away. I was lucky no teachers were around last week in the cafeteria to bust me. I wasn't so lucky this time, and I really couldn't afford to get in trouble this close to graduation. **

**"I didn't really think you would mind," I told him, trying to hide my own agitation and nervousness.**

**"Well, maybe I do."**

**'Go away Dean, just sit down and get over it,' I kept wishing in my head. I was pretty sure the entire class was staring, and this was one of those bad stares.**

**Mr. Gilbert jumped in just at the nick of time, and even though Dean protested he was told to go sit in my old seat. I let out a long breath, glad to have been pulled out of that situation. A few seconds more and I don't know what I would have done. I was already starting to break a sweat. Mr. Gilbert went back to the board, and I tried to calm myself down enough to finish--well, start actually--my notes.  **

On the way out of class that day Mr. Gilbert asked Landon and I to stay after. I've been going to school here for four years and I've never had to stay after class for anything...ever. 

"You wanted to see us, Mr. Gilbert?" I squeezed Landon's hand. I think he knew I was a little nervous.

"Yes, Miss. Sullivan. I just wanted to let you both know that I really enjoyed your performances in the spring play." He looked down at our joined hands and smiled at us again, "Congratulations."  

I wonder if there was a hidden meaning in his 'congratulations?'

**As Jamie and I were walking out the door, Mr. Gilbert asked us to stay after. I kicked myself for my little stunt with the seat switching. It's not that staying after class was anything new to me, but I didn't mean to drag Jamie into it. She hadn't gotten in trouble her whole time at this school, and I felt terrible for being the one to ruin that track record for her.**

**I was really relieved to find out that Mr. Gilbert wasn't going to write us up. As it turns out, he didn't even talk to us about the seats. He had just wanted to tell us that he liked the play and to congratulate us.**

**When we got outside into the hallway, I turned to Jamie and gave her another quick kiss.**

**"Hey, sorry about that mess in there. I just really wanted to sit next to you, that's all. And I didn't think you'd want to be dealing with Dean today."**

**"It's alright Landon.  We didn't actually get in trouble, and it was nice to get a compliment from Mr. Gilbert too."**

**"Yeah," I said with a chuckle. "So…. We've got ourselves a ten-minute break here. What do you want to do with it?"**

  



	2. Absence Of Class

The Lord's Plan 

By:  kf6tac (Brian) and Jamie Sommers

Email: kf6tac@yahoo.com

          Jamiesommers23@hotmail.com

Rated: PG-13

Synopsis:  This story is about Landon and Jamie's budding relationship.  They've had their first date; Landon has told her he loves her, now they have to face their friends, their family and their own fears.  Written from both Landon (**written in bold print by kf6tac/Brian**) and Jamie's (_written in italic print by Jamie Sommers_) POV.

Chapter 2:  Absence of Class 

He apologized to me, _and then_ he kissed me again. It was just a soft little peck, but it shot straight down to my toes. My heart felt like it was ready to explode. I still couldn't believe this was happening to me. Every time he kissed me...he touched me, I felt like something inside of me was exploding. He made me feel so incredible, so special and all of this from just a simple kiss and the touch of his hand. 

_ "10 Minutes," I sighed. "That's all?"_

"Yep." He leaned his forehead against mine and smiled into my eyes. "Come on," he said. "Let's take a walk."

He was still holding my hand, _then_ we turned and saw Dean and Belinda walking towards us. 'Lord,' I prayed, 'please _don't_ let anything happen. Please.'

They just walked by, but the look they gave me... You know that saying, if looks could kill? Well, I would've been dead on contact.

**I was quite relieved that Jamie wasn't upset with me for nearly getting caught in a fight in the middle of science class.  I was really amazed too, that even though I had brought us so close to getting in trouble she didn't even show any signs of getting angry.**

**We headed down the hall for our break, and as we walked toward the door we both saw Dean and Belinda walking in our direction.  I could feel my breathing speed up a bit, since I wasn't sure if Dean would want to finish the confrontation he had started earlier.  He definitely looked angry.  I kind of held my breath as they walked by, and when I was pretty sure they had passed us I let it out.  'That was a close one,' I thought to myself.  I had seen the way they looked at Jamie though, and I was pretty sure the tension between them and us wasn't over – not by a long shot.**

**Jamie and I just walked outside for most of our break, enjoying the weather.  The sun was shining, and it wasn't too hot out since we were still a ways off from the summer.  I made some jokes here and there, but for the most part we just held hands and walked.  It was like we didn't really need to say anything to each other, like we were reading each other's minds… for real this time.  It was a very welcome feeling.  Suffice it to say that I was pretty disappointed when the bell rang for us to get back to class.  We had history together though, so I guess it wouldn't be too bad at all.**

I've known Landon Carter my whole life and in all that time I never knew that just being with him could be so...wonderful. We just walked. We didn't really talk _much;_ we just enjoyed each other's company. We didn't need to talk. I loved the feeling of his hand in mine. I loved the way he tries to make me laugh...the way he smiles...the way he looks at me. But...is _this really love_? Why would God do this? Why would he show me love like this before...

"Hey. Bell. We better get to history class."

"Oh, sure."

**  
When we got into history class, I looked around the room.  None of Dean's crowd was in that class, so things would be a lot less stressful.  Mrs. Lansing, the teacher, was pretty laid back about the seating.  We pretty much got to pick our seats every day, although the class had sort of settled into its own arrangement earlier in the year.  Jamie usually sat next to Eddie Zimmerhoff, who was already there.  Jamie sat down next to Eddie.**

**"Hey Eddie," I said to him.  "Would you, uh, mind switching seats with me?"**

**Eddie looked up at me and replied, almost instantly, "No problem.  Just give me a second here to get my things together."**

**"Thanks man."**

After Eddie moved to a different seat, I sat down next to Jamie.  **Mrs. Lansing gave me a funny look and said to me, "Well, what a surprise to see you up here in the front row, Mr. Carter.**  Taking an interest in history are we?"

**"Oh yes, Mrs. Lansing.  I need my daily fix of New Deal policy," I replied, jokingly.**

**Jamie and Mrs. Lansing both started laughing at my joke.  I smiled to myself.  This was going to be a good day in history class.**

We left History then Landon insisted on walking me to Gym class even though it was on the opposite side of the school grounds from where he needed to be.

"It's not like I'm _gonna_ get sent to the office for being late to study hall _ya_ know?" 

He pecked me on the cheek at the entryway to the _girl's_ locker room and said, "See _ya_ at lunch."

I wasn't too worried about Gym today, even though Belinda and Tracy had the same class; they were hardly ever there. They always seemed to have a note from their "mother" saying that they weren't well--excusing them from participating--Miss. Fort, the P.E. teacher would always send them to the library...to study hall. Today however, it seemed that they were feeling just fine and were already standing in the locker room, dressed in their gym clothes, when I got there. 

I glanced at them when I walked in, _and then_ went straight to my locker--it was right next to Sally's. 

When she saw me she said all in one breath, "Do you have any idea how worried I've been about you today...where have you been, I haven't seen you at all today and when I asked Robin if she had seen you she said no, but she said Eddie saw you and that there was talk going around school about you and Landon and then when I asked Eddie if he had seen you he said that I should ask YOU where you've been, so...where have you been???" 

I wasn't quite sure what to tell her, to be honest she wasn't really that big a fan of Landon's. She thought he was cocky and full of himself. The day after the play she called me and spent about an hour talking about the unrehearsed kiss he gave me after I _sang._

"Landon Carter thinks he's 'God's Gift' to women and that he can do whatever he wants, with whoever he wants, whenever he wants. If I were you Jamie, I would press sexual _harassment_ charges against him." 

Sally had a great heart; it just got a little misplaced every now and then. That's when someone slammed my locker closed. I jumped and saw exactly who it was.

"Is there a problem?" I asked.

Now normally I wouldn't really let this type of thing bother me. Let's face it...being the Reverend's daughter, you get used to putting up with bullies, but Tracy...Tracy had this tone in her voice that could intimidate anyone.

"No. No problem. Why would you think that?" 

"Because you...you slammed my locker shut." I stuttered. I kept telling myself to calm down. _Same day, different bully._

"So the Virgin Mary wants to be one of us?"

"I really don't know what you're talking about." I tried to turn around and open my locker up but Tracy reached out and slammed it shut again.

"So what the hell is going on???" Belinda chimed in. "You think you're going to take my boyfriend away?" They kept getting closer to me. A crowd was forming around us and Sally had this shocked look on her face like she didn't know what to do. "Is that what you think? You think you can just take Landon from me?" 

"I thought you said you were through." Don't ask me where this courage, I suddenly developed, was coming from. I think it was from her calling Landon 'HER boyfriend.' 

"Well maybe we're not through...maybe..."

We all turned our heads when we heard, "What the hell is going on in here??"

Everyone parted as Miss. Fort walked through the crowd and stood in front of Belinda, Tracy and me. "Is someone going to answer me?" She asked.

Belinda and Tracy just stepped back and Tracy said, "There's nothing going on is there Jamie?"

I wasn't sure what to do. Should I tell Miss. Fort the truth or should I just turn the other cheek? "No Miss. Fort. There's nothing going on."

"Fine. Then let's get out on the field. Sullivan," she looked at me, "_get_ dressed."

She turned to walk away and I knew there was no way I could make it through gym class, let alone the locker room afterwards. _"_Miss. Fort? Would it be okay if I went to the _nurse's_ office? I don't feel so well." 

Miss. Fort was one of the few teachers that knew the truth about my health. I had asked her not to tell anyone--I didn't want anyone to be weird around me--but there were days when I just couldn't comply with the demands of P.E. so it was important for her to know the truth. Since then she never questioned me if I told her that I wasn't feeling well. Today she gave me this look that said, 'don't be afraid of these two, Sullivan' but agreed to let _me_ go. 

I watched everyone go out onto the _field_ then collapsed on the bench. Being Landon Carter's girlfriend was NOT going to be easy. I don't know when the tears started or even why, I just knew I needed to get out of there. I picked up my books and ran across campus to the library...to Landon.

**After history, I insisted on walking Jamie to gym class.  She probably thought I was a little nuts, since the library isn't anywhere near the girls' locker room.  But I finally talked her into it, since study hall isn't all that strict with attendance.  I dropper her off at the locker room and started my little trek back to the library.  The bell rang when I was about halfway there, but I didn't mind.  Mr. Martin, the librarian who somehow got stuck with the duty of monitoring study hall too, didn't really check to see who was there.  When I first met him at the beginning of the year I could've sworn that he was the only person in the world who was more anti-social than Jamie Sullivan.  He had serious personality issues.  Now I know I told Jamie once that she needed a new personality, but at least she is a friendly person to be around.  Mr. Martin… well… I think he has some sort of hatred for the human race.  It seems like he's not exactly a fan of person-to-person interactions.  He's always holed up in his office, reading some old text or another.  Or maybe he just doesn't like the students who sit in the library for study hall.**

**Today was no exception.  There was no one to be found in the main building of the library except for the students.  I took a seat at an empty table, and started thumbing through my homework.  I didn't usually do homework during study hall, but I wanted as much time free as I could get to spend with Jamie in the evening.  I had second thoughts about the homework though, after realizing that I had to read five chapters out of The Scarlet Letter.  I quickly stuck the book back into my bag.  'I'm sure I'll get enough of the fire and brimstone speech from Reverend Sullivan tonight anyways,' I thought to myself.  I still got the impression that the man didn't like me much.  Oh well.  I decided to do my trig homework instead.  Triangles.  Yeah, I could do that without much problem.  Well – maybe one problem: my trig book wasn't in my bag.  Apparently I left it in my locker.  I glanced at the clock.  Class had already been going for about fifteen minutes, which meant I would have to get a pass from Mr. Martin.  The school is pretty up tight about people in the halls if more than ten minutes had passed since the bell.**

**Mr. Martin was in his office with the door propped open, so I knocked on the door before walking on in.  He looked up from one of his books and sort of stared at me.  **

**"Mr. Martin, I was wondering if I could get a pass to go to my locker.  I forgot one of my math books."**

**He didn't really say anything, but he pulled out a pass and filled it out for me.  Never once did he stop glaring at me.  It was a look that kind of said "Yeah Carter, I know what you're really up to."**

**I took the pass and left.  Boy, that guy is creepy.  I walked out of the library at a fairly quick pace, so I could get to my locker and back before Mr. Martin thought I was out drinking or something.  As I rounded the corner, I ran right into someone going the opposite direction.**

I just kept telling myself to stop. 'Stop crying, Jamie.' I didn't want Landon to see me this way, but with every step I took the tears just seemed to pour down my face. I knew it wasn't just because of what happened in the locker room, but what was happening with Landon. I started having this conversation with myself...with God.

'Why are you doing this? You know it'll never lead anywhere. Yes, but he said that he loved me. And do you love him? Yes...yes I do. Then you need to tell him the truth. NO! Not yet. I will...just not yet. Not now. I just want things to be...normal for awhile.'

But I knew the longer I waited to tell him, the harder it was going to be. The tears started again and I picked up my pace. Maybe I should just go to the _nurse's_ office after all. Maybe this whole Landon thing is a bad idea. Maybe...maybe... *SLAM*

"Hey, I'm sorry… I didn't know you were coming around – Jamie?!?"

**As soon as I realized it was her, I loosened up a lot.  Then I noticed she had tears running down her cheeks.**

**"Oh baby, what's the matter?" I asked, pulling her to me and wrapping my arms around her.  "Why aren't you in gym?"**

**She was pretty shaken up though, and I could tell she wasn't up to answering just yet.**

**"It's alright, here – walk with me to my locker and you can come to study hall with me."**

**We went to my locker and I grabbed my trig book.  When we walked into the library, Mr. Martin was out at the circulation desk checking a book out to a student from another class.  When he saw me walk in with one arm around Jamie, he seemed pretty angry.  I sat Jamie down at a desk and walked over to my other seat to get my backpack.  When I passed Mr. Martin, he said to me, "Carter, in my office."**

**He shut the door when we got inside.  Yeah, he was angry about something all right.**

**"Carter, I gave you a note to go get your trig book, not to bring one of your girlfriends into my study hall.  Now go back out there and send her to whatever class she came from."**

**Wow, Mr. Martin must have been more anti-social than I realized.  No adults in their right minds who lived in Beaufort would talk about Jamie that way.  I really wasn't sure what to say to him.  I was angry that he could be so heartless to Jamie, but yelling and fighting with him probably wouldn't do me much good.  I decided to try something a little new.  I decided to be sincere and humble for once.**

**"Mr. Martin, I know I was only supposed to go to my locker and back.  But I ran into Jamie in the hallway.  She's been having a really rough day; don't you think you can cut us some slack just this once?  Please?  She's really shook up."**

**Mr. Martin narrowed his eyes and looked at me suspiciously.  I guess there was some glimmer of humanity in him though, because he finally said it was okay and he went back to his book.  I walked out of his office, wondering to myself, 'How much longer until lunch again?'**

Landon was so sweet to me. He put his arms around me and took me into study hall with him. I knew he was in trouble, but he wouldn't admit it.

"Landon. I can leave. Why don't I _got_ to the office and..." I started picking up my bags, but he put his hands on mine to stop me.

"No. Don't go. Don't worry about Martin," he looked towards the office he just came from, "he's got a stick up his...ahem..."

The look on Landon's face when he caught himself before making a...very inappropriate comment about Mr. _Martin,_ was priceless. We just started laughing. We couldn't seem to stop. We got a lot of curious looks, but we just ducked our heads down and giggled. We tried to do our homework, but one of us would look up from our book and we'd just start giggling again. Mr. Martin came out to see what was going on, but the bell rang just in time. 

Landon held his arm out for me and said, "Miss. Sullivan, would you do me the honor of joining me for lunch?"

I placed my arm through his and said, "I'd love to." 

**As Jamie and I walked down the hall toward the cafeteria, I tried to plan out the rest of my day.  I had English lit, psychology, and gym classes after lunch.  I knew Jamie already had psych and gym earlier in the day, which meant I was only going to have English lit. with her after lunch.  When I realized this, I had this funny feeling… kind of the way I felt when she told me that day in the cafeteria that I was feeding her a bunch of bull.  Well – almost in those words.  I guess I was kind of disappointed.  I could have sworn that Jamie was in every single one of my classes back when I wanted nothing to do with her.  Now though, now when all I wanted to do was be with her, it turns out we only have three actual classes together.   'I guess I'll need to work on those counting skills if I'm ever going to get anywhere after high school,' I thought to myself with a smile.  I guess Jamie caught me grinning like a moron at my own lame joke.**

**"What's so funny Landon?" she asked, sincerely curious.**

**"Oh, it's nothing… just laughing at my own dumb jokes in my head."**

**"Maybe you should tell me, so I can laugh too and people won't think you're entirely crazy."**

**"Why don't I do that over lunch," I said to her, opening the door to the cafeteria so she could step inside.**

Coming Soon:

Chapter 3: Lunch Table Seven


	3. Lunch Table Seven

The Lord's Plan 

By:  kf6tac (Brian) and Jamie Sommers

Email: kf6tac@yahoo.com

          Jamiesommers23@hotmail.com

Rated: PG-13

Synopsis:  This story is about Landon and Jamie's budding relationship.  They've had their first date; Landon has told her he loves her, now they have to face their friends, their family and their own fears.  Written from both Landon (**written in bold print by kf6tac/Brian**) and Jamie's (_written in italic print by Jamie Sommers_) POV.

Chapter 3:  Lunch Table Seven

**The cafeteria was already starting to fill up with people when we came in.  I noticed that Jamie was looking around the room.**

**"What's up Jamie?"**

**"Oh, I was just wondering where you wanted to sit…" she said, sounding a little bit uncertain.**

**I kissed her on the forehead and smiled.  "Lunch table seven, of course?  Where else would I want to go?"**

**She seemed a little bit surprised, but then a big smile formed across her face.  She's so pretty when she smiles.  We headed on over to table seven, which was just waiting for us.  I pulled Jamie's chair out for her, and sat down at the next seat over.  It felt good; the last time she and I had sat there she wasn't exactly happy with me.  I watched as she pulled her lunch out of her backpack.**

**"Aren't you going to eat Landon?" she asked me when she noticed I hadn't really moved.**

**"Well I actually don't usually eat lunch… I'll have a snack now and then, and sometimes my mom gives me a sandwich.  But usually I wait 'til I get home."**

**"Landon, you really should eat something.  It's good for you.  Come on."**

**Then she gave me that look.  You know, the one where her eyes twinkle and she kind of stares at me in a pleading way.  Jamie had the most amazing way of appealing to me… first getting me to dance in public, now she was getting me to eat school lunch. **

**"Alright, I'll be right back.  Did you want anything?" I asked as I got up.**

**"Mmmmm, I'm alright Landon.  Just don't be gone too long," she said with a smirk.**

**"I'll be back as soon as I can!" I replied as I walked briskly toward the lunch line.**

**'Hmmm… a little pizza sounds good about now.  Yep – pizza and a Coke.'**

_I knew I was smiling. I just couldn't seem to help it. His words kept repeating in my head over and over again. _

_"You sit at lunch table seven, which isn't exactly the reject table but it's definitely inside of exile territory..." _

_He waved to me while he was getting his tray. 'Welcome to exile territory,' I smiled and thought, 'better be careful Landon, next thing you know you'll be volunteering to tutor on weekends.'_

"All right!_ Spill it!"_

_I looked up to see Sally standing above me, just glaring down at me. "Spill what?" _

_"You know what." She looked over to the back of the cafeteria where Landon normally resided and said, "Why isn't Landon sitting with his friends today?  Why did Belinda and Tracy try and kill you today? Why are you smiling non stop?"_

_I took a sip from my juice box, unable to wipe that silly grin off of my face, and just shrugged my shoulders mumbling an indistinguishable, "I don't know."_

_"Don't give me that Jamie. What's going on between you two?" She looked really concerned._

_"Sally," I wasn't really sure what to tell her. How do you tell your friend what's going on, when you don't really know yourself? _

_"Landon and I..." I looked over at him again, his back was to me and he was looking up at what the school was offering for lunch today on _its_ overhead menu. "...we're..." _

_She was worried he was going to hurt me, I could tell just by the look she was giving me. If only she knew the truth. The only one that really risked getting hurt if this relationship panned _out,_ was Landon. _

_"We're what, Jamie? What are you and Landon?"_

_I just smiled at her. I didn't know what to tell her, how to phrase it. I definitely couldn't tell her I thought I loved him. I think Landon should be the first one to hear that. _

Before I could even answer she said, "He's _gonna hurt you, ya know? Look at what he did to Belinda and they're friends!!  Do you even know why he dumped Belinda?"_

_He was looking at me. I don't know how I knew--I just knew. I could feel it like fingers running across my spine._

_"Jamie?? Are you even listening to me?"_

_Somebody tapped his shoulder and told him to move up in line. I could make out his 'Oh, right. Sorry buddy,' from where I was sitting. He just winked at me and took a few steps._

_"Don't worry about me, Sally." I told her, "I know what I'm doing."_

_I don't think she believed me. She shook her head back and forth and said, "Look. No matter what happens--I just want you to know--I'll be there for you, okay?"_

_"I know." _

I stood up and walked over to where Landon was in line and put my hand on his elbow.  "Hey.  So what're you gonna get?"

He looked at me with the most mischievous grin I'd ever seen and said, "I'd tell ya, but then I'd have to kill ya."

_"Well hello, Jamie. How're you today?"_

_"I'm fine Mrs. Marsh and yourself?"_

_"Just fine thank you. What can I get for you today?"_

_"Oh, I brought my lunch but," I turned to look at Landon and said, "what'll you have?"_

_"Uhm...got any pizza?"_

_"I'm sorry we're out."_

"Oh...how about a burger?"

_"Landon," I laughed, "This isn't a restaurant," then something dawned on me. "Landon, have you **ever** eaten in the cafeteria?"_

_"No. I told you I just wait till I get home. I've never really been into all this shi...stuff before." He looked quickly towards Mrs. Marsh and said, "No offense."_

_"Oh, don't worry young man, none taken. But you will have to decide quickly--the natives are getting restless." She pointed out the long line of hungry students forming behind him._

"Okay...I guess I'll have... ummm..." he looked at me with pleading eyes.

_"Give him the tater tot casserole, Mrs. Marsh."_

_"Good choice," she said as she plopped a pile of ground beef mixed with string beans and tater tots on his plate. She garnished it with a roll, some fruit and a carton of milk in lieu of a coke._

_Sitting back down at our table, he picked up his fork and gave the conglomeration a questionable look._

_I said a quick thanks to God for our food and said, "Go ahead and try it. It's really not that bad."_

_"I'm sure it's great, but...what's this white creamy stuff holding it together? _Glue?"

_"No," I laughed, "It's cream of mushroom soup."_

_"Oh." He held the fork in front of his mouth and held his breath while he shoved the culinary delight in. "Hey!" He said, with a mouthful of food, "This isn't half bad."_

_"See. I told you."_

_"Yeah, but to be on the safe side, I think I'll just pack a lunch from now on." We chuckled a bit then he asked, "So what did Sally want?"_

_I took a deep breath and let it out telling him. "I guess your friends aren't the only ones that aren't too happy about you and me."_

_"Well," he put his hand on mine, "don't worry about it. I don't care what anybody thinks about you and me except for you and me. '_kay_?"_

_" 'kay_."_ I agreed. I suppose I knew it would be like this the moment I agreed to go out with him. We were from two different sides of the track, him and _I_. Sure we both grew up in Beaufort, went to the same schools, we even sat next to each other in the second grade but... It's funny how two people from the same town can live in two completely different worlds. I guess_ I_ should probably find out about his world a little bit._

_"Landon? Can I ask you something?"_

_"Sure."_

_"What happened between you and Belinda?" He just looked at me like he was dumbstruck. "**Why **did you break up?"_

**I kinda choked when Jamie asked me about Belinda.  I would've liked to have blamed it on the funny-lookin' tater tot casserole I had on my tray, but the stuff wasn't actually that terrible so it wouldn't really be fair to Mrs. Marsh.  Truth be told, the whole situation with Belinda has had me walking on eggshells ever since we broke up.  I never really told anyone the truth about it… and I guess Belinda had started some pretty nasty rumors to get back at me.  Funny how she would start rumors on the one hand and then try to get back together with me on the other hand, all at the same time.Oh well.  I just couldn't believe that Jamie was asking me about it now.**

**"Well… why do _you think I broke up with her?"  I needed to stall… not too long, but long enough so I didn't say something stupid._**

**"I haven't the slightest clue Landon – that's why I'm asking you.  I'd like to know."**

**It looked like I didn't have all that much of a choice.  She had me pretty much in a corner, and I wouldn't be able to talk my way out of it.  So much for stalling while I collected my thoughts.**

**"Please, Landon.  I really need to know what went on."**

**I gulped.  I guess someone had to find out sooner or later.  Better that it would be Jamie than some gossip queen.  I lowered my voice a bit when I spoke.**

**"Honestly, Jamie?  I broke up with Belinda because… well… she was way too possessive.  I mean – she would barely let me talk to any other girls without getting suspicious.  That and… she wouldn't take no for an answer."**

**"You mean she wanted to…" Jamie trailed off, getting the big picture here.**

**"Yup.  I wasn't ready for it, and she just kept pressuring me, so I eventually just broke up with her."**

**"That's not a terrible thing, Landon," she re-assured me.  "Why would people act like you did something so mean when you broke up with her?"**

**"Well _that," I said while looking down at the table, "that was one of Landon Carter's more retarded moments."_**

**"What do you mean?"**

**"I wasn't ready to sleep with Belinda, but at the same time I had this big image to keep up.  You know how it was with me back then.  So anyways, I stupidly decided that the best way to do this and still maintain the macho guy image was to use some lame excuse on her.  I ended up telling her that I didn't want to lose our friendship if something went wrong with the dating, you know… the same old line.  I guess that got her pretty mad, 'causethe next thing I knew there were these rumors going around about how I was such a terrible boyfriend."**

**I paused for a minute as I remembered that night… and the way Belinda had reacted to my "high-quality" breakup line.**

**'Look Belinda, we've been friends for a long time… maybe too long.'**

**'What's that supposed to mean Landon?'**

**'It means that… Belinda… I think we should see other people.'**

**'But Landon, I don't want to see other people.  I just want to be with you.'  She tried to convince me by brushing up against me.**

**'Yeah,' I had said, pushing her away.  'Well maybe I want to see other people.'  I had acted so cocky when I told her that… typical.  I knew she hadn't deserved to be treated like that, but what the heck was I supposed to tell her?  'If we stay together Belinda, we'll eventually have sex and the idea of you being my first is just… unthinkable.'  Nope, that obviously wasn't going to work for big-shot Landon Carter.  Couldn't tell her that I wasn't ready to have sex.  So instead she got 'It's my senior year – I just don't want to be tied down.'**

**'Fine,' she said sharply, clearly disappointed.  'Whatever.'  
  
'Hey, Belinda,' I said, reaching out to her as she angrily opened her front door.  'You know we can still be friends.'**

**'Sure Landon.  Friends."**

**I held my breath while Jamie contemplated what I had just told her.  I didn't want her to be angry with me because I was such a jerk to Belinda.  Even more importantly, I didn't want her to think that I would do it again.  When she just stayed quiet, I decided to say something.**

**"Ummm… Jamie?  You're not angry with me are you?"**

**"Oh no Landon, I'm not.  I'll admit it wasn't all that nice for you to give Belinda an excuse like that, but I'm pleasantly surprised that you chose not to sleep with her."**

**"Surprised?  Come on Jamie, what kind of a bad guy did you think I was?" I said to her with a grin and a hint of sarcasm in my voice.**

**She laughed, ****then**** said to me, "Well I didn't think you were all that terrible… but my father… I'm not too sure about him.  You know what he told me, that night you gave me the new sweater?"  She looked at me with a smile.**

**"What did he tell you?"**

**"He told me that boys like you have 'expectations'."**

**"Me?  **

**Neeever…."**

**She laughed again, that happy bubbling laughter that I had come to love in the past few days.  "I guess it just goes to show that you can't trust rumors.  Are you going to finish your lunch?  It looks like it'sgetting cold."**

**"Yeah, it is.  I should probably finish this up."**

**I swallowed a mouthful of milk out of the carton, and noticed that Jamie was again smiling at me.**

**"What is it?"**

**"You… you've got… milk all over your upper lip," she finally told me, interrupted occasionally by her giggles.**

**I sighed to myself as I wiped the milk off my lip.  I was so in love with Jamie Sullivan.**

_Although I was a little dismayed at the way Landon handled his breakup with Belinda, I wasn't all that shocked. He did have a reputation for being a "bad boy" but what he **was**and what he **is** are two different things. It never dawned on me that he would do something like that to me--it just wasn't in him. There was one thing I needed to know though--one question I had to ask. _

_"Landon? **Why **didn't you sleep with her?" _

_The look on his face when he answered me was one that will be burned in my memory forever. _

_"I didn't love her." _

I watched as he made his way to the trash receptacle with the uneaten portion of his lunch, when I felt a hand on my shoulder. Without even looking I knew who it was. 

_"What do you want, Belinda?"_

_"To finish the conversation we started in gym." She looked at me with such contempt. Tracy was standing behind her, with Dean and the rest of them to the side. _

_I started gathering up mine and Landon's things, intent on avoiding another conflict, wondering 'Will this ever end?' _

"You're not going anywhere." She threw my backpack to the ground and stepped closer to me. I could hear the laughter coming from her group of friends behind me. Landon must've heard it too because he turned around to see what the commotion was. When he saw the circle of people beginning to form around Belinda, and me he dropped his tray to the ground and ran back, forcing his way through the barricade of onlookers.

_"Knock it off Belinda!" He picked up my bag and grabbed his things, "Come on Jamie," he held onto my arm as if to escort me out._

_"I don't get it Landon." Dean chimed in. "A few weeks ago you were standing on the front lawn making fun of her and now you're protecting her?? What the hell..."_

_"JUST BACK OFF DEAN!" He tried to push us through the crowd but Dean wouldn't let up._

"So that's it? You're just gonna throw away your real friends for...for...The Virgin Mary?" He paused, "Or is she?"

_Landon stopped abruptly, letting our stuff _drop_ to the ground. I knew what he was going to do and I tried to tell him to let it go, "...lets just walk away."_

_He shook his head and whispered to me, "This ends here."_

_He walked back to stand face-to-face with Dean. I was sure he was going to hit him again, but he didn't. He looked at him and said, "My real friends? That's what you think you are?" He looked around at all of them, his eyes lingering on Eric's face a little longer than the rest and said, "If you were my real friends then you'd accept her and me. You'd accept the fact that I love her and I want to be with her." There was nothing but silence through the entire lunchroom at his confession, "Yeah...that's what I thought." He turned around and walked back to me picking up our bags and holding onto my hand. He led us out onto the school's grounds leaving the group of them staring at our backs in disbelief._

**As I was dumping my tray at the trashcan, I heard some sort of commotion going on behind me.  I figured one of the jocks had just dumped milk all over a freshman or something, but when I turned around I couldn't believe what I was seeing.  Belinda had just grabbed Jamie's backpack out of her hands and thrown it onto the floor.  That girl… she seriously just wouldn't take no for an answer.  I just dropped my tray right there on the floor and ran quickly back to Lunch Table Seven.  I had to push my way through the crowd that had gathered, but that didn't pose too much of a problem.**

**"Knock it off Belinda!"  Didn't that girl understand that we were totally through?  What kind of sign was she looking for?**

**I took Jamie's arm in my hand and started to lead her out of the room.  And then Dean had to open his big mouth.**

**"I don't get it Landon.  A few weeks ago you were standing on the front lawn making fun of her and how you're protecting her??  What the hell…"**

**The guy just didn't know when to shut up.  "JUST BACK OFF DEAN!!"**

**I really just wanted to leave, but Dean wouldn't budge.  What the heck did he want from us?  I could tell he was just waiting for me to try and knock a few teeth loose again… only this time I was pretty sure he'd fight back.**

"So that's it?  You're just gonna throw away your real friends for… for… the Virgin Mary?"  He gave Jamie another spiteful look, and then added in, "Or is she?"

**That was it.  Dean had gone too far this time.  I thought maybe he'd get the idea that I was in love with Jamie without me having to spell it out to him letter by letter, but I guess I was wrong.  I dropped our stuff on the ground, and walked over to stand face-to-face with Dean.  Jamie tried to stop me, but this had to stop.  I was tired of it, and I was sure that even Jamie would get tired of being bullied around sooner or later.**

**"My real friends?" I questioned Dean, staring right into his eyes.  I hoped he could feel my glare burning into him, because this was something I wanted him to remember.  "That's what you think you are?"**

**I glared around the room, daring someone to speak up.  I stopped when I got to Eric.  He had this look on his face… he looked really shocked, confused even.  I kind of felt sorry for the guy.  I knew that he never really started trouble; he just followed along with the crowd.  I wanted to forgive him, but I couldn't tell if he had the guts to stop following the crowd.  I didn't know what to do for him at the moment.  **

**"If you were my real friends then you'd accept her and me.  You'd accept the fact that I love her and want to be with her."  After I had finished, I kept thinking to myself 'Come on Eric.  Say something.  Do something.  Don't just stand there like the rest of them.  You're better than that, come on man!'**

**But he didn't say anything.  And neither did the rest of them.  I guess there wasn't much more I could do to make Eric budge.  He'd just have to come to it on his own.**

**"Yeah… that's what I thought."  I picked up our bags, took Jamie's hand, and walked out of the cafeteria into the schoolyard.**

**"I'm so sorry about that Jamie," I said to her after we got outside.  "Those guys are a bunch of jerks.  I guess Lunch Table Seven is going to be empty for awhile."**

**"It's alright, Landon.  I'm used to stuff like this.  Besides, the weather out here is really nice.  We can always find a different place to eat."  That's my Jamie.   Always optimistic about everything.  ******

"Yeah, I just hope they leave you alone from now on.  I'd like to be there for ya all day, but … well unfortunately we don't have every class together like I had thought."

**"I'll be fine, Landon," she said to me with a smile.  "I think you made the point in there."**

**The bell rang as we were walking along on the grass.  Looking over my shoulder back to the school, I said to Jamie "Well I guess it's time to go to English lit.  We can always look for a new place to eat lunch tomorrow."  I bent down and kissed her before continuing.**

**"Are you ready to go back in there Landon?" she asked.**

**"As long as you're with me, yeah – let's go."**

**Coming soon:**

**Chapter 4**


	4. As You Like It

The Lord's Plan 

By:  kf6tac (Brian) and Jamie Sommers

Email: kf6tac@yahoo.com

          Jamiesommers23@hotmail.com

Rated: PG-13

Synopsis:  This story is about Landon and Jamie's budding relationship.  They've had their first date; Landon has told her he loves her, now they have to face their friends, their family and their own fears.  Written from both Landon (**written in bold print by kf6tac/Brian**) and Jamie's (_written in italic print by Jamie Sommers_) POV.

Chapter 4:  As You Like It 

_We had one last class together: English literature.  We walked into class and found the chairs arranged in a circle, since we had taken our time getting there the only two chairs available were on opposite sides of the circle, so we couldn't sit next to one another, but we **were** able to look at each other and looking at Landon was just as wonderful as sitting next to him._

_The minute the bell rang; Mr. Warren immediately began his discussion about Shakespeare.  All though his work was highly regarded, I must admit, I've never really been a big fan of his work.  I respected it and could appreciate it, but I never really found romantic notions in tragedies like Romeo and Juliet.  If they had just believed in one another, they would've never had to go through the pain that they did, but then again, I guess it wouldn't be considered a tragedy, would it?_

_" 'As You Like It' is one of my favorite pieces of literature from Shakespeare," Mr. Warren began telling us the basic gist of a story about star-crossed lovers, as many of Shakespeare's plays are.  He began to call upon people to read certain passages from the play then we would discuss the meaning of it out loud.  _

_I was somewhat relieved that he didn't ask me to do a reading.  'Five more minutes of class left,' I thought.  Then…_

_"Jamie?  Would you begin reading Rosalind's speech on page 126 please?"_

_'Me?' I thought, 'I know I'm in the drama department, but Shakespeare was **not** my best work.'_

_"Sure."  I took a deep breath and glanced at Landon who was giving me this look like he was saying, 'better you than me.'  With a sigh I started reading it, trying to understand Shakespeare's vision along the way._

_"O, I know where you are: nay, 'tis true: there was never any thing so sudden but the fight of two rams and Caesar's thrasonical brag of 'I came, saw, and overcame:'" _

_"Hold on a second Jamie.  Do you know what she's saying here?" He meant Rosalind, the character I was reading._

_"Ummm…that…ummm…" I had no clue.  I shook my head 'no' and looked down at the book trying my best to decipher Shakespeare's code._

_"Does anyone know what she's saying in this passage?  Anybody?"  He looked around the circle and realized that no one got it.  "This is where Rosalind is admitting that she did in fact have a plan to get Orlando's brother and her sister together.  Ahhhh, but something unexpected happened along the way… she fell in love.  Why don't you continue Jamie and listen to what she's saying.  Go ahead." _

_I looked back at Landon for a moment, expecting to see that familiar lopsided grin, but found it replaced with an encouraging smile.  I began, "…for your brother and my sister no sooner met but they looked, no sooner looked but they loved, no sooner loved but they sighed, no sooner sighed but they asked one another the reason, no sooner knew the reason but they sought the remedy; and in these degrees have they made a pair of stairs to marriage which they will climb incontinent, or else be incontinent before marriage: they are in the very wrath of love and they will together; clubs cannot part them."  _

_"Thank you Jamie.  Does anybody know what it is Shakespeare's saying here…what, in fact, Rosalind is saying?"  _

_Before Mr. Warren could explain it to us, Landon broke the silence._

_"She's saying that regardless of her ploy to bring them together, they still would've gotten together.  They would've found each other in spite of her actions, not because of them.  Ya see," he looked at me with a gentle expression filling his eyes and huskiness to his voice that had me entranced, making me feel as though we were the only two people in the room.  "Once they let their walls down they were able to see each other and all it took was for them to look…to **really** look at one another, to realize that there was something more between them…something special…beautiful.  That they loved each other and the love they found is what'll help them to overcome every obstacle they face in life." His voice was so soft, breathy, "That they can make it through anything as long as they face it together.  And that nothing will ever break them apart as long as they hold onto that love." _

_"Very good Landon!!"  Mr. Warren said.  "That is one …"_

_My heart was beating so fast, I could feel it pulsing in my throat.  My stomach was churning, my palms sweating.  I couldn't take my eyes off of him. I knew he was talking about us, about what we had faced today with our friends, but he had no clue the obstacles that were in front of us.   I was in love with him.  So much in love with him, but was that love strong enough to overcome **any** obstacle?  I knew the answer before I even asked myself the question.  'Yes.  Yes it was.'  _

_The bell rang and we were off to face the remainder of the day on our own.  _

_"So, I guess I'll see ya after school." I loved the way his lips moved when he said the word, 'school.'_

_"I guess so," I could barely speak, barely breath.  "Have a good day."_

_"You too."  _

_We weren't moving.  We just stood there in the hallway, staring at each other, holding hands.  I couldn't seem to let go of his hands…of him and for the first time since we began dating, I was the one to lean in for a kiss.  It was just a brief touch of our lips, but I could feel it cause my heart to swell.  _

_The clock was ticking and it was getting closer and closer to our next period.  There was always the afternoon break, but we were going to be on opposite sides of the campus so by the time we met up, there would be hardly enough time to get to our last class.  There was no conceivable way for us to see each other until the end of the school day--which neither one of us was too happy about--on the plus side, the remainder of the day passed by uneventfully, and very, **VERY **slowly.  _

**I didn't think I'd ever sit in a circle again after kindergarten ended.  I mean – doesn't everyone sit in rows facing the chalkboard?  I guess I was wrong though, because a circle was exactly what I saw when Jamie and I walked into English lit. class.  We got in just a little bit before the bell, so we didn't exactly have much of a choice in sitting across from each other.  It was good enough for me though, I couldn't ask for a prettier face to sit across from than Jamie's.  I guess Mr. Warren planned to discuss Shakespeare that day; Warren was a total Shakespeare buff.  I myself, was not a fan of Shakespeare's.  By the time senior year hit, Cliff's Notes were already my best friends in English class.**

**We were talking about "As you Like It" today, and even though I thumbed through the Cliff's Notes the night before I really didn't feel like talking much.  Shakespeare was tough for me to understand, and more likely than not my responses in class were met with silence.  I just sat there grinning at Jamie – I figured other people could probably see me, but what the heck.  I could grin if I wanted to.  Mr. Warren called on Jamie to read the last section of our assignment for the day in the last couple of minutes in class.  I thought to myself that Jamie would do great, the amazing actress she was and all.  When Warren called on her though, I saw her facial expression change from anticipating the bell to one of… some sort of disappointment.  I realized then that Jamie wasn't a fan of Shakespeare either.  I never would have guessed.**

**She got through the first chunk of lines all right though.  Then Warren stopped her and asked her to explain the meaning of the passage.  She seemed pretty lost when she finally shook her head 'no.'  I looked around the room, and noticed that even Janet, one of our class's biggest Shakespeare followers, looked pretty perplexed.  I looked back at Jamie, hoping she would look up.  I just wanted to mouth to her "It's okay."  But she kept looking at her book, so I settled back and waited for Mr. Warren to just explain the darn thing so we could move on.  He finally figured out that no one really knew what Shakespeare was talking about, so he explained to us that the passage was describing this girl Rosalind's plan to hook her sister up with some guy named Orlando's brother, only she somehow fell head over heels for the Orlando while she was trying. **

**Warren asked Jamie to finish up, and she looked up.  I looked at her and smiled the friendliest and most loving smile I could conjure up.  I wanted her to know that I thought she was great no matter what.  She finished the section of the play, but this time I was listening intently to what she was reading.  Elizabethan English was some pretty weird stuff, but I realized that behind all that fluff, Shakespeare was talking about the inevitability of love.  How Rosalind's sister and Orlando's brother would have fallen in love even if Rosalind had just sat at home and done nothing.  I thought about Jamie and her faith, how she never doubted anything that came her way.  She always accepted it as part of God's plan for her, and I guess for her some things were just inevitable.  Like falling in love with me.**

When Mr. Warren asked for a response this time, I knew exactly what I was going to say.

**My heart was pounding as I spoke up.  "She's saying that regardless of her ploy to bring them together, they still would've gotten together.  They would've found each other in spite of her actions, not because of them.  Ya see," I said, gazing at Jamie and admiring her for her faith and her certainty,  "Once they let their walls down they were able to see each other and all it took was for them to look…to _really look at one another, to realize that there was something more between them…something special…beautiful.  That they loved each other and the love they found is what'll help them to overcome every obstacle they face in life.  That they can make it through anything as long as they face it together.  And that nothing will ever break them apart as long as they hold onto that love."  And I knew it was all true.  Not just for the play, but for Jamie and me as well.  I never let her into my life before I got forced into the spring play, but once I did… I was forced to forget all my pre-conceived opinions of her.  Between running lines with her, rehearsing with the class, and actually performing on stage, I realized that there was a whole lot more to Jamie Sullivan than I had ever known.  And she helped me learn that there was a lot more to me, too._**

**Mr. Warren looked really surprised at my response, but before he could finish up his thoughts the bell rang.  I picked up my stuff and watched as Jamie walked over to meet me.  I was mesmerized by her, and I knew that no matter what, we would get through anything.  I wasn't going to let Dean and his crowd of followers stop us from being together.  Her father, well I could change his mind too if I just worked hard enough at it.  And once he was convinced, everything would be all right.  I just knew it.**

**It took me awhile to realize that Jamie was already standing right in front of me.  We walked into the hall, and we just stood there again.  I was completely lost in her eyes, and from what I could tell she was lost in me too.  I knew we had to get to our own classes though, but before I turned to leave she leaned in to kiss me.  It was just a short kiss, but I still felt the sparks surging through my body from head to toe.  I almost had to tear myself away from her to move on to psychology.**

Trigonometry.  I never realized how much I hated that class until the moment I had to walk away from Landon to go there.  'This is ridiculous.  I mean...it's just a couple of hours, right?  I'll be fine.  It's not like I haven't survived the past 18 years without him.  I did just fine without Landon Carter before, so I'll do just fine now.'  No matter how many times I told myself that it always ended with the same sentiment, ' Yeah…sure you will Jamie.'  

_I sighed as I walked towards my last class of the day—I still had drama, but that never really seemed like a class to me.  As I walked into the room I noticed Eric sitting in the back, he lifted his head up to look at me and for a moment I thought he was going to say something, but he didn't.  He just turned around and started talking to the kid next to him.  Sitting in my customary seat—front row, next to the window—I took out my book and got settled in for the longest 50 minutes of my life.  For a girl that was grateful for every second God saw fit to give her, all I kept thinking was, ' will this class ever end?'  _

_I spent the entire period doing something I would never think of doing before--I was doodling.  I just picked up my pencil and started scribbling stupid things down on my paper like, Jamie and Landon forever and Landon loves Jamie.  When the bell rang I looked down at my notebook and noticed that I had filled up not only the entire page with meaningless drawings of hearts and flowers and sentiments of love, but I had gotten some on the desk as well.  **This **was **not** something I did.  Doodling was something other girls did, not me.  Definitely, not me!  'Then why is your book covered with it?' I thought.  _

I'm not actually all that sure what happened today in psychology.  I know that there was something being said about some weird "Oedipus complex", along with some other psychological things.  I figured I'd just read the book later on and figure it all out.  It's not like there was any math involved.  All I could do during class was think about Jamie.  And since there was no one from Dean's circle in that class, I could do a lot of thinking.  I sat in the back, like usual, just day-dreaming the time away.  Mr. Olsen… well he was lost somewhere in a textbook reading to us about different subconscious thoughts and all that type of stuff.  When the bell rang for my ten-minute break, I walked quickly out to my locker.  After what happened in the cafeteria at lunch, I had been planning to just empty it out.  I didn't want to have to deal with Dean every time I needed a book.  I figured I could just share with Jamie or something until I could talk to Principal Kelly about getting a new one.

While I was busy removing all my books, I heard someone come up behind me.

"Hey man, what are you doin'?"  I didn't need to turn around to know that it was Eric.

"What's it look like?  I'm emptying my locker.  Something tells me I'm not exactly welcome here anymore."  I just kept emptying my locker, not even bothering to turn my face.

"No man, that's not what I meant.  I want to know what you're _doing."_

I dropped my last book onto the pile on the floor and turned to face Eric.  "I think I should be the one asking you that question.  Where were you in that cafeteria huh?  Look, I expected this kind of crap from everyone else but not from you.  I thought you'd be cool with it."

Eric was taken aback by my comment, apparently.  He stumbled a bit getting his next words out.  "Well… uh, man… I couldn't just bail on Dean."

"But you can bail on me, right?  You couldn't bail on Dean, who you've only known since we started high school… so instead you bailed on me, your friend since we were in kindergarten?"

More silence.  They say silence is golden, but in a situation like this… it was just the opposite.  I knew I was losing Eric, that every second no one said anything the gap between us was getting bigger and bigger.  What could I do though?  My thoughts raced at what seemed like an incredible speed.  I tried to remember what changed me… what finally got me to open up.  'The answer to that is obvious Carter--it was Jamie.  But Eric doesn't have Jamie.'  The reality of that was painful… the only reason I changed was because Jamie became a part of my life.  And without someone like Jamie, it looked like Eric was just going to be another lost cause… unless…. Some sort of a plan slowly formed in my mind.  It was a risky long shot, but…

I turned back and shut my locker.  As I picked up my books to leave, I said to Eric, "Look Eric, I thought I saw something in you.  Something good.  But… I was very wrong."

As I walked away, I hoped Jamie's words could be the jump-start that Eric needed, just as they had been for me.

Since we had finished with the play, drama class was back to basics.  Miss Garber spent a lot of time teaching us the fine art of Improvisations and mirroring techniques.  We got to do skits and sometimes we would just sit around the piano and sing show tunes.  Today we were doing relaxation exercises—lying down on the stage with our eyes closed, tensing up every muscle, starting at our toes, until gradually you were tensing up your entire body then relaxing it.  I lied down on stage between Sally — who hadn't said anything to me since lunch — and Eddie.  I closed my eyes and the next thing I knew I was looking up at Landon.  I had fallen asleep on stage and since Miss. Garber had a habit of ignoring the last bell of the day, he had come to drama to pick me up and take me home.  Everyone was gone, with the exception of Miss. Garber and Eddie.  

_"Hey," he said softly.  He tilted his head to the side and pursed his lips, "was class really that boring?"_

_I began to sit up.  "No," but I got a twitch in my back, and winced in pain._

_"Hey…take it easy.  I can't imagine this stage floor makes a very good mattress.  Here," he put his hand behind my back and gently guided me to my feet.  "Let me give you a hand."  _

_I stood up and shook my head a little—trying to get my bearings about me—and asked, "Where is everybody?"_

_"Well…sleeping beauty finally woke up," Eddie teased.  "Have a nice nap?"_

_"Mmmmm," I looked around and asked again, "Where did everyone go?"_

_"I imagine they went home," said Miss. Garber.  "School has been dismissed for almost twenty minutes now."_

_"Twenty minutes?"  I couldn't believe it._

_Apparently I had fallen asleep and Miss. Garber took that as a compliment to her relaxation exercises.  She had informed the class to leave quietly, and Eddie volunteered to stick around and wait for me to wake, just in case I needed a ride home.  He and Miss. Garber were still basking in the glow of the play's success so they didn't notice when Landon walked in and woke me, himself._

_I was quiet on the way home, I didn't really know what to say, plus I was still a little groggy.  I knew Landon was going to ask me why I fell asleep, but I just didn't know what I was going to tell him.  'Don't lie to him,' I told myself.  'Whatever you do, don't lie to him.  If he asks you, just tell the truth.'  Fortunately he didn't ask.  He just held onto my hand and drove, that's when I noticed the pile of books in the backseat of his car._

_"Boy, you must really have a lot of homework!"_

Jamie didn't show up at her locker after school, so I dumped my books in the backseat of my car and went looking for her.  I figured that the last person who saw her would be Miss Garber, although the woman could be a little air-headed sometimes and might not have paid that close attention.  When I got to the drama room though, I was treated with an interesting surprise – Jamie, asleep all by herself on the stage.

'Well,' I thought to myself.  'Perhaps I should wake her with a kiss.'  I promptly snapped out of it though.  I was no Prince Charming.

She woke up as I approached her though, so we didn't have too much of a problem.  Jamie seemed to have lost her sense of time during that little nap, and she wondered where everyone had disappeared off to before Miss Garber told her that school had been out for almost twenty minutes.  After a little trouble getting up off the stage, Jamie and I were headed back home in my car.  She was quiet most of the time, although she reacted with genuine surprise when she saw the stack of books on my backseat.

"Boy, you must really have a lot of homework!" she said to me.

I laughed, and then told her, "Naw, I just emptied out my locker since I didn't want to be around Dean and his crowd anymore.  Is it alright if I share yours until I talk to Kelly about getting another one?"

She thought about it for a little while, then replied, "Sure Landon.  I know we're technically not supposed to share lockers buuuuut… I don't think you'll steal my books or anything."  She smiled at me and nudged my elbow a bit when she said that.  "You'll just have to promise to remember which books are yours and which are mine, so we don't cause any problems at the end of the year."

As I turned the corner, my psych textbook flipped open and one of my worksheets fell to the floor of the car.  "Oh yeah," she added jokingly.  "You also wouldn't want to forget your homework because you took one of my books by accident."

I pulled up to the sidewalk in front of her house.  I didn't want to leave her yet, so I asked if I could stay and do some homework with her.

"Landon, you know you're not allowed in the house without my father here."

I had almost forgotten that the Reverend was usually at the church in the afternoons.  "Well… I can be a good boy and stay on the porch.  I won't cause any trouble, I promise."

"Alright," she said as we both got out of the car.  "You can set your stuff down there by the swing and I'll go inside to get us something to drink."

I smiled as I watched Jamie walk into her house.  Anyone passing by probably would have wondered why Landon Carter was standing on the local reverend's porch beaming like an idiot, but I didn't care.  If they didn't know by now that I was completely in love with the Reverend's daughter, they'd find out soon anyways.

I went inside and made a pitcher of iced tea and put it on a tray with two glasses, then I found some cookies and put that on there as well.  As I was walking back out to the porch I heard a voice, but I wasn't really sure who it was.  We weren't expecting any company and my father wasn't due to come home any time soon, so I was quite curious to see who it was that decided to pay us a visit.  When I looked out the screen door I noticed Landon talking, the only thing was, no one else was out there. 

_"Who are you talking to?"  I looked around the porch and set the tray down on the little table._

_"Ummm…" he had this look on his face like he got caught with his hand in the cookie jar.  "That was quick.  I thought you'd take longer."_

_"It's just iced tea and cookies," I looked at him again and asked, "Landon?  Who were you talking to?"_

_"Well…uh…nobody really…I was just sort of…ummm…" he lifted his eyes and looked right at me.  "I was just having a conversation."_

_"I saw that.  With who?"  The play was long over and as far as I knew he hadn't taken on any other acting roles._

_"Ummm…you.  See, I wanted to ask you to go out with me on Friday night to the high school carnival, so I thought I should practice first."  He looked like he had the first time he asked me out, a little giddy but mostly shy._

_"Oh. Good idea.   So what did I say?  Am I going?"  I was trying not to giggle, but he was just so cute._

_He rolled his eyes at me and grinned as he took a step towards me, "I don't know.  I hope so."_

_"Well I guess there's only one way for you to find out."  I took a step closer to him._

_"I guess so."  He took another step towards me.  When we were finally within reaching distance of each other, he put his hands on my upper arms and slowly ran them down to capture my fingers between his own.  "Jamie, would you go out with me on Friday night to the carnival?"_

_"I'd love to."  Now all I had to do was ask my dad._

Coming Soon:

Chapter 5


	5. Everything I Feel

The Lord's Plan 

By:  kf6tac (Brian) and Jamie Sommers

Email: kf6tac@yahoo.com

          Jamiesommers23@hotmail.com

Rated: PG-13

Synopsis:  This story is about Landon and Jamie's budding relationship.  They've had their first date; Landon has told her he loves her, now they have to face their friends, their family and their own fears.  Written from both Landon (**written in bold print by kf6tac/Brian**) and Jamie's (_written in italic print by Jamie Sommers_) POV.

Chapter 5:  Everything I Feel 

I was glad that Jamie wanted to go to the school carnival with me.  I personally had never been to one in my four years at Beaufort High School – I was usually out playing pranks on people with Dean.  I figured that it would be a fun event for Jamie and me to go to.  We spent the rest of the afternoon doing homework there on her porch.  Before we knew it, though, the sun was setting.  I knew her father would be home soon and I figured he might not be too happy that I was on his porch.

**"I'll pick you up tomorrow morning at the same time?" I asked Jamie as I gathered up my things.**

**"Yeah, I guess so," she said with a sigh.  She seemed a little bit… sad.**

**"Hey, cheer up!" I said to her.  "It's just another twelve hours or so before I'll be here to get you."**

**She smiled, and I leaned in to kiss her goodbye.  It started as just another innocent touching of our lips, but I didn't want to leave and apparently Jamie didn't want me to go either.  The kiss lingered for a moment, just the two of us not really doing anything.  I moved my right hand from hers to brush her hair away from her cheek, and I caressed her face as our kiss sped up just a bit.  My lips parted slightly against hers, but then that little voice in the back of my head chimed in.  'Watch yourself, Carter.  This isn't just any girl you're dealing with, it's Jamie Sullivan.  Don't over-do things.  You only had your first date two nights ago.  Don't rush into something you'll regret later.'**

**Reluctantly, I took my own advice and I broke the kiss.  I picked up my books and looked back at her, wishing I could stay longer.**

**"Have a good evening, Jamie.  Tell your father I said 'Hi'."**

**She smiled back as I walked down the steps of her porch.  "I will, Landon.  See you in the morning."**

**After starting up my car, I waved to her once more through the passenger window.  She waved back as she was shutting her front door, and I drove off with a smile on my face.**

_We spent the afternoon doing our homework together and while we were working on a few trigonometry problems, I realized something…Landon Carter is smart.  I mean REALLY smart.  I had pieces of scrap paper all over the place and he just looked at the problem and…and just…did it.  If he was trying to impress me…it worked._

_Before we knew it the sun was starting to go down and it was time to say goodnight.  _

"I'll pick you up tomorrow morning at the same time?" He started to gather up his things and I began wishing that he would stay with me until my father came home.  

"Yeah, I guess so."

_"Hey, cheer up!  It's just another twelve hours or so before I'll be here to get you." _

_'Twelve hours,' I smiled and thought, 'guess that's not so bad.'  _

_Our kiss goodbye started off like all the rest of our kisses, soft and simple, but then…Ahhh, he touched my face and I was lost.  Just the feel of his fingers brushing across my cheeks was enough to send shivers down my spine.  I could tell he didn't want it to end, that he wanted more.  He parted his lips a little and I could feel his breath turn to steam against my closed ones.  My father's thoughts popped into my head, 'boys like that have…expectations.'  Then he proved daddy wrong and pulled away.  When he did I immediately thought, 'God please forgive me.  Why couldn't he have proved daddy right?' _

_I could see the sun begin to set, the moon's outline was beginning to show and my father was going to be here any minute.  It was time for him to go._

_I watched him drive away and waved from my door, laying my head against it after it was closed.  Suddenly I felt this surge of loneliness that I had never felt in all my life, come over me and twelve hours seemed like a lifetime._

_'It's late Jamie.  Too late.  Don't call.  He only left here a few hours ago.'  I kept chiding myself the entire time I walked downstairs—in the dark—to get the cordless phone and bring it back up to my room.  I dialed his number and told myself once again that it was almost 11pm and it was exceptionally rude to be calling someone at that time of night.  'Okay…if he doesn't pick up the phone by the second ring I'll just hang up.'  But before the first ring even finished…_

_"Hello?"  _

_"Hello." I heard him catch his breath. _

** "Jamie???"**

**"Yeah.  Hi."**

**"Hi.  This is weird…I was just going to call you."  In fact my hand had already been on the phone when it rang.  Scared me half to death actually.**

_"You were?"  It kind of surprised me that I was on his mind that late at night.  I figured he would already be asleep._

_"Uh huh."_

**"Well it's a good thing you didn't.  My dad would've had a fit."**

**"Yeah, that's what I was telling myself too."**

**"So why were you going to call me?" She asked.**

**"I don't know…just to say goodnight, I guess.  Why'd you call me?"**

_I wanted to tell him,  'Because I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep unless I heard your voice,' but I didn't.  Instead I told him, "I miss you."_

"Oh," he was so quiet when he admitted, "I miss you too."

_"Is this stupid, Landon?  I mean...you just left here a few hours ago."_

_"No, it's not stupid."  His voice almost sounded like he was in pain. "I've been wanting to call you since I walked into my house tonight."_

"Isn't it funny how a few weeks ago neither one of us thought about the other person like this, and now…" I knew it wasn't fair to do, but…I was sort of fishing…you know…to see how long he'd been feeling this way.

****

"Actually," he confessed, "I was pretty much thinking about you all the time a few weeks ago too."

_"You were?"_

**"Yeah."**

**"Oh.  I didn't know.  I thought…"**

**"I know I was a jerk to you back then, but I never wanted to hurt you.  I could just kick myself for some of the things I said to you."  I could actually have done a lot more than kick myself.  From that minute she shut the door in my face, all I could think about was her and what a jerk I was.**

**"If it'll make you feel better, I was thinking about you all the time too."**

**"You were??"**

**"Uh, huh.  Even after you acted like a complete jerk to me."**

"I'm so sorry Jamie."

**"Landon, I was just teasing you.  Look it's in the past, okay?"**

**"Okay.  So…whatta ya doin'?" **

_We talked for almost two hours about…well about everything.  _

_"Do you remember the second grade?"_

_"Yeah.  You and I sat right next to each other."_

_"Did we ever talk to each other?"_

_"Nope.  Oh, wait a minute," he remembered.  "We did talk to each other.  Once I think, maybe twice.  I used up the last of my pencils and I asked you if I could borrow one."_

_I laughed at the memory and said, "If we only knew then what we know now."_

_"No kidding."_

**"…she spent almost an entire hour complaining about how you weren't supposed to kiss me in the play and that you thought you were, 'God's gift to women.'"**

**"If she only knew the truth."**

**"What truth?"**

**"About me being God's gift to women.  I'm far from it."  If I were God's gift to women… I could've at least been fair to Belinda when we broke up.  She wouldn't have been so angry, and she wouldn't be causing problems for Jamie and me now.**

"But, Landon…you're God's gift to _this_ woman."

"…then I told him, 'I thought I saw something in you.  Something good.  I was very wrong.' "  

_"Sounds like pretty sound advice to me."  I couldn't believe he used the same words on Eric that I used on him.  It made me feel like I actually had an impact on him.  'Well, you must've Jamie,' I thought, ' and he's obviously had one on you.  Why else would you be whispering to him on the phone in the middle of the night?'_

_"Yeah, I borrowed it from this girl I know."_

_"Do you think Eric'll come around?"_

_"I don't know.  I hope so."  He sounded so sad.  I hated the thought of him losing his friends because of me._

**"Landon, do you ever regret asking me out?"**

**"NO!  Absolutely not.  Look Jaime, like I told them, if they were my real friends then they would just accept us, but they didn't and I don't know if they ever will."**

**"I'm sorry Landon."**

**"Don't be.  They were helping me get nowhere fast and those aren't the kind of people I want to be surrounded by, okay?"  I remembered the night when we pulled that prank on Clay Gephardt.  Nope.  The only place they had gotten me was into a wrecked car and jail.**

**"Okay."**

**"As far as Eric goes…well, I'm still keeping my fingers crossed about him.  I think he'll come around…eventually.  He's not a bad guy, and he can still go on to do a lot if he just tries."**

_I had the phone propped between my head and my pillow.  My right arm was relaxed and lying above my head.  I kept thinking about Landon's kiss and his hand brushing the hair off of my cheek. Picturing his face in my mind, wondering what he was thinking. _

_"What're thinking about?" He asked me in a strangled whisper._

_"About you," I sighed.  _

**"What about me?"  I didn't realize that I qualified as 'thinking' material.  It seemed like most people in Beaufort didn't think much of me.  The way Jamie had said it though… so honestly and openly… I knew she really was.  It made me feel great.**

**"I was thinking about your kiss goodbye.  About the way you touched my face.  You always make me feel…pretty."**

**I could just picture her there, lying in her bedroom with the phone in her hands.  I didn't have to be there to feel the softness of her skin, to take in the scent of her hair.  I knew she was probably already in her pajamas, but that too was just another good thought.  Jamie never made a point of dressing to be flashy, and I knew that even in her pajamas she would be the beautiful, perfect woman she was.  I loved everything about Jamie – the way she walked, the way her hair fell so smoothly down her shoulders, the way her eyes twinkled when she smiled… the way she made me feel whenever we were together.  I missed her, and I wanted to be with her again.  Right that instant.  Even though I myself had said it wasn't all that long a few hours earlier, Tuesday morning felt like such a long ways off.  All I wanted was to be back with Jamie again, holding her hand and smiling with her.**

**"You are pretty."  **

**"No, I'm not."**

**"Jamie, you're beautiful."**

"Why is it every time you say that to me, I believe you?"

**"Probably because it's true.  You're the most beautiful woman I've ever laid my eyes on."**__

_"You make me feel beautiful."  My whole life my father always told me that beauty was in the eye of the beholder.  If this were true, then Landon wasn't lying when he said I was the most beautiful woman he's ever seen.  The way he looks at me…_

"I wish I could kiss you right now."  I would be okay, right?  I knew I couldn't let myself lose control… 

"So do I."  As much as I wished it, I knew it wouldn't have been a very smart idea.  I know I shouldn't be thinking about him kissing me this much.  It was a sin…or was it?  I just didn't know anymore.  I did know one thing, it was getting harder and harder for me to pull away, to keep our kisses chaste…to keep my head out of the clouds every time his lips touched mine.

_We were both quiet for a long time, and then Landon said, "It's almost 1:00am.  We should probably hang up."_

_"Probably," I said, not wanting to, but knowing it was for the best._

"See ya in a few hours."

**" 'kay.  Goodnight Landon."**

" G'night Jamie.  I love you."  Jamie didn't say it back that night on the phone, but I could hear her… _feel her smiling on the other end as we hung up.  It was enough to make me happy._

_" G'night Jamie.  I love you." He said it so softly that I could feel my chest tightening.  My stomach started to flutter and I couldn't help but smile as I felt a feeling of such complete and utter happiness wash over me.  _

_I wanted to say it too, 'I love you, Landon.'  Just to let him know that he wasn't in love all by himself and I wondered if he knew.  Did he know that whenever he walked into a room my heart would skip a beat?  Whenever he kissed me, I could feel it shooting through my whole body like electricity coursing through my veins.  When I looked at him the whole world seemed to stop, all my troubles just melted away.  I didn't feel sick when I was with him, I felt blessed, so blessed and I just kept wondering, 'do you know how much I love you, Landon?  You know…I think I can sleep now.'_

**The next morning, I stood once again at Jamie's front door waiting to take her to school.  Her father had answered when I rang the doorbell (again), but this time Jamie was passing by in the hallway behind him.**

**"Hey Landon, I'll be just a minute!" she called as she walked quickly up the stairs.**

**'Great,' I thought to myself.  Turning to her father, I asked him "And how are you this morning, Reverend?"**

**He looked at me for a minute, and I guess he decided he would take me seriously because he said to me, "I'm fine Mr. Carter, thank you."**

**There was an awkward silence before he spoke up again.  "I understand that you're planning to take my daughter to the school carnival this Friday."**

**I don't know what it was about the man that got me nervous whenever Jamie came up, but I was starting to sweat again.  "Yes sir," I replied.  "That is, if it's alright with you."**

**"Jamie asked me last night if it would be alright.  Just be sure to have her home by ten o'clock.  No later."**

**"Not a problem, sir."  We both heard Jamie's footsteps on the stairwell.  'Not a minute too soon,' I thought.**

**"Oh and Mr. Carter, one more thing," Reverend Sullivan said, turning back toward the door for a moment.  "Nothing funny on Friday night, you understand me?"**

**"Perfectly."**

**"Alright Landon, you ready to go?" Jamie asked as she reached the foot of the stairs.**

**"Yep.  Let's get a move-on."**

_I was running just a little late this morning.  I kinda overslept a bit, 'gee…I wonder why?'  I smiled at the memory of our phone call last night.  It was, up until that point, one of the most intimate moments of my life, and he wasn't even in the same room with me.  _

_I could hear my dad and him talking—not about what though—but I knew that daddy was probably grilling Landon about taking me out of Friday night.  I sighed and thought, 'fathers…'_

_"Alright Landon, you ready to go?" I raced down the stairs as quickly as I could without seeming too obvious; I needed to save Landon from my father's overprotective parenting._

_"Yep.  Let's get a move-on."_

_He opened the car door for me and then we drove off.  We got all of two blocks away from my house when he pulled the car abruptly to the side of the road._

_"Landon is everything all ri…" and then he kissed me.  It wasn't anything like the others we've shared before.  This one was hard and desperate.  His hands squeezed the sides of my head and his fingers dug into my hair as he kissed me over and over again.  I kept telling myself, 'you should stop him, Jamie.  This isn't right.'  But how could something that felt so good, be wrong?  I lifted my hands to his arms with every intention of pushing myself back but instead I pulled him closer.  He opened his lips again and I could feel his hesitation, but then he poked his tongue out of the corner of his mouth and licked my closed lips.  'Don't open your mouth Jamie.  If you do, you'll be sorry.  Just a little, I'll just open it a little…' his tongue flicked against mine and suddenly this hard and desperate kiss turned into a gentle, timid one.  I had to pull away.  It's not that he was pressuring me; it's just that I knew the only one that would stop it would be me, now if only I could muster up the courage to do that.  We both pulled apart at the same time.  Our breathing was a lot heavier than it had been a few seconds ago._

_He laid his forehead against mine and told me, "I've been dying to do that for weeks."_

_"You have?" _

_"Yeah."  _

_"We really shouldn't be kissing each other like that Landon."  I said it, but I didn't mean it._

_He brushed his lips against my cheeks and said, "I know I shouldn't have, but I just couldn't help it.  It's just so hard Jamie.  It's so hard to…" he kissed my other cheek, "…pull away from you."  _

_I didn't know what to say, so I didn't say anything.  I just closed my eyes and melted from the touch of his lips against my face.  He kissed me everywhere but on my mouth—my eyelids, the tip of my nose, my jaw.  When he reached my ear he whispered, "I'm sorry…just once, I promise.  It was just this once.  I'll try not to do this again."_

_He pulled back and looked at me, "Forgive me?"_

_"There's nothing to forgive."  We just sat there and looked at each other for a few seconds.  We both knew he would do everything in his power to try and keep that promise, but deep down inside we both wished he didn't have to._

**As soon as Jamie shut the door to the car on her side, we were off.  It's not that I was in a hurry to get away from her father, and we weren't late to school either.  It was just that since the phone conversation we had the night before, I couldn't get my mind off of her.  I had even dreamed about her.  She was so beautiful, so amazing.  All I wanted to do at that moment was…**

**I pulled the car to the side of the road a few blocks away from her house.  Jamie started to ask me if anything was wrong, but before she could finish I was already kissing her.  And not just another gentle peck on her lips.  This one was… something that had been building up inside of me for weeks – even before the play.  I cradled her face in both of my hands, running my fingers through her hair as I kissed her.  Our lips were locked, but even as I kissed her a part of me was screaming out, 'Landon, stop!  This is Jamie… you have to take your time with her.  Don't make her feel pressured.'  Even so, I parted my lips against hers.  I briefly thought about listening to that voice in my head… but then I flicked my tongue against her closed lips.  I felt her pull me in closer, and to my surprise she opened her lips just a little.  Our tongues touched just briefly, but when they did all the intensity and bottled-up desire I had been feeling just melted away.  The kiss slowed down, and slowly but surely I started coming back to reality.  Realizing that I had just spent the past several minutes pulled over to the side of the road, kissing Jamie, I started to pull away from her.  She apparently had a similar idea, as we mutually ended the kiss.**

**"I've been dying to do that for weeks," I told her.**

**"You have?"**

**"Yeah."**

**"We really shouldn't be kissing each other like that Landon," she said to me somewhat nervously.**

**"I know I shouldn't have," I replied, kissing her cheeks.  "But I couldn't help it.  It's just so hard Jamie.  It's so hard to pull away from you."**

**It was the truth, unfortunately.  Between her father and the others at school, it was like we were living under constant observation.  Even the smallest kisses, the shortest embrace, would be remembered by somebody and used against us later.  I just had so much love, desire, and passion for Jamie… and I wasn't allowed to get it out.  'Can't a man just have some time with the woman he loves?  Is that so much to ask?' I wondered.  But I guess for the time being it was, because we needed to get to school.  If I kept the car sitting there any longer we _would_ be late.**

**I promised Jamie that I would try really hard not to kiss her like I just had again.  I asked her to forgive me, but she said there was nothing to forgive.  I guess it wasn't all bad for her either…**

Coming soon…

Chapter 6


	6. On The Side of Angels

The Lord's Plan 

By:  kf6tac (Brian) and Jamie Sommers

Email: kf6tac@yahoo.com

          Jamiesommers23@hotmail.com

Rated: PG-13

Synopsis:  This story is about Landon and Jamie's budding relationship.  They've had their first date; Landon has told her he loves her, now they have to face their friends, their family and their own fears.  Written from both Landon (**written in bold print by kf6tac/Brian**) and Jamie's (_written in italic print by Jamie Sommers_) POV.

Chapter 6: On The Side Of Angels 

I have never in my entire life done half the things I've done this past week.  I am not the type of girl to worry about her hair, or her make-up.  What I was wearing or if I were pretty enough.  I usually went to the closet, grabbed something to wear, pulled my hair back and that was that.  So why every single article of clothing of mine was strewn across my bed was a total mystery to me.  

Everything I put on seemed wrong.  'Nope too plain, too dressy, too casual, not casual enough.  I had one pair of jeans and they were dirty, so those were out.  'Just throw on a skirt and shirt Jamie; this is getting to be ridiculous.  You're only going to the carnival with him.'  That's when memories of this past week and Landon started to flood my mind.

_That first day at school as Landon's girlfriend and the grief all of our friends gave us.  Finding a new place to eat lunch that second day, and getting Landon's stuff and my stuff situated in my locker.  We decided that we should just share 'til the end of the year.  We figure Principal Kelly's got enough on his mind to have to be bothered with something as trivial as a locker.  Besides, now we don't have to trek to different parts of the school to get our books between classes.  Weds morning I had a doctor's appointment so Landon couldn't pick me up, but he did take me home.  I also got a note from my doctor excusing me from gym class for the remainder of the school year, so now Landon and I had study hall together too.  _

_Landon's friends didn't really start anything with us after that first day, and Sally, well…she was coming around.  She still thought Landon was destined to hurt me and continued to tell me that she would be there for me when it was over.  The one that shocked me though, was Eddie Zimmerhoff.  I always knew he had a little crush on me so it kind of surprised me when he just accepted Landon and me without any hurt feelings or harsh words.  He always asked about him when I saw him and he usually took the time to talk to Landon for a few seconds after drama class.  They didn't really have much in common, but it was nice to see that someone was finally on our side.  I think Landon felt the same way too. _

_As I continued to throw clothes all over my room I heard the phone ring.  It was him._

_"Hi."_

_"Hi."_

_"Almost ready?"  I look around at the mess I've made and can feel the towel slipping off my wet head as I answer._

_"Uh huh."_

_" 'kay.  I should be there in about 30 minutes."_

_"Okay."  Thirty minutes. 'NO!!!  My hair was still wet.'  "See you then."_

_Don't ask me how I did it, but I did.  I dried my hair the best I could, threw on a skirt and shirt and grabbed a jacket.  I really didn't wear much makeup so I just swiped a blush brush across my cheeks for some color and started wadding up my clothes and shoving them back in my drawers telling myself that I would hang them up tomorrow._

**The rest of the week at school wasn't quite as rough as that first day had been.  After the confrontation in the cafeteria, Dean and everyone else just stayed out of our way, and we stayed out of theirs.  I was disappointed that Eric was still hanging out with Dean, but I told myself that I'd done all I could.  Eric had the right to choose who he wanted to hang out with, and if he wanted to stick with Dean then there was nothing I could do about it.  Jamie and I ended up deciding to just use her locker for the rest of the year; Principal Kelly probably didn't need me stirring up little problems for him anyways.  All of our teachers started being pretty nice to me, especially after I started sitting up front with Jamie whenever I had a class with her.  Jamie's friends in the drama department didn't let me off easy though.  Most of them at least.  Eddie Zimmerhoff was totally cool with the way things played out, but a lot of the other people from drama were suspicious of me.  To put it bluntly, I got the feeling that they thought I would break up with Jamie like I had broken up with Belinda.  I got a lot of strange looks and muffled greetings whenever I stopped by to get Jamie after school.  I tried not to let it bother me though; I figured they would all see soon enough just how serious about Jamie I really was.  How much I loved her.  How could they not see it, when it was the single thought that occupied my mind most of the day?  That's what I told myself anyways.**

**I called Jamie on Friday evening just before I left to pick her up for the carnival.  I was running a little bit late since I had run into a little clothing problem.  I realized after I had taken my shower that most of my laundry hadn't been taken care of for the week.  Now I knew it was just a little carnival, nothing fancy, but I think Jamie at least deserved to see me wearing clean clothes.  My choices eventually came down to my one clean T-shirt that I found and one of two pairs of jeans.  One pair of jeans was pretty old and had holes, so I chose the other pair… but when I started putting on the shirt I noticed some sort of mark across the front.  'Damn, can't wear this shirt either!' I thought to myself.  I realized that I seriously didn't have anything left though, so I took a chance and started scrubbing the thing right there at the bathroom sink.  The mark came out, but the shirt was all wet.  I looked at my watch and knew that Jamie would be calling me any time to find out what the heck was taking me so long.  I ran to my mom, who was sitting downstairs in the living room.**

**"Hey mom, I need your help real quick.  I had to rinse this shirt to get a mark off of it, and I was wondering if you wouldn't mind ironing it to get it dry while I called Jamie."**

**My mom looked at me, and I realized I was probably talking really fast.  "I'll help you out Landon, but you have to promise me that you'll _calm down," she said to me.  "There's no need to get all worked up about this."_**

**"I know, I know, mom.  Thanks."  I kissed her on the cheek as I raced back to call Jamie.  Fortunately I had half an hour, so when I got there to pick her up my shirt was dry and all was good.**

**When I got to Jamie's house, the door was answered once again by Reverend Sullivan.  'How does that man get to the door so fast?' I wondered when I saw him there.**

**"Landon, Jamie says she'll be down as soon as possible.  Why don't you come inside for a moment?"**

**This was weird.  Was Jamie's father being nice to me for once, or was he luring me into another tough situation?  Either way, I really wasn't certain I wanted to follow him inside.  "It's alright, sir, I wouldn't want to intrude…"**

**"That's fine, Mr. Carter, I can talk to you right here.  I just wanted to make sure you two stayed out of trouble tonight.  These carnivals… they can get pretty rowdy.  I don't want my daughter caught up in any of that, you understand?"**

**"Yes sir," I gulped.  He probably thought I was going to go out with Dean and make Jamie do something crazy like we had done with Clay.**

**"Good," he said, staring right at me.  "Now remember, ten o'clock."**

**I nodded as Jamie came down the stairs.  As soon as I saw her, I think I forgot that her father was standing there at the door.  She was beautiful.  I'm not sure if it was her outfit, her hair, or anything at all besides for her – but she seemed to walk with a certain glow about her, an aura.  She was… heavenly.**

****

I was so excited.  I had never been to a carnival before so thanks to Landon, this was another first for me.  All right, going to a carnival wasn't exactly on my list, but it should've been.  So I made it number 101 and crossed it off all on the same night.

_I couldn't believe all the cars that were there, we had to park over a block away and walk the rest of the distance to the school.  The closer we came to the school the noisier it got.  Children were running around and laughing, couples were holding hands, and everybody, absolutely everybody was smiling.  _

_The smell accosted me the moment we got to grounds, it was cotton candy and I made a mental reminder to try it out—another first.  '102 perhaps?'  _

_Men and women dressed in red and white striped smocks were calling out, trying to entice passers by to play their games._

_"Win the little lady a stuffed dog?"_

_"You look like you could toss this ball…"_

_"Step on up and throw the darts…"_

_The list was endless.  Landon went up to a booth and got a string of tickets, then took me to the first ride.  It was called a tilted whirl or something like that.  Ewww…it was sickening.  It went up and down in little waves while going round in a circle and each individual car spun like a top.  It was enough to make you sick.  I LOVED IT!  We laughed and rode just about everything there was to ride, saw just about everything there was to see and Landon even won me a stuffed bear by throwing a ball at a stack of bottles.  It was tiny and fit in the pocket of my coat, but I adored it just the same._

_We were getting hungry so he went to get us something to eat and as he was gone I looked at the one thing we had yet to try.  The ferris wheel.  I've seen them on TV and I've heard about them, but I had never been on one and all I could think was how beautiful everything must look from up there.  Now that **was on my list—number 74.**_

**I parked the car about a block out from the school because of all the cars that had showed up for the carnival.  Beaufort had gone all-out this year, and there was everything from the usual fun and games to some full-blown rides.  Jamie saw the ferris wheel before we were even through the gates, and I could tell she wanted to get in a ride on it before the night was over.  I made a note of it as I walked her into the carnival.  We were immediately swarmed by the sounds of children enjoying themselves and the smell of all those typical carnival foods: hot dogs, cotton candy, popcorn.  I looked over at Jamie, and she seemed so amazed by it all.  Almost like… a child's first time in a toy store.  The look on her face was so innocent, and so happy.  I remembered then that her father hadn't seemed all to enthusiastic about carnivals, and I figured she probably had never been to one in her life.**

**"Hey."**

**"Hey," she replied, still staring around at everything around her.**

**"So, uh, what do ya wanna do first?"**

**"I don't know Landon, there's so much to do!"**

**"I've got an idea, here come with me."  I took her hand and led her off to the nearest ride I could find.  'Might as well just make the rounds,' I thought to myself.  'This is going to be great!'**

**By eight that evening, we had gotten a taste of just about everything the carnival had to offer.  We went on the merry-go-round, walked through the fun house with its goofy mirrors, and saw the animals in the petting zoo.  I had even won Jamie a stuffed bear from one of those games where you try to knock over all the bottles with a baseball.  She just smiled and laughed the whole evening, and I was pretty sure I was smiling all night too.  We took a short dinner break, and I got us some hot dogs and a big cup of soda.  When I got back from the snack booth, Jamie was staring up at the ferris wheel again.**

**"So you wanna go on that after dinner?" I asked her.**

**"I'd love to Landon.  It looks like a lot of fun."**

**I put my hand on hers.  "When I'm with you, Jamie, life is a lot of fun."**

**She turned to me and smiled when she heard that, and she said to me, "I'm glad, Landon.  I have a lot of fun when I'm with you too.  Now how about passing me one of those hot dogs?"**

**After finishing up our hot dogs, we got in line for the ferris wheel.  It wasn't too long of a wait, but while we were standing in line we saw Dean, Tracy, Belinda, and some other guys I didn't recognize standing off toward the edge of the carnival.  Dean looked like he had some sort of bottle in his hand.  Probably a beer.**

**"I hope they don't go and do something dumb tonight," I said, partly to myself.**

**"What's that?"**

**"Oh, I was just lookin' over there at Dean.  Looks like they've found some new kids to take my place.  I just hope they don't make 'em jump into a shallow pool or climb a water tower somewhere."**

**"I know, I worry about them sometimes.  I'm just glad you don't do those things anymore."**

**It surprised me that Jamie worried about people like Dean and Belinda, but I know it shouldn't have shocked me.  Jamie was just that kind of person.  She was nice to everyone, even the ones who openly mocked her.  My thoughts were interrupted when Jamie pulled on my sleeve, telling me it was our turn.  The technician helped us into the ride, and up we went.**

_It was amazing.  We were going round and round, up and down and I swear you could see all of Beaufort from up there.  I was glad we waited to do this last because the lights were simply beautiful.  When the ride started coming to an end they stopped the cars and Landon and I were at the very top.  It was like we were just floating up there.  _

_"This is wonderful Landon," I knew I sounded excited, but I guess I didn't realize how excited I was._

_"You're cute, you know that?" He laughed._

_"Are you laughing at me?"  I couldn't seem to stop smiling._

_"No baby, I'm just happy."  He held his arms open and said, "Come here.  Let's do this the right way."_

_"The right way?" I asked and snuggled into his arms as the ride lurched us into the next waiting position, then the next…_

_"Yup.  This has gotta be the ultimate date ride.  Well, this and that boat that goes through the tunnels, but since I've never been on one of those, I guess this is it."_

_I nestled my head under his chin and asked, "Why is this the ultimate date ride?"_

_"Well," he looked around, "do you see room for anyone else in here?"_

_I shook my head 'no.' He leaned in and kissed me.  It was just a little brush of our lips, but he did this just as we got to the bottom of the ride and the technician opened our latch to let us out.  We stepped off the platform and held hands, "Thank you Landon," I said as I threw my arms around his neck._

_"For what?"_

_"For crossing off another thing from my list."  _

_"My pleasure." He squeezed me and lifted me off the ground then put me back down again and out of the corner of my eye I saw her.  Belinda was standing at the entrance to the building where the ladies room was located, just watching us and even from this far away I could tell she was crying._

_"Landon?  Could you excuse me please?  I've got to use the restroom."_

_"Oh, sure."_

_I made my way through the crowd and walked into the building, hoping that she was alone and wanting nothing more than to put an end to all of this--to help Landon get his friends back.  She was standing at the sink, looking in the mirror when I walked in.  She glanced at my reflection and I could tell she was trying to repair the damage to her make-up her tears had caused._

_"Belinda.  I'm sorry.  I never meant to hurt you."_

_She closed up her purse and looked right at me, "Don't flatter yourself.  Who said it was YOU that hurt me?"_

_She walked back out to the festivities with me a few feet behind her.  She stopped when she saw Landon waiting for me by the entrance to the building._

_"Jesus!  Can't she even go to the bathroom without you hanging all over her?"  She looked back and forth between the two of us and said, "You two are pathetic."_

_'Pathetic?' I thought.  'Oh, Belinda.  I really am sorry.'  _

_As I looked at Landon he was pursing his lips in thought and said, "Pathetic?  I can live with that."  His smile seemed to lift all of my guilty feelings away and we walked back to the fairway.  _

_"So what'd ya wanna do now?"_

_"Well, I promised my dad that I would stop by the pavilion and give his regards to Mr. Levy our choir director.  Do you mind?"_

_"Nope.  To the pavilion we go."_

_We walked completely across the carnival to the area the school had designated as "the pavilion."  It was actually part of the parking lot with a tent over the stage--a small platform that was raised about a foot off the ground-- and a spacious area for dancers.  _

_Just as we got to the end of the barricade we heard, "HEY!  Jamie!  Landon!"_

_"Clay!"_

_"Hey, man!" we both said at the same time._

_"Hey guys," he looked at us a little strange and I realized that he didn't know about us. _

_"When did you get out of the rehab center Clay?" I asked._

_"A few days ago. I don't have to go back to school 'til Monday though." He kept looking back and forth at us and gave me a little smile when he noticed that we were holding hands.  "Hey, Jamie.  I just wanted to say thanks."_

_"Oh, don't worry about it."  I was in the office one day when all of this stuff happened with Clay and overheard Principal Kelly talking with a few of the teachers, saying that unless Clay was able to make up all of his missed work there was no way he would be able to graduate with the rest of the senior class.  When I heard that I took it upon myself to bring Clay not only the homework we got assigned, but also went over the stuff we covered in classes too.  I visited him at least three times a week, but I still hadn't told Landon about it._

_"No.  I mean it.  If is wasn't for you I don't think I'd be graduating this year."_

_"Anytime." I looked at Landon and said, "This song is almost over so I'm gonna go say hi to Mr. Levy."  I looked back at Clay and said, "It's nice to have you back, Clay."_

_I knew Landon was wondering what Clay was talking about, and I could feel his curious stare piercing my back as I walked away._

**After Jamie had walked toward the pavilion, I turned back to Clay.  I hadn't seen him since I went to apologize to him at the rehab center, and I was glad he at least talked to me.**

**"So Landon, what's going on with you and Jamie?" he asked.  Having not been at school for a while, I figured he probably had heard nothing about what was happening.**

**"Actually… we're going out."**

**"What, like dating?"**

**"Yeah."**

**"Oh man, I never thought I'd see the day," he said.  "Landon Carter and Jamie Sullivan…. This isn't something that Dean and them put you up to is it?"  He sounded really concerned when he said that last sentence.**

**"No, it totally isn't.  Dean and I… well… we stopped talking about the same time Jamie and I got together."**

**"Man Landon, what happened to you?  It's like I'm out of the action for a few months and the whole social order falls apart!"**

**"Well… remember when you told me you didn't know why you had wanted to be my friend?" I asked him.**

**"Yeah."**

**"For awhile I wasn't sure why I would want to be my friend either.  That and Jamie came into my life."**

**I explained to him the whole thing, how I had been forced to tutor and be in the spring play after I got busted that night at the factory.  I told him about how I had asked Jamie for help on my lines and how awful I felt after the blowing her off in front of Dean and all the rest.  Then there was the whole mess with the fliers… after a couple of minutes of talking Clay and I were all caught up.  He was happy for Jamie and me, which wasn't something I was used to.  Pretty much the only person who took us seriously up to then was Eddie Zimmerhoff, so it was nice to have another person behind us.**

_I waited for the song to end and then I said hello to Mr. Levy._

_"Well Jamie!  This is a surprise."_

_"I just wanted to say hello.  My father sends his best."_

_"Why don't you come on up and join us for a song?"_

_I started to back off a bit saying "No.  I don't think so…" but he grabbed onto my arm and guided me to the microphone.  _

_He turned around to the rest of the band and said, "On The Side Of Angels."_

_I stood there at the microphone, trying to protest, but the music started and I knew the only way out of this situation was to sing the song.  I searched the crowd with my eyes, trying to find Landon, hoping that he would see me, but I couldn't find him.  There were just so many people.  I noticed his old group of friends standing off to the side as the music started.  I began to sing kind of softly when I saw Dean roll his eyes and say something to Belinda then the group of them looked at me and laughed.  'Landon.  Where are you?'_

**_I've never been so certain_**

**I've never been sure  
We're on the side of angels  
If we believe this love is pure  
  
**

**Is it so hard to trust it  
'Cause we've been wrong before?  
There comes a time in every life  
We find the heart we're waiting for**

I kept telling myself that the tremor in my voice and knots in my stomach was just nerves from the amount of people that were watching me, but somewhere deep inside I feared that this would be the last time I ever sang for a group of people in public.  I still didn't see Landon anywhere so I closed my eyes and began the chorus.

**After all the might-have-beens  
The close and distant calls  
After all the try-agains  
Don't be afraid to fall  
We're on the side of angels after all**

  
**I was getting ready to ask Clay about what he meant when he had thanked Jamie earlier, but before I could I heard someone behind me in the crowd say, "Hey look, that's Jamie Sullivan singing up there!"**

**I hadn't been too focused on the music before, but when I turned around and looked at the platform – sure enough, it was Jamie.  Her voice… it was so clear, so full of emotion.  I stood their, eyes fixed on her until I felt Clay put his hand on my shoulder.**

**"Don't just stand here, Landon," he said.  "Go on over there and support your lady."**

  
**Every time you touch me  
Don't you feel it too?  
The gentle hand that's guiding us  
You to me, me to you******

**  
**I began listening to the words I was singing finding new meaning in them and when I opened my eyes I saw him.  He weaved his way through the crowd of dancers, never once breaking eye contact with me, and I watched as the corners of his mouth lifted in a soft, loving smile.  He was standing right in front of me now, with this mesmerized expression upon his face.  The raised platform I was standing on enabled me to look directly into his eyes as I continued singing.  The crowd that had me nervous just a few minutes ago, now seemed to have faded into an abyss and the only two people left standing was Landon and myself.

**After all the might-have-beens  
The close and distant calls  
After all the try-agains  
Don't be afraid to fall  
We're on the side of angels after all**

**I stood there at the front of the crowd, watching Jamie sing.  It felt like the first time I had seen her sing "Only Hope" for the play, only this time I didn't have to wrestle with the feelings that were inside of me.  I knew I was in love with her, and every second that passed as she sang confirmed it.  Jamie Sullivan was amazing.  She was everything I had ever hoped for in life and more.  I felt like I was watching an angel sing on that stage, and the thing that made me the happiest was that she was mine.**

  
**Heaven only knows  
Why this took so long  
But only Heaven knows  
A love is right or wrong******

  
Suddenly this surge of energy coursed through my veins.  I lifted my hands towards the heavens and threw my head back and sang like I've never sung before.  I could feel the power of every note, every word from the deepest part of my soul and I knew he could feel it too.  

  
**After all the might-have-beens  
The close and distant calls  
After all the try-agains  
Don't be afraid to fall  
  
We're on the side of angels  
On the side of angels  
On the side of angels, after all  
Ohhhhhh, yeah  
On the side of angels  
**  
  
He raised his arms and lifted me off of the stage, crushing me to his chest.  We just held onto one another as the crowd applauded.  When the clapping ceased and the band started a new song he finally whispered into my hair, "I don't think I could ever love you more than I do right now.  You were amazing up there!  That was…wow…" he pulled back and I saw tears in his eyes, "Wow…" It was the most incredible feeling I've ever had in my life.

**After Jamie had finished singing, I took another step toward the stage and lifted her into my arms.  I held her close to me as the crowd cheered.  I was so proud of her.  I just wanted to hold her there forever, basking in the moment.  The band started to play another song, but all I could think about was the song my Jamie had just finished singing.  I whispered to her, as we stood there, "I don't think I could ever love you more than I do right now.  You were amazing up there!  That was … wow…" I was on the verge of tears when I pulled back and looked deep into her eyes.  "Wow…"**

**Even though I "officially" couldn't dance, we danced to a few more songs there in front of the stage.  Before I knew it ten o'clock was rapidly approaching.**

**"Hey baby, it's time to go.  We wouldn't want my car turning into a pumpkin halfway home."**

**She laughed when I said that, and replied to me, "Alright Landon.  But you know my father doesn't have that kind of power over you."**

**"Oh, no, but it's his connections I'm afraid of," I joked, looking up at the sky.  "That and… he ****can**** stop me from seeing you."**

**"You're right Landon, we need to go."**

**We said our goodbyes to most of the people around us, and walked back out to the car.  We drove back to her house mostly in silence, my right hand over her left.  I could tell she was pretty tired.  We'd had a pretty fun-filled night.**

**It was a few minutes to ten when I put my car into park in front of Jamie's house.  Just enough time for a kiss goodnight.  I walked her to her yard, and I turned to kiss her.**

**Just as our lips met, I heard the door open ….**

If you'd like to hear the song "On The Side Of Angels" Simply cut and paste the web address into your browser or click on the hyperlink.  Trust me…it's worth it!  

http://freepages.music.rootsweb.com/~blueyes/sideofangels.html  

Coming Soon….

Chapter 7


	7. A Moment In The Stars

The Lord's Plan 

By:  kf6tac (Brian) and Jamie Sommers

Email: kf6tac@yahoo.com

          Jamiesommers23@hotmail.com

Rated: PG-13

Synopsis:  This story is about Landon and Jamie's budding relationship.  They've had their first date; Landon has told her he loves her, now they have to face their friends, their family and their own fears.  Written from both Landon (**written in bold print by kf6tac/Brian**) and Jamie's (_written in italic print by Jamie Sommers_) POV.

Chapter 7:  A Moment in the Stars 

**Jamie and I both knew the moment we heard that door open who was there on the porch.  We immediately broke off the kiss, but I just stood there looking at her face.  I wasn't sure what to say or do.  I had gotten her there by ten o'clock as asked, but… well I had just gotten caught kissing her by her dad.  I knew I should do something other than stare at her, but to be honest I was too scared to look toward her father.**

**"Jamie, say good night to Mr. Carter," I heard Reverend Sullivan say from the porch.**

**He walked right over next to us and stared at me as he said, "Landon, go home.  The night's over."  I could tell he was angry.**

**I turned to Jamie, hoping she wouldn't see the embarrassment that was on my face and said, "Good night."  Looking briefly at Reverend Sullivan, I let out a quick "Good night, sir," as I walked away.**

**I was more upset with myself than anything as I walked away and got back into my car.  'Why, Landon?  Why did you have to pick that moment to kiss her?  Now her father thinks you're just some punk kid off the streets and you'll probably never get to see her again.'  I started the car and drove off.  I kept my fingers crossed that Reverend Sullivan would go easy on Jamie.  I didn't want to be the cause of trouble in her family.**

_It was a perfect night.  After I sang Landon sacrificed his pride by asking me to dance and I sacrificed my feet by saying 'yes.'  I didn't mind it when he stepped on my toes because he held me so tight…well…like I said it was a perfect night until…_

_Landon was walking me to my door and it just seemed so natural to lean in and kiss him goodnight, but we should've known better. Before the brief kiss ended my father was on his way down the stairs telling Landon to leave._

_"Landon, go home.  The night's over."_

_I was so embarrassed.  We weren't doing anything wrong all we did was kiss goodnight, but my father told me my behavior was "sinful," and that I was acting "childish."_

_"You're acting like…"_

_"Like I'm in love?" I interrupted.  I needed him to know that this wasn't just some schoolgirl crush.  This was the real thing.  "I love him."  It was the first time I said it out loud and it felt so good, so right.  _

_At that moment I was so incredibly happy, so in love that I was sure nothing could bring me down.    I was wrong. "Then be fair to him Jamie."_

_I went straight to my room when I got in my house and started hanging up all the clothes I had shoved in my drawers earlier.  I thought about calling him to apologize for my father's behavior, but I couldn't.  I just couldn't talk to him.  I was so ashamed of myself, my behavior.  I kept asking myself, 'why didn't you just tell him?'  There were so many opportunities, so many chances, but instead I just pushed my illness to the back of my mind.  I was being selfish.  All I wanted was to have a normal, healthy relationship with Landon, but that wasn't possible.  'He'll find out eventually, Jamie.  You can't hide this forever.'  I put my hand in my pocket and found the tiny stuffed bear he had won for me earlier in the night and I sat on the edge of my bed and cried myself to sleep all the while knowing that the end was coming.  I just didn't know which "end" scared me more--the end of my life or the end of my relationship with Landon._

**When I got home, my mom was up at the kitchen table working out some bills.  She looked up when she heard me walk in the door.**

**"Hi Landon, how was the carnival?"  My mom was usually pretty easy-going – she reminded me of a teenager sometimes.**

**I tried to hide my disappointment as I told her, "It was pretty fun."**

**As I walked toward my room, she called for me again.  "Oh, Landon, this came for you today!"**

**She handed me a big envelope, and in the upper left corner the words "International Star Registry" were printed in bold type.**

**Once I got up to my room, I opened the envelope carefully and took a look at what was inside.  All the documents and charts were there, so I put everything back in the envelope and put it in a safe place in my desk drawer.  I made a note to figure out some way to get together with Jamie and her telescope, but at the time I really needed to do laundry.  I lucked out when I found the jeans and shirt I wore to the carnival, but I would definitely have no clothes once those went into the hamper.  As I carried my clothes down the stairs and loaded them into the machine, I kicked myself over and over for giving Jamie that kiss.  I didn't really understand why her father had been so angry with me… I mean it had to be the kiss right?  I can't think of anything else I did wrong, she was home on time and everything.  And it was just a simple kiss too!  I started to get angry, partially with myself for letting us get caught and partially with Jamie's father for being so darn strict.  I mean, couldn't he even forgive something as simple as a kiss?  It was like I just wasn't good enough no matter how hard I tried.**

**'Calm down, Carter.  No one said this was going to be easy, remember?' I reminded myself.**

**No one said it would be easy… but I don't think I expected people to throw this many blocks in our way either.**

**After a night of troubled sleep and troubled thoughts, something finally started going my way.  Jamie called me late in the morning while her father was at the church.**

**"Hi Landon, it's Jamie."  She sounded kind of nervous, but who could blame her?  Her father would probably throw a fit if he knew she was calling me after last night.**

**"Hey, look, I'm sorry about last night…"**

**"It's alright Landon, my dad is just… a little overprotective."  She didn't sound so sure when she said it, but I took her word for it.**

**"Anyways Landon," Jamie continued, "I was wondering if you'd like to meet me in the cemetery later tonight."**

**"Well Jamie, what about your father?"**

**"Don't worry about him Landon, I just need to see you."  The uncertainty in her voice was starting to worry me, but I just told myself it was to be expected.  After all, here was Jamie Sullivan planning to meet with her boyfriend… the same boyfriend at whom her father was probably pretty angry.  It was probably the first time she was going behind her father's back on anything.**

**"Yeah, that sounds great!  Can we do some star-gazing too while we're there?"  This was perfect timing for me; Jamie was setting up an opportunity for me to show her what the Star Registry had mailed to me just the day before.**

**I thought I could feel her becoming more at ease on her end of the line when she said, "Yeah Landon, we can."**

**"Alright, I'll be there then.  About 9PM good for you?"**

**"That would be excellent.  I should get going now though, my father will probably be coming home soon."**

**"Okay.  And hey, Jamie…"**

**"Yes Landon?"**

**"I love you."**

**There was silence for a while on her end, and after a little bit of shuffling I heard her say, "I'll see you tonight."**

**"'kay, bye."**

**"Bye Landon."**

**I sighed while hanging up the phone, and suddenly a plan started to form.  As quickly as I could, I started going through all the encyclopedias, old astronomy books, anything I could find in the house… Yes, this still had the potential to be a great evening.**

I woke up sometime around 4:00 in the morning wearing the same clothes I wore to the carnival the night before—my stuffed bear still clutched in my hand.  I placed it in the corner of my bed and walked down the stairs.  Then I wrote a note for my dad and left it on the kitchen table. 

 Getting into my car, I had no idea where I was going, I just knew I needed to get away and think.  I wound up at the spot where Landon first kissed me, the spot where he first admitted his love to me.  I leaned over the wooden railing and inhaled deeply, taking in the scent of the salt water, letting it bring me back in time.

"I might kiss you."

"I might be bad at it."

"That's not possible."

To a moment of pure happiness, a moment of innocence.  When insecurities and uncertainty added up to sheer joy.  There was nothing in the world like the feeling of falling in love, and watching that love blossom into something more.  As I looked at the rising sun, I knew what I had to do and I wondered...had it only been a week since that first kiss? One week of holding hands, sneaking kisses, late night phone calls and bubbling laughter.  I hated the thought of our perfect little world coming to an end, but it would and in the process I knew I was going to lose the best thing that ever happened to me.

"Why did you show me how wonderful life could be just to take it away?"  It was the first time in my life that I had questioned God's plan.

"Jamie?  Is that you?"

"Yes daddy."

"I was starting to get worried.  It's mid-morning." 

"I left you a note on the table.  Didn't you see it?"

"Yes, but…"

"I wasn't with Landon daddy."  I knew I was being curt, but I couldn't seem to stop myself.

"I didn't say you were."

"Then why are you questioning me?  You never have before."  When I first built my telescope my father would take me to the cemetery at night to look at the stars, but as I got older, I went on my own and he never questioned why I would come home after the sun would rise.

"Well, you've never been out until," he looked at his watch, "9:30 in the morning before, so I got a little worried."

'Jamie,' I told myself, '**now** you're acting childish.'  "I'm sorry daddy.  I didn't mean…" I walked into his arms and cried for what seemed like the hundredth time in the past twelve hours.

"Jamie…" He didn't know what to say.  My father, the man that counseled couples in trouble, helped people through their times of suffering, had no words to offer me.

"It's okay daddy.  I'll be okay.  I've just got a lot on my mind."  I wiped my tears off on my sleeve and asked him with a forced smile, "Where are you off to?"

"Well I'm on my way to the church for a few hours then I need to go visit Mrs. Collingsworth—seems she's in the hospital again.  What're your plans for the day?"

"I've got some chores I need to get done, then I thought I would go to the cemetery tonight.  I thought it would help to clear my mind."  I started talking about little things, like laundry and breakfast and I even asked him to put my telescope in my car before he left, just to keep him from asking me the question I knew was on his mind.  'Will Landon be there?'  

The moment he left I picked up the phone and called Landon to ask him to meet me.

_"Alright, I'll be there then.  About 9PM good for you?" he asked._

_"That would be excellent.  I should get going now though, my father will probably be coming home soon."  I knew it was a lie, but I just couldn't talk to him without feelings of guilt consuming me._

_"Okay.  And hey, Jamie…"_

_"Yes Landon?"_

_"I love you."_

_I didn't know what to say.  I looked down at my feet and toed at a dust bunny that had formed around the leg of the table and said, "I'll see you tonight."  _****

**I spent the rest of the day flipping through reference books around the house, trying to figure out exactly what I wanted to do at the cemetery.  Jamie said we could do some stargazing, soooooo… after a lot of reading and digging, I found what I was looking for: Pluto.  Now that I had my plan pretty much built up, I just needed to make sure I had everything.  My laundry was already running, so clothes would be no problem.  Blankets?  We had plenty – I could just pull some extras out of the closet at the end of the hall.  Hmmm… what else?  Ah, we needed coffee.  At least I would need it.  I didn't know if Jamie drank coffee or not, but knowing me I'd probably fall asleep.**

**After dinner, I went into the kitchen and brewed up a lot of coffee.  Enough to fill a big thermos.  I packed everything into a cloth bag, and put it in the back of my car.  After folding up all my laundry, I picked out what I would be wearing for the night.  I eventually decided on a blue collared shirt and a pair of khakis.  Had to make up for the weird brown T-shirt I wore the night before, after all.  I took the papers from the Star Registry and put them into my shirt pocket.  A little before nine, I let my mom know I was on my way out.  I drove out to the cemetery, and I saw Jamie's car in the parking lot.  Instead of parking next to her car, I pulled my car onto the road leading into the cemetery.  I figured that my red Camaro was a little bit too conspicuous, and I wouldn't want someone calling the cops 'cause they thought Landon Carter was there knocking over headstones or something.  I also didn't want Reverend Sullivan driving by and seeing both of our cars parked right next to each other.  I knew Jamie had said she would take care of the father problem but… well, doesn't hurt to be safe right?**

**I pulled my car up to the spot where I was supposed to meet Jamie.  She was already there, unloading her telescope.  The car headlights lit her up, and she looked angelic.  She still had that glow about her, and no matter how many times I had seen her in the past week it always amazed me.  I got out of the car and walked towards her.**

**"Hey," I said to her as I kissed her quickly on the lips.**

**"Hey," she said back to me.  "Will you help me?" she asked, gesturing toward the disassembled telescope on the ground.**

**I picked up a few pieces, and we walked over to where Jamie had planned on putting the whole thing together.  I also grabbed the bag of stuff I had loaded into my car.**

**"So, uh, what did you tell your father?" I asked her.  I couldn't help it, I was curious to know exactly how she had gotten her father to agree to this.**

**"The truth..."**

**I was pleasantly surprised.  I had expected the Reverend to be hating my guts.**

**"… I just left you out of it."  Well, that explained it.  I smiled though, marveling at Jamie's way of telling the truth without getting to the touchy parts of it.**

As the day progressed so did my enthusiasm.  I kept telling myself that this wasn't going to be one of those fun filled evening with Landon.  That I needed to tell him the truth about my leukemia tonight.  'If the opportunity presents itself, you WILL tell him tonight.'

I could feel the excitement building up inside me at the anticipation of seeing Landon again.  I strode back and forth from my car to the spot where I usually set up my telescope and kept reminding myself that even though I was setting it up, I wasn't there to "stargaze" the night away.  I was there to tell Landon the truth.  I should be feeling nothing but dread at the thought of telling him.  'So why is my pulse racing, my palms sweating and my heart smiling?'  Simple…I was going to see Landon.  'No, Jamie.  You have to tell him.' But as he got out of his car and kissed me hello, I thought, 'tell him what?'

**After she had set up the telescope, Jamie turned to me.**

**"So what do you want to see?"**

**"Ummm… Pluto."**

**She looked at me kind of funny when I said it, and replied, "Umm, Pluto only rises a few minutes before the sun."**

**"Right," I said, standing up.  "And I have brought us a thermos… of hot coffee…" I pulled the thermos out of the bag, "and, a blanket."  I spread the blanket out on the ground and sat down, looking back up at Jamie.**

**"You planned this."  More of a statement than a question really.**

**"Oh, I'd hoped for it."**

**She smiled as she stood by her telescope.  "Are you trying to seduce me?" she asked.**

**"Why… are you seducible?"**

**She shook her head no.  "That's what I thought," I responded.  "Ergo, a second blanket: one for me, and one for you."**

**She smiled again at my pre-fabricated plan.  "Thank you."**

**I got back up off the blanket and walked over to Jamie.  I came up to her from behind, kissing her neck and putting my arms around her waist.  She giggled her response, and I stood back from her as I pulled a star chart out of my pocket.**

**"Can you find this star, right here?" I asked her, pointing to a star on the paper.**

**"Sure."**

**She searched the sky for a while, and then looked into the telescope.  As she was looking through the eyepiece of her telescope, she asked me, "So… why am I looking for this star?"**

**"Because I had it named for you."**

**She looked up at me, not quite sure I was talking about.  I waved the other piece of paper I had received in my hand.**

**"See, it's official.  It's from the International Star Registry."**

**Jamie walked quickly over to take a look – it almost seemed like she glided over, she did it so gracefully.  She had a huge smile on her face all the while.**

**"This is wonderful," she said, looking over the certificate from the International Star Registry.**

**She looked up at me again, and I'll never forget the words that she said next.**

**"I love you."**

"So what do you want to see?"  I asked.

"Ummm… Pluto."

 "Umm, Pluto only rises a few minutes before the sun."  I guess I just assumed he knew that, but maybe he didn't.

"Right and I have brought us a thermos… of hot coffee and a blanket."  I watched as he pulled everything out of his bag and sat contentedly on the blanket he had laid out.

"You planned this."  Funny, considering I was the one that asked him to meet me here tonight.

"Oh, I'd hoped for it."

Something dawned on me then, "Are you trying to seduce me?" Could Daddy have been right about him all along?

"Why… are you seducible?"

From the flirtatious tone in his voice and that playful gleam in his eyes, I knew my worries were for nothing.  So I shook my head 'no' and smiled at him.  Then he did the sweetest thing.

"That's what I thought.  Ergo, a second blanket: one for me, and one for you."

"Thank you." 

He got up and walked towards me, kissing me on the back of my shoulder and I thought, 'Thank goodness he brought that second blanket.'

I thought it a bit odd when he asked me to find a particular star so I asked him, "So… why am I looking for this star?"

"Because I had it named for you."  I couldn't believe it.  

"See, it's official.  It's from the International Star Registry." I went over to him to look at the piece of paper he had in his hand.

"This is wonderful," It couldn't be.  It just couldn't!  Without even knowing it, Landon Carter had just crossed off another thing on my life's "To Do" list.  

The feelings that were going through me at that moment couldn't be explained.  There was so much going through my head, so much he still didn't know and at that very moment I knew I had to tell him.

"I love you."

There was a magnetic force that just seemed to pull us together and when we kissed…  His lips were so soft…moist.  I could feel his hands, first one then the other cradling my face and holding me close.  We kissed like we had that morning he pulled over the car, but this time I had to end it.  There were just too many temptations for me.  Tonight was going to be the ultimate test of my beliefs, of my faith.

We sat down together on the blanket with me between his legs, my back pressed up against his chest and he asked me again, "So…what's your number one."  

This time I knew I could trust him with my answer.  "To marry in the church where my mother grew up.  Where my parents got married."  I felt him kiss me on the cheek as I snuggled closer to him and in my heart I prayed that he could make that one come true too.  We spent the next couple of hours talking about the moment that we realized we loved each other.  We wished on a shooting star.  We reminisced about our childhood and we kissed again.  This time I didn't stop it, he did.  We looked at my star and eventually I fell asleep in his arms.

I felt a flutter across my cheek, my forehead, my eyes, my nose, my mouth… "Landon." I whispered as he kissed me softly, waking me from my dreamless sleep.  We were lying on our sides, facing each other.  His fingers were running slowly up and down my arm.  His lips were a breath apart from mine.  I lifted my hand to his face and began tracing the outline of his eyebrows, his jaw.  I threaded my fingers through his hair as I brushed my lips against his.  He didn't move, it was like he was giving me liberty to do whatever I wanted, at whatever pace I wanted and I thought, 'Thank you.  Thank you for being patient with me, for loving me.'  I closed my lips against his, felt his hands creep up my spine holding me in place.  I kissed him again and could feel his fingers digging into my back.  'Jamie' I said to myself, 'why are you doing this to him?  This is wrong.  You're being sinful.'

"Jamie?" his voice was gravelly.

"Hmmmm?" I whispered against his lips.

"Please baby," he began to beg me, "please…" 

I kissed his jaw.  'Jamie,' I scolded myself, as I gently kissed the tip of his earlobe, 'what are you doing???'

"Please…" he inhaled deeply releasing his steamy breath into my hair. "Please stop.  I can't take much more of this." He pulled back to look into my eyes and said, "You may not be seducible, but I am."

**That night in the cemetery was one of the best nights of my life.  I'll never forget the moment Jamie told me she loved me – it seemed like the second I heard those words from her, my world was right.  She loved me back, and that was everything in the world I needed to survive.  I couldn't help but kiss her deeply, to let her know that I still loved her too.  The kiss got a little out of control, but Jamie stopped us before we did anything we would regret.**

**"Okay, okay, I'm stopping now," I had said when she began to murmur her protest.**

**We both sat down on the blankets I had spread out, my arms wrapped around her and with her body nestled comfortably against my legs.**

**"So… what's your number one?" I asked her.  It was the third time, and this time we both knew we loved each other.**

**She thought about it for a moment, and then she told me, "To marry in the church where my mother grew up.  Where my parents got married."**

**I pondered that one for a while.  It made sense to me, now that I knew Jamie for who she was, that to be married would be her biggest "to-do" item.  She was such a loving person, it would seem almost wrong for her to not want to get married and share that love with someone else.  Deep down inside, I hoped that lucky person would be me.**

**We spent the rest of the night on the blankets, waiting for Pluto to come up.  We talked about the past, about when we were kids.  It was kind of like that phone conversation we had, only this time it was in person.  We talked about love and when we knew this was love.  We even kissed again – but I knew I couldn't take it any farther than just kissing.  I loved her too much.**

**As the sunrise drew nearer, I noticed that Jamie had fallen asleep on my shoulder again.  I kissed her forehead and lightly shook her until she woke up.**

**"Hey baby.  I didn't want you to miss out on Pluto."**

**We both got back on our feet and headed over to her telescope.  She knew exactly where to look.  We both got a chance to have a glance at Pluto rising before the sunrise out-shined the planet.  Jamie took a few steps toward the horizon as the sun began to come up, lighting the sky up in shades of pink and red.**

**"Oh Landon," she said, turning back toward me.  "It's so beautiful…"**

**"Yes it is, Jamie," I replied, staring straight ahead to where she and the rising sun were.  "Yes, it's beautiful."  Although my eyes were fixed in front of me, I didn't know if I was talking about the sunrise as much as I was about Jamie.**

**I asked Jamie if she was going to disassemble the telescope, but she said that it was usually all right with the groundskeepers if she left it there during the day.  We packed up the blankets and the thermos, and we made some plans for the rest of the day.**

**"So uh, I'm guessing you'll still be at church today?" I asked her.  I already knew the answer though.  She was always there, singing in the choir.**

**"Mmmmm hmm.  You'll be there too right Landon?"  She looked at me, and when she looked at me that way I knew I couldn't say no.**

**"You bet.  We'd better get home.  I know I'll need some rest if I'm going to be awake."**

**I kissed her again, just a light brush of our lips before she walked back to her car in the front lot.  I pulled my car out and waved to her as we passed in the parking lot.  'Church…' I thought to myself.  'Landon, you're going to need a lot of sleep before Monday.'**

Coming soon…

Chapter 8

If you'd like to read more about Jamie and Landon's date in the cemetery check out Jamie Sommer's fanfic, "Starry, Starry Night" located at fanfiction.net.

www.fanfiction.net/read.p...yid=655110


	8. A Love Unconditional

The Lord's Plan 

By:  kf6tac (Brian) and Jamie Sommers

Email: kf6tac@yahoo.com

          Jamiesommers23@hotmail.com

Rated: PG-13

Synopsis:  This story is about Landon and Jamie's budding relationship.  They've had their first date; Landon has told her he loves her, now they have to face their friends, their family and their own fears.  Written from both Landon (**written in bold print by kf6tac/Brian**) and Jamie's (_written in italic print by Jamie Sommers_) POV.

Chapter 8:  A Love Unconditional 

**It was well into the morning when I got home.  My mom was already up, and I figured she'd be chiding me about getting to church pretty soon if I actually went to bed.  As I got out of my car, though, I saw that she was sitting at a table we had in the yard.  It didn't surprise me too much – my mom always loved being outside when the weather was nice.  I guess she's just an outgoing type of person.**

**I walked across our front porch toward the table my mom was sitting at.  She was reading something so she didn't notice me coming.**

**"HEY!" I said to her as I grabbed her by the shoulders.**

**She apparently didn't have any clue that I was approaching, because she jumped like she had just been snapped out of a different world.  I kissed her on the cheek as I went to sit down at the table.**

**"Did you just get in?" she asked, as I pulled out my chair.**

**"Yeah."  I didn't think she'd mind.  My mom was usually cool about letting me come and go as I pleased.**

**"Well thank Heavens I didn't know, I would've been panicked."**

**Maybe being out all night could be a little worrisome… I had never actually been out until morning before.  But hey, I came back all right.**

**She fidgeted with her glasses for a little bit, and then she looked at me really seriously.**

**"Landon, were you with Jamie?"**

**I didn't really know how to explain, so I just looked at her with this look that said, 'Yes.'**

**"Landon, be careful – she's the reverend's daughter!"**

**Yeah, I knew that.  But I knew that my mom was just worried because she too had heard about how I broke up with Belinda.**

**"Mom…"**

**"Please…" we said at the same time.**

**I shook my head really quickly.  "It's different with her, okay?"**

**"Different with her…" she repeated to me.  She looked like she didn't believe me.  'Come on mom, it's me.  Landon.  Am I really that hard to trust?'  I knew the answer though, so I didn't bother asking.**

**"Yes."  I was dead serious when I said it.  Things were different with Jamie.  Why?  Because I loved her.**

**"It'd better be different with her," my mom said to me.  She said it with a smile though, so I think she finally understood how I felt.**

**Then she changed the subject.  My mom was good at just jumping from one thing to the next.  I hoped it wasn't about my father…**

**"I was doing laundry the other day," she said as she reached to open her folder that was on the table.  "And I found this."**

**She pulled out a folded-up piece of paper.  I knew what it was almost immediately.  I lowered my head, sort of cradling it with one hand.  I must've left it by the machines on Friday night when I did my laundry…**

**"Examine a moon rock… go to college… get into medical school," she read from the paper.  It was my to-do list that I had made.  "Honey, these are really beautiful ambitions.  They're… but you're going to have to work really hard…"**

**She didn't think I could do it.  My own mother… I was disappointed, but I couldn't blame her.  I hadn't exactly kept my record clean for the first eighteen years of my life.**

**"I can do that."  I tried to put my whole heart into those four words, because I really wanted them to be true.**

**"Yeah, you can."  My mom seemed a little shocked that I was so driven.**

**"Momma… Jamie has… faith in me."  I remembered the night of our first date, while we were dancing.**

**_"Number one on my list is getting out of Beaufort."_**

**_"I don't think it's getting out is gonna be your problem.  It's more like figuring out what you're gonna do when you get somewhere," she had said to me._**

****

**_"What do you mean?"  I was pretty confused._**

****

**_"I mean you can do anything."_**

****

****

**That's when I realized that Jamie Sullivan had faith in me, Landon Carter, to do anything.  Of all the people in the world, she was one of the few who had ever told me I could be something more than just another high-school dropout working in a fast food joint.  It really made me re-think my life.**

**"You know?  She makes me want to be different… better."**

**My mom didn't say anything for a while.  She smiled though, and for a minute she seemed to have some sort of idea brewing.  Then she glanced at the time.**

**"Landon, we should get ready for church.  We wouldn't want to be late."**

_"Good morning Mrs. Otis.  How are you?"  My father and I began shaking hands with the parishioners as they made their way out of the church like we did every Sunday.  "Hello Mr. And Mrs. Dentch…Mrs. Clayton, nice to see you…Good morning Mr. Wallace…It's nice to see you Principal Kelly," I continued doing this along side my father until the last of the church members made their way to us.  "Good Morning Mrs. Carter," I shook her hand, "It's nice to see you.  Good morning Landon." He put his hand in mine like he was going to shake it and brought it up to his lips to place a kiss on my knuckles._

_"Good morning Miss. Sullivan.  You're looking lovely today…for a girl that didn't get too much sleep," he teased under his breath.  _

_The church was empty with the exception of the four of us.  Rays of sunshine were being filtered through the stained glass windows causing rainbows to form on the walls and floor.  The wooden pews gleamed as though they were just polished and the soft breeze filled the air with the scent of spring blossoms._

_"I love the church this time of," I said wistfully.  "It's so beautiful."  I had a thought.  I wasn't sure if Landon would go for it, but I figured, 'why not.'  "Landon?  Would you like to take a tour of the church with me? I have to put my choir robe away and there's so much more of it that you've never seen."_

_He just looked at me and smiled.  "I'd love to."_

_As I took his hand in mine my father said, "Jamie.  We really shouldn't keep these folks.  I'm sure they have plenty to do today and I do have to get to the hospital to visit with some of our less fortunate church members."  He looked at Landon's mom and said, "I'm sure you understand."_

_"Oh, certainly." She turned to Landon and myself and said, "So don't take too long you two--your father's got somewhere to be, Jamie." She winked at me and said, "As a matter of fact, why don't you spend the afternoon with us?  With your father having to go to the hospital it would be a shame for you to spend such a beautiful day all by yourself."  She turned towards my father and said, "Don't you think that's a good idea?  We could have a nice little picnic out by the water and…"_

_"Well, we wouldn't want to cause any trouble Mrs. Carter." My father interrupted._

_"Oh, it's no trouble at all." She said with the wave of her hand, "We'd be happy to have her over."_

_My father didn't really know what to say.  He just kept opening and closing his mouth like he was a fish or something._

_"Great!" she said.  "Then it's settled.  Landon you and Jamie go put her robe away while the reverend and I chat, then we'll get out of his hair."  She turned once again to my father and began...'chatting.'  "It's lovely weather we've been having lately isn't it, Reverend?"_

_"Yes it is Mrs. Carter."_

_"It's almost unseasonably warm out late…"  _

_I couldn't believe what I was seeing.  Not only did Landon's mom get my father to agree to letting me spend the day with them, she also kept him occupied while we went to the back of the church together.  _

_"Landon?" I whispered.  "Your mother is wonderful."_

**I was completely and utterly in shock as Jamie led me to the back of the church.  My mom was earning some serious "cool points" today.  After all, she had just gotten me another whole day to spend with Jamie.  Let me tell ya, it wasn't easy.  If I had been the one asking, I would've just given up.  Heck, Reverend Sullivan was doing everything short of saying "I don't want Jamie hanging around Landon" to change my mother's mind.  She stuck with it though, but I should've known my mom was a tough one to beat.  She even got the Reverend talking so I could look around the rest of the church with Jamie.  "Cool points" indeed.  I think about a million should do.**

**"Landon?"  Jamie whispered to me as we got into the back room where they kept all the church's supplies.  "Your mother is wonderful."**

**"She's a great one for sure.  She'll stick it out through anything."  'Including my dad leaving us,' I thought to myself.  But I didn't say that out loud.**

**"Just give me a minute here to put my robe away, and I'll show you everything that's back here."**

**The sun was shining through a window into the storage room, and it hit right in front of the closet where they kept the choir robes.  As Jamie walked over to the closet, the sun played off the white fabric and made it seem like she was sparkling, shining.  Just like an angel.  All I did was stare as she took off the robe and put it away, and she must've caught the look on my face when she turned around.**

**"Is everything alright Landon?" she asked.**

**"Yeah… it's just that… you're beautiful."**

**"Missing our days of play rehearsal, are we?"**

**"No, no… I mean it.  You amaze me, Jamie."**

**We heard my mom and her dad laugh, and then Jamie surprised me… she just walked right over to me, put one hand on the back of my neck, pulled me in, and kissed me.  It was less intense than the ones we had shared in the cemetery or in my car, but it was more than just a little peck.**

**"Thanks for the compliment," she said when we pulled apart.  "Come on.  Let me show you around."**

**She took me by the hand and led me through one of the side doors into a slightly darkened hallway.  She pointed to the first door we came to.**

**"Those are the offices… my dad has one, and the other one is for the choir's things."**

**We kept walking, and she stopped me again.  She pointed through an open door to a room with lots of windows and plenty of furniture.**

**"This," she said, "was an empty room when the building first became a church.  Over the years it's kind of become a tradition to be used in weddings by the groom and groomsmen to get ready."**

**"What about the bride?" I asked, noticing that the door didn't have a match on the other side of the hallway or anything.**

**"There's actually a whole separate bridal room outside, toward the back of the lot the church is on."**

**"That's very cool!  I'm glad you showed me."**

**"I thought you'd want to know what is back here.  I mean… so many amazing things go on back here that no one ever sees out in the church."**

**I realized she was talking about the prep room again, and about all the preparations that people go through for a wedding.  I think that's when I realized I wanted to make her number one come true.  The idea had definitely crossed my mind several times the night before in the cemetery, but when I listened to her talk with such wonder and awe about weddings and getting married… I knew it for sure.  I was going to marry Jamie Sullivan someday.**

_Landon's home was exquisite.  It was spacious and beautiful and homey and simply breathtaking.  I couldn't believe he actually lived in a home like this.  When we first pulled up I thought it looked so luxurious.  As you walked up the front porch there were stairs that led down the side onto a wooden deck that had a matching wooden table and chairs on it.  On the right hand side of his house he had a beautiful garden with every type of flower you could think of in full bloom.  To the left of his house was the harbor.  You could here the dinging of the buoys in the distance.  And surrounding his house was a beautiful wooded area; everywhere you looked there was another form of Mother Nature's mystical power showing.  Even the shrubbery was perfectly tended._

_"You have a beautiful home Landon."_

_"Thank you, but you haven't even seen it yet.  We're only halfway up the walk."_

_"Well, from what I see, it's lovely."  _

_"Well wait until you get inside.  You might think differently."_

_On the contrary the inside of his house was even more charming than the outside.  It was spacious and roomy.  There was a mixture of contemporary and classic furniture scattered throughout their home giving it a comfortable atmosphere.  I had never known anyone that lived in such plush surroundings.  _

_"Landon.  Why don't you take Jamie outside and show her around while I make lunch."_

_" 'kay mom."_

_He held onto my hand and led me out the front door onto their porch.  "So what'd ya wanna see?  The garden? Or the harbor?"_

_I looked between both places and decided on the garden first and the harbor last.  We walked through the garden on the narrow stone path and inhaled the mixture of wonderful aromas:  Jasmine, lilies, Tulips, Daffodils, tea roses, buttercups, blue bells… the list of flowers went on and on.  Landon reached down and absently picked a daisy and handed it to me.  _

_"Thank you."  I lifted it up to my nose to breathe in its soft scent when he placed his hand on my shoulder._

_"Jamie?"  I stopped walking.  I knew he was right behind me—I could feel him.  I turned around to look at him—his eyes so full of emotion._

_"Yes?"  I could feel my heart's pace gradually increasing, my breath quickening as he turned me into his arms.  _

_"I just wanted to say…" He looked down at his feet, like he was nervous about something.  "I wanted to tell you that…"  _

_"What is it Landon?"_

_He lifted his eyes to mine and said, "Thank you.  For everything.  For believing in me.  For having faith in me when no one else did.  For loving me and not being afraid to say it…to show it." He paused and held onto both of my hands saying in a hushed tone, "I love you."_

_"I love you too."  Oh, how I loved him.  I could honestly say that there was nothing and no one in this universe that I loved more and I knew right at that very moment that even if I had lived to be one hundred years old, I would always feel that very same way.  "I love you so much, Landon." _

_ We leaned in for a soft kiss just as his mother called us for lunch.  When we pulled apart he said, "My mom…she got a great disposition and lousy timing."  _

_As we walked back around the corner of his house we noticed his mother carrying a tray laden with lunchmeats, cheeses, fruits, a pitcher of lemonade and two glasses.  _

_"I thought since it was such a beautiful day, you'd like to eat outside."_

_I noticed there were only two place settings on the table and asked, "Aren't you joining us for lunch?"_

_"Actually…I have a ton of work I have to do, so I'm going to have to pass, but I'm sure my son will be more than happy to keep you company." She winked at him and turned to go back into the house.  "Oh…I also put a blanket in the shade over there," she gestured to the large tree that sat a few feet away from the water.  "Just in case you wanted to relax after lunch."  She waved her fingers over her turned shoulder and said, "Have fun you two."_

_As I turned to look at Landon he said, "You were right about my mom.  She is definitely wonderful."_

**Having Jamie visit for lunch was great.  I spent a lot of time at her house, but this was the first time in our eighteen years of knowing each other that she had actually come by my house.  Before we even made it to the front door, I could tell she was amazed.  She kept turning her head every which way, looking all around.  Now I'll admit that my mother and I lived in a slightly better neighborhood than most.  My father was pretty wealthy, and we as a result we ended up with a nice place to live.  I never thought much of it though, I mean it was a house… everyone else in Beaufort had one too.  I never looked at the houses in the other neighborhoods and marveled at how much better mine was, I just… well, I lived there and really that was it.  But Jamie kept telling me how I lived in such a wonderful house, even after she saw the inside (maybe my room might have changed her mind…).  It all just reminded me of what a sweet, innocent person Jamie was.  I couldn't help but smile the whole afternoon.**

**My mom apparently hadn't planned to join us for lunch after all, and she went in to get some work done soon after bringing us a tray of food and a pitcher of lemonade to enjoy in the yard.  'I seriously owe my mom for this,' I thought as I pulled out Jamie's chair and then took my place across from her at the table.  We talked some during lunch, about everything really.  We talked about school, church, music, our night in the cemetery, the stars… just everything we could think of.**

**After lunch we went down by the water to the tree where my mom had laid out a blanket for us.**

**"Just one blanket here, babe," I joked.  "Should I get another one?"**

**"No Landon, don't trouble yourself," she said, giggling.  "I trust you."**

**There was a brief silence as I took those words in.  'She trusts me….  She believes in me and she trusts me too,' I thought to myself.  'Thank you God, for this wonderful woman.'**

**We sat down next to each other on the blanket and looked out on the water.**

**"It must be so wonderful living here, to be surrounded by all this," Jamie said, gesturing at the open water and the trees all around.**

**"Yeah, it sure is somethin'.  I come out here a lot when I just need time alone.  Sometimes the boats coming in make a lot of noise though."**

**"Still… I think it's wonderful."**

**I lied back on the blanket, letting the sun warm me up.  Jamie followed quickly, resting her head on my shoulder.**

**"Landon?"**

**"Yes Jamie?"**

**"I love you."**

**"I love you too, Jamie."  I kept thinking about her number one.  'I'm going to make it come true for you Jamie,' I said to her in my mind.  'Just wait and see.'**

**When I looked down again, she had closed her eyes and was sleeping peacefully with her head still rested against me.  I kissed her hair gently, taking in the smell of flowers.  I closed my eyes too, and fell asleep next to Jamie as visions of her floated across my mind's eye.**

Lunch was wonderful and afterwards we walked down by the water to the tree where Landon's mother had laid a blanket for us.  I was having a hard time getting over how beautiful my surroundings were for the afternoon, and to think Landon lived here.  So many years I've known him, 'Ah, but Jamie,' I reminded myself, 'you never really knew him at all.'

Landon laid back on the blanket and I curled up into his arms, just relishing the warmth of the sun and of his body.  I could hear his heart beating beneath my ear; feel his breath in my hair.  

_I laid my hand over his heart and lifted my eyes towards his house to see his mother clearing away our lunch dishes.  We just looked at each other and spoke in that secret language that only women seem to know, with no words, just simple looks and gestures._

_'I love him Mrs. Carter,' I smiled._

_'I know you do,' she smiled back and went into the house carrying the tray of dirty dishes._

_"Landon?"_

_"Yes Jamie."_

_"I love you."_

_"I love you too."_

_I closed my eyes and fell asleep to the steady rhythm of his breathing and the thrumming of his heart._

_I opened my eyes what seemed like an instant later, to find that three hours had passed.  I was no longer lying in the crook of his arm but on my side with Landon spooned behind me.  His arms were wrapped around me and his head was tucked in the crook of my neck.  I could feel his breathing gradually changing and knew he was coming out of his deep sleep._

_"Landon?"_

_"Hmmmm?"_

_"This has been a perfect weekend."_

_"Yeah, it has been."_

_"I should probably go home and do some homework though.  My father wouldn't be too happy to know that I put it off until the last minute."_

_"What do you have left to do?"_

_"Just a few things for History and English Literature."_

_"So do it here.  I've got the same books and I do have paper and pens you know."_

_"Oh, Landon I should really get going…"_

_"Jamie," he pulled me closer to him and kissed the back of my hair. "I don't want you to leave yet.  Please don't go."_

_I left a few hours later when my father called to see if 'everything was all right.'  _

_"Guess that's a sign that it's time to call it a day, huh?" Landon asked._

_"I guess so."_

_He walked me to his car and stopped me before I got in and said, "I think I should probably get this out of the way now, so I won't be tempted when I walk you to your door."  He tilted his head down and kissed me gently on the lips and said, "Goodnight Jamie.  I had a great time."  _

_"So did I."  He opened the car door for me then drove me home.  Tonight when he walked me to my door he didn't kiss me, but he did squeeze my hand and said that he loved me._

_I watched him walk back to his car and waved at him as he drove off.  At that moment I knew that our carefree days were quickly coming to an end._

Coming soon…

Chapter 9


	9. I Wanna Be With You

The Lord's Plan 

By:  kf6tac (Brian) and Jamie Sommers

Email: kf6tac@yahoo.com

          Jamiesommers23@hotmail.com

Rated: PG-13

Synopsis:  This story is about Landon and Jamie's budding relationship.  They've had their first date; Landon has told her he loves her, now they have to face their friends, their family and their own fears.  Written from both Landon (**written in bold print by kf6tac/Brian**) and Jamie's (_written in italic print by Jamie Sommers_) POV.

Chapter 9:  I Wanna Be With You 

Last Sunday at Landon's was one of the best days of my life.  It seemed like every day I spent with him was one of the best days of my life, but when I got home that night I knew that things were going to be changing for the worse very soon.  My health was deteriorating.  I could feel it.  I was becoming unnaturally tired and my body would get twinges of pain more and more often.  I tried to forget about it all week long at school.  I tried to put the pain out of my mind when he hugged me a little too tightly, or when we sat in one position for too long, but it wasn't easy.  The burden of guilt was eating away at my insides.  It was time to tell him—it was just a matter of when.  

My decision to tell him finally came on that first day of spring break.

"Reverend Sullivan.  Jamie."  My father and I acknowledged my doctor with a nod, both of us afraid to speak.

"Your results came back and…"

"How bad is it Dr. Rosen?"

"It's not good, Jamie.  During your last round of blood work your white cells seemed to be maintaining their…"

I watched my father hang his head lower and lower as the doctor continued to tell me about my glum prognoses.  

When I had first found out about my leukemia I just assumed that the Lord would find a way to cure me.  I took it for granted that He would never take me away from my father.  When I found out that the treatments ceased to be working, I thought my world had crumbled.  I tried to be strong for my father's sake.  I tried to look at the positive side of life.  I made a list of things I wanted to accomplish and set out to do them.  If I hadn't gotten diagnosed with cancer then I probably wouldn't have done half the things on my list, right?  No matter how much I told myself that this was what God had intended for my life I still couldn't accept it.  I couldn't be dying.  

One day though…I was getting ready for bed at my vanity table when I noticed my reflection.  I was young…so young.  I didn't understand why this was happening to me.  Why God had decided to put me through this.  But I believed in the Lord and I believed in His plan for me, no matter where it took me.  I knew God had a reason.  I just hadn't figured it out yet.  I wiped the tears from my eyes and looked in the mirror again, this time I looked past my face…past my youth…my questions and searched my heart for the answers that were there all along: It didn't matter how **long I lived my life, but ****how I lived it and I knew I had lived it the best I could.  I never questioned God's choice for me after that… until He gave me Landon.**

**The coming Friday was our first day of spring break.  It was kind of a relief to me actually; I really needed a week of not having to go to school and do homework and everything else.  I figured it would be a good opportunity to go out and have some fun with Jamie.**

**As I pulled my car up to the front of her house to drop her off after school on Friday, I asked her if she wanted to get together with me later in the evening.**

**"So, uh, it's spring break now… you wanna go out tonight, maybe catch a movie or somethin'?"**

**She seemed hesitant for a moment, almost like she was when I asked her out to our first date.  Then she answered, "Well… I have some things I need to do in the afternoon, so how about I just meet you in town in the evening?  Around eight maybe?"**

**"Yeah, that sounds great to me.  It'll give me some time to pick up my room anyways… my mom has been buggin' me about it all week."**

**She laughed a little bit, but something didn't feel all there.  I figured she was just tired though, our teachers had given us a lot of homework during our last week before spring break.  Seemed to be a teacher thing.  I really didn't get it.**

**I kissed her on the cheek and sent her on her way back home.  I pulled away from the curb and headed home, wondering what we could do when we went out.**

** "Well isn't this a surprise?"**

**I looked up and saw my mom grinning at me from my door.  She had just walked in on me cleaning up my room… in fact I had just plugged in the vacuum cleaner to vacuum my carpet.**

**"What, does a guy need a reason to clean his room?"**

**"I don't know about other guys, but it seems like Landon Carter usually does.  Or did it just get too messy for you to stand?"  She was on to me.  Might as well just give up the innocent-kid-cleaning-his-room routine.**

**"Actually… I was planning on going out with Jamie tonight."**

**"Soooo you thought you should clean up your room so I couldn't hold it against you, right?"**

**"Yeah, something like that," I chuckled.**

**"Well I'll let you get to it.  No way I'm going to argue _against my son cleaning his room.  That Jamie sure is something… I could never get you to clean you room without poking and prodding every step of the way!"_**

**"Yeah, she's wonderful."**

**"I know, Landon."**

**My mom shut the door and I fired up the vacuum cleaner.  I looked up at the clock on my desk, but eight o'clock just wasn't coming fast enough.  'Just two hours more,' I told myself.**

**I met Jamie in town, as planned, at 8PM.  She was a little bit late pulling up, but it wasn't anything I was about to hold a grudge over.  Traffic lights were stubborn – it happened to me all the time.  She was bundled up in a big jacket, which kind of surprised me.  The weather was still pretty nice, and even at night it wasn't too cold.**

**"Hey," I said as I approached her.  I gave her a kiss, and then asked, "Have you eaten yet?"**

**She shook her head 'no.'**

**"I haven't either," I said.  "Let's go get something."**

**We ate in a little coffee shop/diner that wasn't far away.  Jamie seemed to only have taken a few bites of her food by the time I was done.  "I'm not really that hungry," she explained to me.**

**"Alright, but don't be starving yourself, okay?"  I said to her.**

**After we left the diner, we walked down the street.  I was holding her hand like usual, but something was off… missing.  Jamie, who always seemed so full of life, was acting very nervous that night.  It was actually worse than our first day at school after our date.  She was just kind of distant; we didn't really talk at all as we walked.  Before I could ask her about it, though, we passed by this club where I used to hang out with Dean, Eric, and everyone else who was "cool."  They must've been there tonight, because Tracy and Belinda were just on their way out the door.  They stopped and so did we, and they just kind of stared at us for awhile.  They kept right on walking without saying a word.**

**"That's great.  From citizen high to citizen low," I said to Jamie.**

**'Don't hold it against them Landon, they're just confused people,' I expected Jamie to say.  But she didn't say anything at all.  She just kept looking away.**

**"You worried about your college applications?"  I asked, perplexed by her behavior.**

**She shook her head.  "I'm not applying to college," she said after some thought.  We turned and walked down a small side street.**

**Her answer had me really confused.  Jamie was so smart… she could definitely be the valedictorian this year.  Why wouldn't she apply to college?  "I thought you said…"**

**"No," she cut me off.  "You assumed."**

**Then I remembered that item on her to-do list about the Peace Corps.  "You gonna take a year off, try the Peace Corps thing?"  It seemed reasonable to me.  Where else would she be going?**

**"No."  It was all she said, and she kept walking without looking at me.**

**I stopped, but she kept going.  "Hey."  She turned around.  "What're you gonna do?"**

**There was silence for a while, and then she looked up at me.  "I'm sick."**

**I felt bad for grilling her with all my questions; I should've known she wasn't feeling well.  That would explain the big jacket too.**

**"I'll take you home, you'll be better tomorrow," I started to say.**

**She cut me off again, before I had finished my thought.  "No, no, Landon!  I'm sick."**

**I just stared at her, not really understanding what was going on.  I mean… she had told me she was sick just a few seconds ago.  I obviously heard her, because I had offered to take her home.**

**And then it hit me, and I felt this gut-wrenching feeling in my stomach.  Her next words made me feel like someone had just taken a baseball bat to my head.**

_"I have leukemia."  Those were the hardest words I've ever had to say in my life.  We stood there fighting back tears—Landon trying to digest what I had just dumped on him—tripping over his own words.  _

_"No…you're eight... you're eighteen. You... you're perfect." He had this look on his face like he just didn't believe me, like I was playing some kind of prank on him.  I had to stop him from denying it.  
  
_

_"No, I found out 2 years ago and I've stopped responding to treatments."  I knew what was coming next and I couldn't blame him for asking.  
  
_

_"So why didn't you tell me?"   
  
_

_I tried to explain my reasons.  "The doctor said I should go on and live life normally as best I could. I didn't want anybody to be weird around me."  
  
_

_"Including me?!"  
  
_

_"Especially you!  You know I was getting along with everything just fine. I  
accepted it, and then you happened. I do not need a reason to be angry with   
God."  I ran.  I couldn't look at him any longer.  I couldn't stand there waiting for the inevitable to come.  I could hear his unspoken words running through my head as I raced to my car. 'Look Jamie, it's been fun, but maybe we should stop seeing each other,' and they repeated in my mind over and over again the closer I got to home._

_"Jamie, you're back early.  Jamie?  What's wrong?  What happened?  Did Landon try something…"_

_"No daddy.  No.  It's not…huuuh…huuuuh…I…cahhhnt breeeeeathe."_

_"Sit down!  Sit down!"_

_My father ran for the phone—I knew he was going to call an ambulance—thinking that I had a relapse.  _

_"Ihhhht's not…not…" I reached out and put my hand over my fathers and squeezed it.  He looked down at me as reality finally struck._

_"You told him."_

_All I could do was nod._

_"Oh, Jamie."  He knelt before me and held me while I cried on his shoulder.  I told him everything that had happened._

_"So you just left him standing there?"_

_I nodded 'yes.'_

_He blew out a breath.  "Jamie…" He shook his head and held me to his chest.  _

_"I don't understand daddy?  Why did God do this to me?  How could he show me love like this and then take it away when I need it the most?"_

_"I don't know Jamie."  _

_I began to rock back and forth in my father's arms.  "I hurt Landon so badly daddy.  I don't think I'll ever forgive myself for that."_

_"Shhhh."_

_"I love him so much daddy.  So much." My words were running over my father's._

_"I know Jamie.  I know," he consoled._

_"But the worst part," I pulled back to look into my father's eyes. "I used to think that nothing could be worse than death, but I was wrong.  The thought of living without him—even for a day—is so much worse than death.  It's so much worse…"  _

**Jamie turned and ran.  My heart was screaming, 'Jamie, wait, don't go!!!'  But I couldn't get the words out.  I just stood there in shock, not sure what to do or think.  I was sad, shocked, hurt, and angry all at the same time.  I stormed to my car and just drove.  For a while I wasn't sure where I was going.  I just drove, and I was angry.  Angry at Jamie for not telling me.  But that passed soon, and it was replaced by a new anger… anger that this would happen to her.**

**I realized I couldn't drive all night, so I took a shot in the dark and drove to my father's house.  He was a doctor, right?  I couldn't remember what kind of doctor he was, I wasn't old enough to really understand when he left and I never listened to my mother now when she talked about him… he had to be able to help, he just _had_ to.  When I pulled up to his house, all the lights were out.  I walked up and pounded on the door.**

**"Dad, open the door!"  I yelled, apparently at no one.**

**I turned to walk away, and then I heard the door open.  'You always wanted to be a part of my life, now's your chance to redeem yourself,' I thought.**

**"Landon?"**

**"I need your help," I stammered out.**

**"What's wrong?  Are you okay?"  Yeah, yeah, now is _not_ the time for the protective daddy routine.**

**"It's my girlfriend, Jamie she's…" I could barely speak; it hurt me to think of it.**

**My dad just stared at me blankly, and I knew I had to say it.**

**"She's got cancer, okay?  And I need you to come and see her right now."**

**'Please don't make me beg,' I thought.  'I just need you to help me.'**

**"Okay.  Will you calm down…" There he went, stalling again.  Don't tell me…**

**"Can you help me, or not?!?"  I didn't have time for this.  I needed someone who would help.**

**"I don't… I don't know her case, I don't know her history.  I'd have to talk to her physician… I'm a cardiologist, I can't…"**

**'So you can't help me,' I thought.**

**"No," I shook my head.  "I knew it."**

**As I walked back to my car, I could hear his voice behind me calling out "Wait, Landon, wait!"  I didn't care to wait.  He couldn't help me, and I don't know who else in this world could.**

**I drove around a lot more that night, not knowing what else to do.  I didn't stay angry with Jamie for not telling me, because she was right.  Much as I hated to admit it, I wasn't the type who would've taken it well… I could barely handle it as it was.  As I drove, I started to cry… at first they were angry tears, for what was being taken away from me.  Then I thought about Jamie, and I cried again for all that she would miss out on.  After those tears had stopped, I wondered what I was going to do now… I didn't think I could stand to just be with her and watch her die.  And I cried some more.**

**I opened my swollen eyelids to the glaring sun that streamed through the window.  I stretched and felt pain shooting throughout my body. Catching my breath, I closed my eyes again and thought back to last night.  Finally telling Landon the truth.  Sitting up with my father and crying until the wee hours of the morning.  Feeling like the rug had been pulled out from under me once again.  **

**I walked upstairs to my room to get some clothes and made my way to the shower.  I told myself that I had to eat something, 'after your shower,' but I knew I wouldn't be able to keep it down.  I walked into the bathroom and turned it on to let it warm up, then began removing my clothes.  I crossed my arms in front of me and grabbed the hem of my shirt to pull it over my head when I caught a glimpse of my reflection.  My eyes were red and swollen, my cheeks were streaked with dried tears, my nose was red, my stomach was churning, my head was swimming and my heart was breaking.  I looked exactly how I felt.  At that moment I wanted nothing more than to shut off the shower and call my best friend, the only problem was…I lost him last night.  __**

**I finally pulled into my driveway early in the morning, about an hour before sunrise.  My mom was up already; I don't know if she had been up all night or what.  I didn't go inside the house though.  I walked down by the water, where Jamie and I had taken our naps the weekend before.  I stood there for a long time, almost until the sun came up, wondering what to do.  I didn't even hear anyone coming until he spoke up.**

**"Hey."  It was Eric.  "Your mom called me.  Talk to me man."**

**Did he know?  Or was he just here to settle this friendship thing?  I had much bigger things to deal with at the moment…**

**"About what?"**

**"About you.  About Jamie."  From the tone of his voice, I figured he knew.  My dad probably told my mom after I left.**

**"What's there to talk about?  She's the best person I've ever known."**

**Eric was silent for a while before saying, "I didn't understand."**

**'I know,' I thought.  'But it's all right.  You're trying.'**

**"It's okay, man."  I looked over at him for the first time in weeks.  "It's okay."**

**We did our handshake, and I realized it had been even longer since we had done that.  I was glad he came though.  I felt like I had my best friend back.**

**After Eric left, I stayed out by the water and watched the sunrise.  I remembered watching the sunrise with Jamie after our night in the cemetery, and I wondered what in the world I was going to do.  Could I leave her now?  The very thought caused my throat to tighten up and my eyes to tear up, and my heart screamed "NO!!!" to me.  So I couldn't leave her.  But how… how could anyone just keep on going like this was normal?**

**Then I remembered what I had said that day in English class.  **

**_"She's saying that regardless of her ploy to bring them together, they still would've gotten together. They would've found each other in spite of her actions, not because of them. Ya see, once they let their walls down they were able to see each other and all it took was for them to look…to really look at one another, to realize that there was something more between them…something special…beautiful. That they loved each other and the love they found is what'll help them to overcome every obstacle they face in life. That they can make it through anything as long as they face it together. And that nothing will ever break them apart as long as they hold onto that love."_****__**

**Every obstacle.  I had meant that message for Jamie when I said it in class… did I know what I was talking about?  Was I throwing myself into something… I wasn't ready for?  I sat for there, trying to straighten things out.  Finally I came to a decision.**

**'Ready for it or not, I'm not leaving her,' I concluded.  'I'm nothing without her.  She is my everything.'**

_"Jamie?  Where are you heading off to?"_

_"I need to get out of here for a while daddy.  I just need to…I don't know."_

_My father hugged me and kissed my forehead, "Take all the time you need.  I'll be here when you get home."_

_Neither my father nor myself thought it would be too smart for me to drive anywhere in my condition, so I walked.  I wasn't going anywhere in particular, but I found myself ringing Sally's doorbell.  I watched her walk towards me through the screen door and saw her face gradually changing the closer she got to me._

_'She knew.'_

_"Jamie," she opened the door and didn't quite look me in the face._

_"Hi.  Can we talk?"_

_She threw her arms around me and began apologizing for her behavior these past few weeks.  "I'm so sorry.  I should've never treated you and Landon so badly."  We talked for a while about my leukemia, about it's progression and we cried a lot.  _

_I wondered how she knew before I got to her house.  Had she spoken to Landon?  But she had heard about it from Eddie Zimmerhoff, who had heard it from Robin, who had heard it from Eric's sister, who had heard it…the list was endless.  _

_"So how is Landon taking this?  He must be horrified," she began crying again and grabbed a handful of tissues from the box._

_"I guess.  I wouldn't know."_

_"What?"  She looked at me like I had two heads._

_"I said I wouldn't know how he's handling it."_

_"Why not?"_

_"Because we broke up last night."  Saying that out loud sounded so wrong._

_"Oh, Jamie. I can't believe he would dump you at a time like this."  She didn't say it like she was disappointed in him; she said it as though she were truly in disbelief.  "He loves you.  I mean it's so obvious how much he loves you.  No.  There must be some mistake.  I just can't believe he would break up with you.  Especially now.  What did he say?"_

_"Well nothing actually…" I spent the next hour explaining to her what happened last night._

_"Oh, Jamie you have to talk to him.  He must be heartbroken.  Call him."_

_I shook my head, 'no.'_

_"You have to," she walked over to the phone and began dialing.  I wanted to reach out and slam the phone down on the receiver, but even more than that, I wanted to hear his voice on the other end of the line.  "Here," she made to hand me the phone. "It's ringing."_

_I just stood there and looked at it.  We both heard Mrs. Carter's voice saying "Hello?  Hello??"_

_"Uh, hi Mrs. Carter.  This is Sally; I did the play with Landon.  I was wondering…could I talk to him?"_

_"I'm sorry Sally, he's not here."_

_"Oh.  Do you know where he went?"_

_"No.  He just said he needed to do some shopping and left, but if you do see him…please tell him to call home."_

_"I will Mrs. Carter.  Thank you."_

_"So what did she say?" I asked._

_Sally gave me a look of pity and said, "He went shopping."_

_I suddenly felt like I had that day at the lockers when he mocked me in front of his friends.  Shocked that he was capable of doing something so…cold.  I shook my head trying to clear it and said goodbye to Sally._

**I got maybe an hour or two of sleep that morning before I was up again.  Sleeping was not what I wanted to do at that time.  I got dressed and told my mom I was going shopping, then I got into my car and left.  I also had to stop off at the bank – I didn't exactly have a lot of cash on me.  Not enough to buy what I was looking for anyways.**

**As I was driving down the road, I suddenly decided to pull off… into the church parking lot.  There were no other cars there, so I figured all the doors would be locked.  I walked around the main building and into the back, where Jamie had told me there was a separate unit for the bride during wedding ceremonies.  The building was smaller than the church, and shorter, but it was pretty kept-up and had flowers leading up to it.  I sat down on the steps at the door, and I'm not sure what prompted me to do it but I started talking to God.  It was the first time in my life I could remember having a serious conversation with Him.**

**"I know I don't pray as often as I should, Lord… but I'm asking for Your help now.  Please Lord, please just let Jamie stay.  I love her, and it's all because You brought her into my life.  I'm sorry I didn't recognize the gift that was right there in front of me all these years… please, just let me love her and hold her.  If I could only ask one thing of You, Lord, in all my life… this would be it.  Just Jamie."**

**I sat there a little while more, thinking again about Jamie's number one.  I realized it then that sometime in the past week, it had become my number one as well.  But would we ever fulfill our mutual number one?  I looked behind me at the bride's chambers, and I decided right there that I would do everything in my power to make it happen.**

**I got back into the car and drove to the flower shop.  When I told the salesperson what I needed, she looked at me kind of funny and asked, "What, are ya decorating for a garden party or somethin'?"**

**I shook my head.  "No, they're for my girlfriend."**

**"All of 'em huh?  Lucky gal…"**

**'If you only knew,' I thought.  I let out a sigh, and the woman in the store realized that things weren't all good and sunny in my world.  She helped me load the flowers into my car, and then I was off again.  I got to Jamie's house and started laying the pots of flowers on the porch.  I set the bouquets out, some on her porch swing and others on the railings.  I had just finished and was walking to my car when Reverend Sullivan came up the street, talking with one of his neighbors.**

**"Landon," he said when he saw me.**

**"I'm not going anywhere.  Please tell Jamie that."**

_On my walk home I began talking with God.  Asking him to help me through this time of trouble.  To help ease these feelings of loneliness and betrayal deep within me.  'Please Lord show me how to free my heart from this pain and suffering.  Help me to find peace once again.  Show me Lord, please show me the way to…' I lifted my head at that very minute to see the front door of my house completely surrounded by flowers.  "Landon," I sighed._

_My father met me halfway down the walkway and said, "You had a visitor while you were gone."_

I could only shake my head in disbelief.

_"He wanted me to tell you that…he's not going anywhere."_

_I hung my head in shame.  I was so sure that he wouldn't want me anymore—why would he—I just assumed we were through.  I had spent the entire night worrying about Landon abandoning me that I didn't notice I was the one that abandoned him._

Coming Soon…

Chapter 10:  I'll Be There


	10. I'll Be There

The Lord's Plan By: kf6tac/Brian and Jamie Sommers 

Email: kf6tac@yahoo.com

            Jamiesommers23@hotmail.com

Rated: P/G 13

Synopsis:  Landon and Jamie have had their first date now they must face their friends, their family and their own fears.  Written from Landon's POV by Brian (**in bold print) and Jamie's POV by Jamie (_in italics_).**

  
Chapter 10:  I'll Be There

**I didn't hear from Jamie all of Saturday, and that made me nervous.  'Did her father give her my message?' I wondered.  I knew he didn't like me, but I figured he'd at least tell her.  'Maybe he told her, and…' I stopped right there.  The very thought was too much for me.  I didn't want to call her though, if there was something she was dealing with I didn't want to barge in.  When I had gotten home on Saturday, my mom told me that Sally called for some reason.**

**'Great, just what I needed,' I thought as I dialed the phone to call her back.**

**"Hello?"**

**"Hey Sally, it's Landon… you, uh, called?"**

**"Yeah I called Landon, but I guess you were out shopping!  You're so heartless."  *CLICK***

**'What was that all about?' I wondered.  'I didn't realize it was heartless to miss a phone call.'  Then I realized that Jamie had probably talked to her about Friday night before I got the flowers delivered.  For a minute I pondered picking up the phone and explaining to Sally, but I figured Jamie would do it once she decided what she wanted to do about, well, us.**

**The next morning my mom almost had to force me to go to church.  I was still afraid to talk to Jamie, mainly because I didn't want to hear her say something like "Landon, I just can't have a relationship right now."  But my mom wouldn't let me off the hook.**

**"Landon, she's probably just as scared as you are right now.  And you know she'll still be there.  If you really love her, you have to _show her you won't leave – not just tell her."  _**

**My mom always understood these things really well.  I couldn't argue with her, so I put on the best clothes I could find in my closet.**

**When we got to church, I had already decided that I was going to talk to Jamie as soon as I could.  We didn't arrive late, but everyone from the community was already starting to show up.  I looked around, frantically trying to find Jamie.  I finally saw her, standing up near the altar with her father.  She was wearing her choir robe and it looked like they were doing something with the choir.  I tried to make my way up front, but I kept running into community members trying to greet me.**

**"Hello Landon, beautiful day isn't it?"**

**"Yes Principal Kelly.  Ummm… could you excuse me a minute?"**

**"Oh hi Landon, good to see you."**

**"Hey Mrs. Johnson.  It's good to see you too."**

**"Landon, how are you?"**

**"I'm alright Mr. Fordman.  I'm kind of in a hurry though…"**

**"Good morning young man."**

**"Good morning ma'am, excuse me please…"**

**It went on and on.  'Come on people, I know it's considered a good thing to be polite… but can you cut a guy some slack??  I just want to get up front…"**

**By the time I got almost to the front, Jamie had sat down with the choir and it looked like Reverend Sullivan was going to start.  I moved as quickly as I could into the nearest pew, and when I looked up I was sitting right next to Belinda.**

**"Hey Belinda." I said quickly and somewhat curtly.**

**She looked at me really funny, and then said slowly "Hi, … Landon."**

**There was a brief moment of tension, but then my mom sat down next to me and everything kind of settled down.**

**"There you are Landon, I thought I had lost you in the crowd.  Oh good morning Belinda."**

**"Good morning Mrs. Carter."**

**It was then that Reverend Sullivan decided to start the service.  He stepped up to the podium, but he looked tired and beaten.**

**"Good morning everyone."**

**"Good morning," the crowd responded as usual.**

**"Before we start today's service, Jamie and I have… well, we have an… announcement to make."  He looked over at Jamie before continuing.  "Some of you have probably already heard it around town.  Some are probably wondering if it's true."**

**His eyes began to fill with tears, and he didn't need to say any more for me to know what was coming next.**

_My eyes kept scanning the crowd, looking for him, hoping that he would show up, knowing that he would.  I could feel his presence the minute he entered the building, but I couldn't get to him, it was too close to the start of the service for me to leave the choir area, so I just figured we'd talk to each other afterwards.  _

_Daddy and I decided it was time to tell the parishioners so he was going to be making an announcement today.  I decided to tell the other members of the choir this morning during our run through.  It wasn't easy, but…it had to be done._

_I began preparing for our morning worship when I saw him forcing his way through the crowd.  'He's coming to you Jamie,' or so I thought, but when he got to the front my worst fears came true.  He sat with Belinda.  'No,' I thought, 'this cannot be happening.  He doesn't want to be with her.  I know he doesn't.  He loves me.'  I began to think back on our relationship, looking for any signs that he might have been using me to make her jealous. 'Don't be ridiculous Jamie.  If that was want he wanted to do, he wouldn't have told you he loved you and he definitely wouldn't have punched Dean in the face.'  But there was only one way to find out for sure.  We needed to talk._

_It was then that I felt the hand of Mrs. Clemens on my leg.  I looked at her tear filled eyes, then listened as my father spoke._

_"It's hard for me to say this, but…we've had some bad news.  A few years ago Jamie was diagnosed with leukemia," you could hear the crowd's gasp.  I watched Landon's reaction, his mother was crying and he was just staring at me.  Just…staring.  I wanted to run into his arms at that very moment, 'just hold me Landon.  Please.  Just hold me,' but that wouldn't happen.  _

_By the clock, the service didn't last any longer than it did on any other Sunday, but it felt like it did.  Afterwards everyone seemed to be crowding around me, everyone but Landon. He just stood with his back against the wall, not moving, but still staring.  Eventually I saw his mom say something to him.  They looked at me as though I was the topic of their conversation, he nodded and then they left. _

**"It's hard for me to say this," the Reverend continued, "but we've had some bad news.  A few years ago Jamie was diagnosed with leukemia."**

**The entire congregation gasped out loud, and my mom just started crying.  I heard shuffling next to me, and when I looked up I saw Belinda nearly running toward the doors at the back of the church.  People all around us were murmuring in disbelief, some crying, others praying.  All I could do was stare at Jamie.  'Can she possibly know what I'm thinking right now?' I wondered to myself.  'I love you Jamie.  I love you with all my heart.  I'm here for you, and I'm not leaving.  I'm not leaving,' I started saying over and over again in my head, hoping that she would hear it somehow.**

**The rest of the service proceeded like it did any Sunday, but it just wasn't the same.  After the service was over everyone crowded around Jamie.  I couldn't get to her, so I stood there against the back wall waiting for the crowd to go away.  They didn't show any sign of letting up though.  Eventually my mom came over to me.**

**"Landon, are you alright?"**

**"Yeah mom, I'm just waiting to talk to Jamie."**

**She looked over at Jamie and then at the huge circle of people surrounding her.**

**"Landon, I don't think you're going to get to her for awhile… I understand that you want to talk to her, but why don't we leave and you can get in touch with her later today when things aren't as hectic?  Besides… she looks a little bit overwhelmed herself."**

**I looked back at Jamie, and as much as I didn't want to do it I realized that it would be better to leave.  People just kept crowding her, and she hadn't even gotten two steps from the front of the church.**

**"Yeah, I guess you're right mom."  I hated to leave things unspoken between Jamie and me, but I hoped I wouldn't have to go too much longer that way.**

About an hour after we got home, I picked up the phone and dialed Jamie's number.  I figured that an hour would have been long enough for all the churchgoers to head home.

**"Hello?"  Her father picked up on the other end.**

**"Hi Reverend, this is Landon.  I was wondering if Jamie was there."**

**"No Landon, she's not.  She said she was going out somewhere.  I… I'll let her know you called."**

**"Thanks Reverend."  My heart sank when he told me she wasn't home.  Would I ever get to tell her what I wanted to say?  Depressed, I grabbed a can of soda and went outside to work on my car.  I couldn't really think of anything else to do.**

_I changed my clothes and walked around my kitchen for a while opening and closing the refrigerator door absently looking for something to fill the emptiness I had in my stomach.  'You can't fill this void with food Jamie.  You know what you need to do.'  Once my decision had been made there was no stopping me. _

_"Daddy," I called out.  "I'm going out."  I grabbed my keys, threw on the sweater Landon gave me and headed for his house.  It was the first time in my life I ever speeded.  'You've had a lot of firsts since being with Landon,' I thought, 'and hopefully…I'll have a lot of lasts too.'_

_I parked away from his house expecting him to be inside with his mother, but he wasn't, he was standing at his car with the hood up.  I got out of my car and closed the door softly so as not to disturb him and watched him do his busy work.  I slowly made my way closer and closer to him until I was standing just a few feet away.  He couldn't see me until he closed the hood of his car._

_"I'm…" I began speaking before I could talk myself out of it. "I'm so sorry. I really should've told you sooner."   
  
"No. I made you do to many things… I kept you out too late…"_

_"No," I cut him off.  Not wanting him to feel guilty for my health I said, "No, no.  If anything you kept me healthy longer."  I knew it was true.  He was the reason I was still alive.  We were quiet for a little while.  _

_Landon looked like he was thinking really seriously about something.  "Are you scared?"  
  
I answered him in as easy going of a manner that I could, "To death..." He rolled his eyes to the side and shook his head a bit, 'Oh, Landon…' I thought, 'please don't do this to yourself.'  I made my way to him and said, "Lighten up," as though the thought of the person you love dying should be an easy thing to take._

_"It's not funny."  _

_At that moment I realized the depth of his love for me and I thought about his question.  Was I afraid of dying?  No.  No I wasn't, but I was petrified of something else.  "I'm scared of not being with you."  I could feel my tears start to fill my eyes and I so wanted to be strong here, but I couldn't.  _

_He put his hands on either side of my face and looked into my eyes saying, "Oh baby, that'll never happen. I'm here."  We held onto one another for a minute then he pulled back to look into my eyes again, but I couldn't face him.  I couldn't seem to raise my head.  "Jamie?"  I looked to the side, towards heaven, at his car…anywhere but his face.  "Baby?"  He pleaded with me to look at him and lifted my face to his, running his thumbs across my cheeks to wipe away my tears.  "I would never leave you.  EVER!"  His voice was so soft and sure.  "You're everything to me…everything.  I love you."  He leaned in and kissed me whispering against my lips over and over, "I love you.  I love you."    
  
_

_My hands lifted to his bent elbows as our opened mouths brushed--breathing each other in.  "I love you, Landon.  I love you."  Our kiss became frenzied.  Our tongues met each other's in apology and forgiveness.  All of our fears were washed away and as quickly as the kiss grew, it quieted down.  He began to kiss my tear-streaked cheeks--his hands never leaving my face--then he kissed my closed eyelids as I berated myself for thinking the worst of him, for thinking that he would've deserted me when I needed him most.  This man, this wonderful man loved me with every ounce of his soul.  I, Jamie Sullivan, at the age of 18 found what most people lived their whole lives without.  I found out the meaning of life: True love.  _

_Landon and I may not have as long of a time to spend together as most people do in this world, but I'd rather have one day with him, than an eternity without him. _

_"I love you, Landon."_

_Our foreheads were pressed up against each other's and we held hands.  "I love you too, Jamie." _

_It was the first time in days that I smiled and it felt so good._

**I shut the hood of my car and there she was.  I hadn't expected to see her, and I just blanked on what to tell her.  I also hadn't expected it to be so painful to see her, knowing that I probably wouldn't see her much longer.**

**"I'm… I'm so sorry," she began to say.  "I should've told you sooner."**

**"No, I made you do too many things… I kept you out too late…"**

**"No," she stopped me in mid-sentence.  "No, no.  If anything you've kept me healthy longer."  It was a painful reminder of how little time she really had.  It hurt me just to hear it.**

**I didn't know what to say for a while.  "Are you scared?" I finally asked her.  I was more afraid than I could ever recall being in my life.  But Jamie, she was always the strong one.  With all her faith and optimism… was she scared too?**

**"To death," she said.**

**'What am I going to do now?' I wondered.  The strongest, most steadfast person I had ever known in my life was as scared as I was.  I wasn't sure if I'd be able to make it without her strength.**

**"Lighten up," she said as she walked over to me.  Had she been trying to make a joke all along?  Any other time I would have laughed… but I couldn't.  Not at something like this.**

**"It's not funny," I said.  And it wasn't.  I was losing the woman I loved.**

**She looked at me for a few moments, and then she said, "I'm afraid of not being with you."**

**When I realized that was her biggest fear, I knew that she loved me as much as I loved her.  I also knew she needed to hear me say what I had been trying to say to her since Saturday.**

**"Oh baby, that'll never happen," I told her, pulling her close to me.  "I'm here."**

**We stood there in each other's arms for a while, and then I pulled back.  I hadn't told her everything I wanted to just yet.**

**"Jamie?"  I tried to look into her eyes, those beautiful eyes… but she wouldn't face me.  "Baby?"  I caressed her cheeks with my thumbs, pleading with her to hear me out.  "I would never leave you.  EVER.  You're everything to me… everything.  I love you."  I kissed her, and as our lips met I kept whispering to her, "I love you.  I love you."  I wanted to understand that as long as she was here on earth, she would never be alone.**

**Her mouth opened against mine and she replied "I love you too Landon.  I love you."  Our opened lips pressed against each other passionately, and for the first time in our relationship we let our kiss continue along its own course.  Our tongues met and mingled as we held on to each other, letting all the remaining apologies flow from one soul to another.  The kiss slowed down, and we stood with our foreheads pressed against each other.**

**"I love you, Landon."  The words brought joy into my heart; just like they had the first time she said them to me.**

**"I love you too, Jamie."**

In the midst of all the sadness and anger, I finally had hope again.  I had Jamie.

Coming Soon…

Chapter 11


	11. Would You Like To Dance?

Would You Like to Dance? 

By:  kf6tac (Brian) and Jamie Sommers

Email:  kf6tac@yahoo.com

             jamiesommers23@hotmail.com

Rated P/G 13

Synopsis:  Landon and Jamie have had their first date now they have to face their friends, their family and their own fears.  Written in both Landon's POV (in **bold** print by Brian/kf6tac) and Jamie's POV (in _italics_ by Jamie Sommers)

Chapter 11:  Would You Like To Dance?

**Spring break with Jamie passed by pretty quickly.  I took her out whenever she was feeling up to it, and we did things every other teenage couple would do: we went to the movies, we ate out together, and we ran our errands together.  It was kind of strange actually – everywhere we went we met people who were so full of sadness and despair for Jamie, but whenever we were walking around hand in hand or lying on the grass next to each other, we were happy.**

**Jamie had another doctor's appointment on Thursday afternoon, so I went into town by myself to pick up some groceries for my mom.  While I was in town, I noticed a lot of the guys from school going to or from their cars with garment bags.  Others were going into floral shops, and the girls all seemed busy at the make-up counters in all the stores I passed by.**

**'Prom…' I remembered.  Prom was going to be this Saturday night.  I had talked to Jamie about going earlier in the week, but she decided it couldn't possibly be good for her to have an entire night out like that.  We were both sad that we would be missing our Senior Prom, but I didn't want her to get worse all of a sudden because of it.  I just got the stuff for my mom and went straight home on Thursday.  Seeing all the other people getting ready for Prom just made me sad, thinking of what Jamie was going to miss.  I had gone to the Junior Prom with Belinda the year before and I figured it wouldn't be all too different… but still it was fun, and I felt bad that Jamie would miss out.**

_"Hello?"  I woke up to the sound of the phone ringing and immediately thought, 'who would be calling so early on a Monday morning?'_

_"Hey baby."_

_"Landon?"_

_"Is there someone else that calls you baby that I should know about?" he kind of chuckled._

_"Why are you calling me so early?  You do realize there's no school today right?"_

_"Jamie," he sounded a little confused.  "It's almost 11:30 in the morning."_

_"What???"  I sat straight up and looked at my clock in disbelief.  I had gone to bed exhausted before 9pm the night before and I had slept until mid morning.  These past few days had obviously been getting to me.  I had hardly had more than 8 hours of sleep combined since Friday night, so I suppose last night's 14hours were well deserved.  _

_I could hear Landon chuckling over the phone, making a joke out of it.  "Well…I WAS going to invite you out for lunch, but if you're not up to it…"_

_"No," I said quickly.  "I'm up to it."  Pass up a chance to see Landon?  Never!  "Just give me thirty minutes to get cleaned up."  _

He picked me up shortly after noon and we headed downtown to my favorite Chinese restaurant.  We talked for a while about school—he had gotten his acceptance letter to UNC—laughed over our egg rolls and he asked me to go to the prom with him while we finished our sweet and sour pork.

_"I'm not sure I'm up to it."_

_"Well if you don't think you can, that's fine.  We don't have to go.  I just thought it would be nice seeing as it's our senior prom and all."_

_"Why don't you let me think about it?  If I'm not so tired then maybe…" I cracked open my fortune cookie asking myself if I should take the chance and go with him to the prom.  'Jamie that's a really big event and are you sure you'd be able to sit through the whole thing?  You wouldn't be able to dance as much as you'd like and you'd probably get tired within the first few minutes.'  I looked down at the little piece of paper that came from within my cookie and smiled thinking; 'It's funny how God gets his messages across sometimes.'_

_"What're you smiling at?"_

_"My fortune."_

_"What's it say?"_

_"Here," I handed it to him.  "Read it."_

_"Rest has a peaceful effect on your physical and emotional health," after a moment of consideration he said, "I guess this means we're not going to the prom after all."_

_We kind of laughed it off, but deep down inside we were both a little sorry that we had to miss out on it.  _

**I was at home in my room on Friday afternoon when Eric called.**

**"Hey dog, what's up?"**

**"Hey Eric, how's it going?"**

**"Craaaaazy my man, you know that report we had to do for Mr. Gilbert's class over break?"  
  
**

**"Yeah, the one about a species of your choice?"**

**"Yeah, that one man.  I totally haven't touched it!"  I couldn't help but laugh.  Here it was, Friday, and Eric hadn't done his report.**

**"Man, I can't believe you haven't started the thing at all!  It's gotta be six to eight pages!  Mine is at least done except my conclusion."**

**"Well you know me, bro.  I've been all caught up getting ready for Prom and… oh.  Sorry dude.  I kinda forgot."  Apparently he caught my disappointed sigh when he mentioned Prom.**

**"It's alright, Eric.  Just make sure you get out there and bust a move for the both of us, alright?"**

**"Heeeeeey man, you _know_ I can do that!"**

**"Sounds good.  But you really should get rollin' on that report.  Time's tickin' away!"**

**"Yeah, yeah.  I'll talk to ya later Landon."**

**After I hung up the phone, I started thinking about Prom again.  There just had to be something I could do… but what?  It's not like I could dance.  Jamie probably wouldn't have appreciated me trampling her feet again like I had the last time we tried to dance.**

**"Mom?"**

**My mom was reading something in the living room downstairs.**

**"Can you do me a favor?"  After another hour of thinking I finally had come up with an idea.**

**"Sure Landon, what do you need?"**

**"Well… I was hoping you could teach me how to dance."  My mom was a really good dancer; at least that's what a lot of her friends had told me.**

**"What kind of dancing are you thinking about?"**

**"Just something that I could maybe do with Jamie.  Nothing too fancy."**

**"Okay Landon," she said.  "I think I have just the thing for you."**

**We spent the next hour or two in the living room.  First my mom showed me the steps.  I had to watch her repeat them so many times just to start getting some sort of idea.  At one point I was afraid I'd never learn the steps right, but my mom wasn't about to let me quit.**

**"Come on Landon, the steps aren't that tough.  And besides, isn't Jamie worth it?"**

**Once again, I couldn't argue with her.  After I had watched her go through the motions enough times, my mom had me follow along beside her.  It probably was a sight to see.  I stumbled so many times over just my own feet, not to mention stubbing my toes here and there on the furniture.  I eventually got them down though, and then came the final phase: I had to dance with my mom.  I felt so bad for her.  Even though I could go through the motions by myself, it didn't stop me from stepping on her feet.  She was a good sport about it though, and she kept going until eventually I stopped stepping on her and we were just dancing.**

**That whole thing took about two hours, so I ran upstairs and sat down on my bed with the phone.  I dialed Jamie's number, and after two rings she picked up.**

**"Hey Jamie, it's me."**

**"Hi Landon, how are you?"**

**"I'm doing alright… how're you feeling?"  I figured I didn't want to trouble her with my plan if she wasn't feeling too great.**

**"I'm feeling fine, I've been doing okay lately."**

**"Hey, that's great!  Listen, I was wondering if your dad would be okay with me spending some time at your place tomorrow evening.  Nothing huge, I just wanted to come over and be with you."**

**"Ummm… give me just one second and I'll ask him."  I heard some muffled voices, and I figured she probably had her hand over the phone while talking to her father.  They went on for a while, and I briefly thought that maybe he was going to say 'no,' then Jamie came back on the line.  "Landon?  Sorry that took awhile.  My father says it's okay as long as he's home."**

**"So what time is alright with him?"**

**"He's going to be out most of the day tomorrow, but he says he should be home after 8:30."**

**"Sounds great Jamie, I'll see you then.  And tell your dad 'thanks' if you get a chance.  I love you."**

**"I love you too, Landon."**

**"Hey, ya know what?" I added on really quickly.**

**"What?"**

**"It always makes me smile when I hear you say that."  I was beaming at the moment actually.**

**"It makes me smile too.  I am so lucky to have you with me."**

**"I am too Jamie, I am too."**

**We ended up talking awhile longer on the phone until Jamie got tired.  We wished each other good night, and we both went on our own ways to get ready for bed.  As I brushed my teeth, the thought hit me that Jamie and I were, in a way, getting ready for bed "together".  It made me think, 'Perhaps one day we'll be getting ready for bed in the same home too.'**

_For the time being, Landon and I seemed to put our troubles and fears behind us.  We just enjoyed our time together.  He kept me busy during that week, taking me out to the movies, for walks, dinner and one day he actually helped me take care of some church business but my favorite time was when we did nothing at all.  We would just lie in the grass next to his house looking out over the water and holding hands.   He'd sit with me on my porch swing and read to me from Mr. Rothman's list—The Catcher In The Rye—until I would fall asleep against his shoulder.  By the end of the week I didn't even have the energy to sit on the porch swing with him, I was so tired, but we did talk and we made plans over the phone for the following night._

_"Hey Jamie, it's me."_

_"Hi Landon, how are you?"  I always got this incredible feeling when he called me.  Like I was on his mind and he just had to pick up the phone._

_"I'm doing alright… how're you feeling?"  _

_I didn't want him to worry about me so I answered, "I'm feeling fine, I've been doing okay lately."_

_"Hey, that's great!  Listen, I was wondering if your dad would be okay with me spending some time at your place tomorrow evening.  Nothing huge, I just wanted to come over and be with you."_

_"Ummm… give me just one second and I'll ask him."   I put my hand over the receiver as I spoke to my father._

_"Daddy?"_

_"Hmmm."  He was reading the paper and barely looked up at me.  _

_"Would it be all right if Landon came over tomorrow night?  He'd like to spend some time with me," I held my breath in anticipation.  Regardless of Landon's display of affections, my father still didn't trust him._

_He looked up from his paper and said, "Jamie, you've been spending an awful lot of time with him lately."_

_"Not that much time daddy."_

_"Did you see him yesterday?"_

_"Yes."_

_"And what about the day before?"_

_I understood my father's point, but we had discussed this over and over again.  "Daddy, what's so wrong with Landon and I wanting to be together?  We love each other."_

_"You're awfully young to be saying you're in love."_

_"You and mommy weren't much older than us.  You told me she was only 19 when you met her."_

_I shouldn't have done that—brought up my mother.  His face grew sullen and his expression changed drastically from one of concern to one of loneliness.  I wondered for a brief moment if this is what Landon would look like whenever someone mentioned my name after I had gone._

_"I'm sorry daddy.  I shouldn't have…"_

_"No.  Don't be sorry.  You did nothing wrong," he was quiet for a few seconds then said, "I suppose it's your decision whether or not to spend time with that boy, but I do not want him here at night unless I'm here.  Is that to be understood?"_

_"Yes daddy."_

_"I'll be out doing some last minute details on the church's clothing drive so I should be back by about 8:30pm."_

_"Okay.  Thank you."  I bent over his chair and placed a little kiss against his forehead before heading into the living room to finish my conversation.  "Landon?  Sorry that took awhile.  My father says it's okay as long as he's home."_

_"So what time is alright with him?"_

_"He's going to be out most of the day tomorrow, but he says he should be home after 8:30."_

_"Sounds great Jamie, I'll see you then.  And tell your dad 'thanks' if you get a chance.  I love you."_

_"I love you too, Landon."_

_"Hey, ya know what?" _

_"What?" _

_"It always makes me smile when I hear you say that."  I couldn't see it, but I could hear it._

_"It makes me smile too.  I am so lucky to have you with me."_

_"I am too Jamie, I am too."_

_I began feeling better as our conversation progressed.  It was as though he had some form of healing power over me.  Whether it was subconscious or not, all I knew was that whenever he was with me, or talked to me I felt alive._

_"So what'd you have planned for tomorrow night?"_

_"Nuh uh.  It's a surprise."_

_"A surprise, huh?  Well it just so happens I love surprises…."_

**The next morning I was up a bit earlier than my usual Saturday wake-up time.  Well – given that my usual time to get up on Saturdays is 1PM, I was up quite a bit earlier.  It was only ten when I started going through the fridge, looking for something to eat.  My mom walked in from the garden and was surprised to find me there.**

**"Landon, you're up early!"**

**"Yeah, I've got some things to take care of before this evening.  But right now I'm just starved!  You wouldn't happen to know of anything I could make and eat really quick, would you?"**

**"Actually no, I don't think we have any microwave food lying around.  But here, why don't you sit down and I'll make you some toast really quick."**

**"Mom, you don't have to do that.  I can make toast for myself."  At eighteen years old I'd hoped I could operate a toaster.**

**"Well, I don't get to cook breakfast all that often for my son, so I should at least make him his toast," she replied.  "Just sit down and try not to fall asleep again."**

**I sat down at the table, and while I was waiting I asked her, "Mom, do we have any sparkling cider around?"**

**"Sparkling cider for breakfast Landon?  That's kind of unusual."**

**"Oh not for me right now, it's for Jamie later tonight.  I have something planned."**

**"We might have some, why don't you go check – it'll probably be over where we used to keep all the wines."**

**We had a pretty big collection of wine at one point, although I think we eventually gave most of them away to friends as presents or brought them along to parties.  We didn't exactly have a wine cellar, although we had a few racks along the walls of this empty room in the house.  I looked around, saw a few leftover wine bottles, and then I found a few bottles of sparkling cider.  I dusted them off and looked at the date on the labels.  They weren't old at all, so I figured they'd be okay.  I took one bottle back into the house.**

**"Did you find them?" my mom asked as she was setting out my toast and some jam.**

**"Yeah, I got 'em.  Thanks mom."**

_I could hear my father's voice echoing up the stairs and Landon's following in reply.  The minute I heard the footfalls on the floor in front of my room, my heart began to race with anticipation of seeing Landon.  I had expected my father's knock any second, I could hear the footsteps walking back and forth in the hallway and wondered, what was going on.  Racing into my closet I grabbed the dress I had out for the night and pulled my hair back into a ponytail.  I was going to leave it down—Landon loves it when it's down—but I just wanted to hurry up and see him.  After looking in the mirror and being satisfied with what I saw, I headed downstairs to greet him._

_"Daddy?"  He was sitting in his office putting the finishing touches on his Sunday sermon.    
  
_

_"Yes," he looked at me._

_"Didn't I hear Landon come in?"_

_"Yes," he went back to making his notations._

_"Well…umm…where is he?"  I had immediately gone into the living room when I first got downstairs, but he wasn't there.  I checked the porch, the kitchen…every room, but still no Landon._

_"He's upstairs on the balcony."_

_"Oh,"  'now why would he be up there,' I thought.  I found out the moment I stepped out onto the balcony._

****

**Jamie's dad was actually a really good sport about letting me carry out my little surprise for the evening.  Of course I got the usual warnings from him.**

**"Now Landon, I'm just going to be downstairs in my office.  I don't want any trouble, alright?"**

**"No troubles tonight sir, I promise."**

**"Good.  Now … what exactly was it you wanted to do?"**

**I explained my plan to him.  "Since Jamie and I couldn't go to the Senior Prom this year, I thought I'd surprise her by learning how to dance and paying her a visit tonight.  I was hoping maybe you'd have some music she likes that I could use.  Oh, and I, uh, brought some sparkling cider along.  I was kinda hoping to dance with her on the upstairs balcony." **

**"Well…" he pondered my proposal for awhile, and I wasn't sure if he was thinking about music or throwing me out.  "I'm pretty sure Jamie has some favorite CDs over here in our collection, and I've got a small stereo you can use.  Where were you planning on keeping the sparkling cider?"**

**"I figured I'd just pour us two glasses and keep the rest of the bottle here in the house."**

**"Well why don't you help me move the table over on the porch up to the balcony.  We can put everything on that, and you could keep the bottle with you too."**

**"That would be great, thanks Reverend."**

I walked out onto the balcony and saw him standing off to the far corner. Next to him was the tiny table that normally resided on our downstairs porch. On it was a bottle of sparkling cider, two glasses and a radio.

_He lifted the corners of his mouth in a loving smile and offered me the rose he held between his fingers, "I figured...if I can't bring you to the prom then I'd bring the prom to you."_

_"Landon..." I walked towards him and hugged him, whispering in his ear, "I love you."_

_He laid the flower down on the table and turned on a CD, "Would you like to dance?" _

_We had danced a few times in the past and I knew that it wasn't his favorite thing to do, and my feet would definitely suffer for it, but I said, "I'd love to."_

_He led me to the middle of the balcony and began to dance with me. Not just the scuff and shuffle that we normally did, but actually dancing with me. Moving me around in perfect rhythm with the music, turning me under his arm, spinning me out, turning me back into his chest. 'Landon Carter learned how to dance for me. Guess I finally got that miracle,' I thought. _

_The song changed and another, slower one began. He pulled me into his arms and held me close as we swayed back and forth. Placing a soft kiss against the curve of my neck he buried his face in my hair and inhaled deeply, almost like he was breathing me in. "I love you Jamie."_

_Pulling back to look into his eyes I said, "I love you." _

_I tilted my head and kissed him softly against the lips, but he pulled away after the first few seconds and said, "I promised your father I would be a gentleman."_

_"You are a gentleman."_

_"If you keep kissing me I won't be."_

_I smiled and laid my head against his shoulder all the while thanking God for my miracle...Landon._

**As Jamie walked onto the balcony, I held my breath and hoped that my surprise would please her.  When she looked over at the table with a curious look, I offered her a rose I had chosen out of my mom's garden.**

**"I figured… if I can't bring you to Prom then I'd bring the Prom to you."**

**We danced the night away up there on her balcony, and it was great.  At first I was worried that I might forget what my mom had showed me… but everything turned out fine.  It felt so wonderful to be really dancing with Jamie, not just shuffling around and stepping on her feet.  **

**Once or twice in the evening I saw Reverend Sullivan out in the yard, looking up at us.  Not long, just a brief glance to make sure everything was all right.  I don't think Jamie saw him, but I looked back at him in an attempt to reassure him that nothing was wrong.  He was hesitant for a while, but then he smiled weakly up at us.  And I smiled back.  I didn't know if he still disliked me, but at least he wasn't angry at me for being with Jamie.**

**We were dancing until about 11PM, and by that time we had just about emptied the bottle of sparkling cider and gone through all of the CDs.  We turned off the stereo and went inside to sit down.  We sat and talked for about five minutes, and then Reverend Sullivan poked his head in the door.**

**"You two should probably be getting some rest.  I'll be turning in for the night in another few minutes, so Landon you'll have to get going."  He didn't say it angrily or in a way that sounded like he was trying to get rid of me, which was a relief.**

**I stood up and Jamie came over to give me a hug.  "You don't have to see me out, Jamie.  Why don't you just hang out here and get ready for bed."**

**"Are you sure, Landon?"**

**"Yeah, I'll be okay.  Thanks for the great night."**

**"Thank you, Landon, for a wonderful Senior Prom."**

**As I walked out of the room, Reverend Sullivan shut the door and followed me down the stairs.  When I got to the front door, I turned around while grabbing my coat.**

**"Thank you Reverend, for letting me do this.  I really appreciate it."**

**"You're welcome, Landon.  Have a good night."**

**"You too, Reverend."**

Coming Soon…

Chapter 12


	12. Bridging The Gap

The Lord's Plan 

By:  kf6tac (Brian) and Jamie Sommers

Email: kf6tac@yahoo.com

          Jamiesommers23@hotmail.com

Rated: PG-13

Synopsis:  This story is about Landon and Jamie's budding relationship.  They've had their first date; Landon has told her he loves her, now they have to face their friends, their family and their own fears.  Written from both Landon (**written in bold print by kf6tac/Brian**) and Jamie's (_written in italic print by Jamie Sommers_) POV.

Chapter 12:  Bridging the Gap 

**When I got home from Jamie's house on Saturday evening, I almost ran into my mom as I headed up the stairs.  She was on her way down with a basket full of laundry.**

**"Oh Landon, how did everything go with Jamie?" she asked excitedly.  I guess she really picked up on how special Jamie was to me.  Things weren't like this with the girlfriends I had before.**

**"Everything was great, thanks again for the sparkling cider!  It really helped."**

**"How did Reverend Sullivan take this all?"**

**"Well… I guess he was pretty cool with it.  He helped me set everything up on the balcony.  Although I still get the feeling he doesn't quite trust me.  Can't blame the guy though."**

**"Just give him some time Landon," she said.  She immediately got that "I'm feeling guilty" look though, and I could tell we were both thinking the same thing: 'How much time can I really give?'**

**"Why don't we invite him and Jamie over sometime?" she offered after a few seconds of silence.  "It can be a family meet family thing.  I know we've been going to his church for years, but we've never actually sat down and had dinner with him or anything like that."**

**"Do you think he'd go for it, mom?"**

**"He's a nice man, Landon.  I think he'll agree to it."**

**I considered calling right then to ask, but my mom brought me back to reality and pointed out that it was almost 11PM.  And besides, he had said he was getting ready to turn in before I left.  We agreed that we could meet up with him after church.**

**Things were bustling at church the next morning.  It was like everyone in town who ever went to the church, even just once, had showed up.  Of course Jamie was still quite the focus of attention, and everyone who hadn't been in church for the announcement last week gathered around her before the service to talk to her.  I saw Belinda's parents there, but I noticed that Belinda herself hadn't showed up.  As a matter of fact, I hadn't heard or seen much of her since last Sunday.  I was thinking about that when Eric came up and clapped me on the shoulder.**

**"Hey Landon, how you doin' bro?"**

**"I'm great man, how about you?  And hey, how was Prom and that 'hot date' of yours?"**

**"It was great, I'll have to tell you all about it.  Did you and Jamie do anything?"**

**"Yeah, I uh… I sorta brought the prom to her."**

**"Man, I always knew you were the ladies' man Landon."  I chuckled at that one.  Eric was always a funny guy.**

**"Thanks.  So what brings you here to church?  You never struck me as the serious church-going type."**

**"It's this whole thing with Jamie, ya know?  It got me thinkin'… maybe I should start getting a little friendlier with 'the big guy'."  He shifted his gaze upward, and I knew what he was talking about.**

**"Yeah, I know what you mean.  Hey, I'll have to catch you later – looks like the service is about to start."**

**"Alright Landon, call me sometime dude!"**

**After the service, my mom and I hung back until the crowd had left and we could talk to Jamie and her dad.  I offered the invitation to them to come over for dinner sometime during the week; Reverend Sullivan initially tried to turn it down.**

**"Landon, we really wouldn't want to trouble your mother."**

**I glanced over at Jamie, and she replied in kind, "We don't want to put any extra burdens on her, Landon."  I knew Jamie was being honest about that, and it seemed like her father was too.  He honestly didn't seem to dislike me as much as before.**

**"Oh it'll be no problem at all," my mom chimed in.  "I love cooking for guests.  And besides, Landon can give me a hand.  I've trained him well."  She said that last part with a grin.**

**Reverend Sullivan pondered it for a while, and then he agreed.  "As long as it's no trouble to you, we'd love to come."**

**"That's great!" my mom exclaimed, and I could tell she was genuinely excited about having guests over.  It had been awhile since we had anyone over for dinner.  "How does Friday evening sound?  It'll be at the end of the school week, so no one will have to hurry through dinner to do homework."**

**And so the planners were marked, times were set aside, and everything was good to go.  My mom and her ideas… she's a genius, I tell you.**

**"Do you need us to bring anything, Mrs. Carter?" Jamie asked politely.**

**"Just yourselves, Jamie.  We'll take care of everything.  Oh and don't worry about dressing up, we're pretty casual about our dinners."**

**"We'd better get going, Jamie," Reverend Sullivan said after looking at his watch.  "It's getting pretty far into the day.  Thanks again for the invitation, Mrs. Carter."**

**"You're always welcome at our place, Reverend.  Come along, Landon.  We've got a dinner to plan."**

_"Sure mom just give me a minute," he turned towards my father and said, "Would you mind if I had a moment with Jamie sir?"_

_"Well…uh…of course.  I'll meet you at the car Jamie."  _

_"I guess I'll meet you at the car too Landon."_

_" 'kay mom."_

_We just stood there holding hands and looking at one another until our parents were out of sight, then we stepped into each other's embrace. He looked over in the direction that they had walked and kissed me when he saw that that no one was watching.  _

_He buried his face in my hair and said, "I missed you."_

_"I missed you too."  _

_"Are you doing anything special today?"_

_"No.  Not really."_

_"Would you like to?  Maybe we could go see a matinee or something?"_

_"Landon…I'm kind of tired…" I felt bad having to turn him down, but I was really feeling the effects of last night's "prom" and this morning's church service._

_"That's okay…we don't have to do anything at all.  We could just sit on your porch for a while or…I just wanna spend some time with you."  He tucked his head down enabling him to be eye level with me and asked, "Do you think your dad would be cool with me stopping by later?"_

_"I don't know about my dad, but I know I would really like it."  _

_He walked me to my car where my father was waiting and kissed my cheek.  "See you later."_

_We spent the afternoon together sitting on the porch swing.  My father conveniently had some things to take care of in the yard, but we didn't mind.  We could just be together and not do anything at all and that would be enough for us.  _

_Going back to school the next day was a little hard—I just wasn't feeling…right.  Tuesday I went back to the doctor and wound up getting my medications increased.  They made me tired and a bit lethargic so I was pretty grateful Landon had four of my classes with me.  At lunch we would sit outside under a tree and I would usually fall asleep while Landon would hold me.  He was the best pillow a girl could ask for.  _

_On Friday I woke up with a slight fever but I didn't stay home from school.  If I had then we wouldn't be able to go to Landon's for dinner and I really wanted to go.  _

_"Hey?  Are you okay?"  Landon could tell something was wrong the minute he saw me that morning.  "You look like you don't feel well."_

_"No.  I'm fine.  I just have a little temperature.  It'll go away."_

_He gave me the same look that my father had mastered over the past two years.  The one that says, 'Jamie…don't push yourself.'_

_"Seriously Landon.  I'm fine."_

**Monday at school was typical.  Well… almost typical.  I felt terrible because people kept looking at Jamie.  Everywhere we went, people stared.  And it wasn't the same surprised look we got when we first walked on to campus holding hands.  They all looked at her like she was some new student, someone they had never seen before.**

**'Can't you leave her alone?' I wanted to scream.  'Can't you see that she's the same person?  It's still Jamie Sullivan!'**

**I felt bad because I knew all Jamie had wanted was to live a normal life.  I wondered to myself that if I had gone after her that Friday night, maybe she wouldn't have had to tell everyone else.  Now it just seemed like everywhere we went, people backed off as if they would break her if they stood too close.  Whenever we went into a room, people stopped talking about their lives and quieted down, as if they didn't want to hurt Jamie's feelings by letting her hear about their "normal" lives.**

**Jamie tried to be strong, and she didn't complain about anything.  I knew it hurt her though.  I could see it in her eyes and hear it in her voice.  I could tell from they way she held my hand a little bit tighter, stayed just a little bit closer to me whenever we walked through the halls.  We both did the best we could to deal with it.  We went through our daily routines like nothing was new.  We still met each other between classes, went to our shared locker together, and ate lunch outside beneath the trees.  A few times Jamie would fall asleep there while we waited for class to start again, but I didn't mind.  I just kept her close to me.**

**After a long week of school, Friday night finally came.  My mom made a pretty big meal, and while I was helping her out in the kitchen I wondered what we would do with all the leftovers.  It was clearly too much for four people to handle.**

**'I guess I know what I'll be eating for dinner the next couple of days,' I thought to myself as I prepared the salad.**

**As my mom was setting everything out on the dinner table, I heard a car door close.  I looked out the front window and I saw Jamie and her father coming up toward the door.  She was wearing the pink sweater I gave her.  I knew she had woken up in the morning with a slight fever, so I hoped it was keeping her warm enough.**

**"Mom, they're here!" I called as I walked over to the front door.  I opened it as they got to the top of the steps, and I welcomed them both in.**

**"Come on in, dinner is just about ready.  My mom is just finishing things up in the kitchen and then she'll be right out.  Here, let me get your coat Reverend."**

**"Thank you, Landon," he said as he handed me his jacket.  I hung it up on our coat rack, and when I turned around my mom was already in the room greeting the two of them.**

**After a few minutes of conversation, we all sat down at the table.  My mom had really gone all out for this dinner, and we even had a few appetizers before the main course.  By the time we were done eating almost two hours had passed, and looking around the table I could tell everyone was quite full.  There were plenty of leftovers, and I figured I was right about my dinners for the next few days.  After dinner, my mom suggested that Jamie and I have a walk outside and watch the sunset.  Her father gave me quick glance.**

**"Sure, we'll be right outside if you guys need anything."  I said it partially to reassure Reverend Sullivan, partially to deliver the 'face-value' of the words.**

_Dinner that night was wonderful.  Landon's mom had made quite a spread and afterwards she suggested that Landon and I go outside and enjoy the sunset while she and my father had their coffee.  Have I mentioned how much I love this woman?  She was more than incredible...she was…amazing._

_"It's a little chilly out here.  You wanna wear my jacket?"_

_"No.  I'll be fine."_

_He led me to the bench that was attached to their side porch and we sat down in our customary position—with me in the crook of his arm._

_"Thank you for inviting us over for dinner tonight.  I think my father is actually enjoying himself."_

_"Your welcome.  What about you?  Are you enjoying yourself?"_

_"Mmmmm.  Always…whenever I'm with you I enjoy myself.  It's funny," I turned to look at him.  "We don't even have to do anything…we can just sit here and not say anything and that's enough."_

_He kissed my forehead and said, "Just being with you is enough for me."  After a beat he said, "That Friday and Saturday were the worse days of my life."_

_He didn't have to tell me which ones he was speaking of—I knew.  "Mine too.  I hated having to tell you the truth," I paused, "but more than that…I hated you not knowing the truth."_

_"I hated not seeing you…not being able to talk to you…  I never wanna go through anything like that again."  He kissed my head again and whispered against my skin, "I'm so sorry for how I handled that.  I should've come after you.  I just didn't know what to do."_

_"Don't be sorry Landon," I turned to look at him.  "You handled it just fine.  I was the one that handled it poorly.  I should've trusted you.  I should've told you sooner."  I began shaking my head back and forth trying to erase the uneasy feelings that those memories brought to mind._

_"Hey," he placed his hands on my face and held his forehead against mine.  "We both made mistakes, I guess we'll just have to learn from them."  _

_"I love you," I leaned in and placed a soft kiss on his lips._

_"I love you too."  _

_Settling back into the crook of his arm I said, "You know with everything that happened…I'm not sorry." I knew I wasn't explaining myself very well, but I tried, "What I mean is…I don't regret what happened.  If anything, it brought us closer."_

_I could feel him smiling against my forehead.  "Yeah…I guess it did."  After a minute he asked me, "So…do you have any regrets?"_

_"You mean about us?"_

_"About us…life…whatever."_

_"Just one.  It's stupid, but…"_

_"What?"_

_"I regret not taking the time to build my telescope."_

_"Can't you do it now?  How much time do you have before the comet comes?"_

_"A few weeks…almost a month."_

_"Well, that's enough time, isn't it?"_

_"Yes…I suppose, but…" I didn't have to say it--he would understand.  I'm just not capable of that anymore.  I was getting too weak.  "Do you have any regrets?" I asked him._

_"Just one."_

_"Hmmm?"_

_"Not getting to know you sooner."  _

_I lifted my lips up to meet his waiting ones, "I guess I was wrong.  I have two regrets."  I smiled and laid my head against his shoulder.  My fever was coming back…I could feel it.  I closed my eyes and listened to the water lap behind us once again falling asleep to the steady beat of his heart._

##

**Jamie and I watched the sunset over the water, and then we talked for a while.  We talked about everything that had happened two weeks ago, and I realized that we both were scared to death that Friday and Saturday.  It was good to know that even when we had problems like that, Jamie and I shared the same emotions.  We talked about regrets, about how I wished I had gotten to know her sooner.  She brought up her telescope that she had wanted to build, and I realized that even though there was a month or so left before the comet got here she probably wouldn't be able to finish her telescope.  I felt bad about that, she had seemed so excited about seeing the comet when I first ran into her in the cemetery that night… it seemed so long ago, but it was probably only a month or two.**

**Jamie fell asleep on my shoulder sitting there in front of the water.  I pulled her sweater up over her right shoulder, to make sure she wouldn't get a chill sitting out there.  I looked up at the sky, and watched as the stars slowly came out.  I heard her breathing softly as she slept, and I decided that she was going to see that comet when it came around.  I had never built a telescope before, but I already had Jamie's first telescope to use as a model.  I wasn't a math whiz or anything, but I did know a thing or two about proportions and how to expand the scale of something.  I figured I could find out how big of a mirror this new telescope would need and then just change the size of the rest of the parts.  I would have to get her telescope though… **

**"Landon!"  It was my mom.  "Reverend Sullivan has to get going soon."**

**"We'll be right there, mom!"**

**I didn't want to wake Jamie, so I cradled her in my arms and lifted her up.  She mumbled something of an objection, so I just said to her, "It's alright, Jamie.  I didn't want you to wake up."  She smiled at me, and before closing her eyes again she wrapped one arm around my neck.**

**"Don't worry, nothing's wrong.  She just fell asleep, that's all," I said as I approached the house.  Reverend Sullivan was standing at the door and I didn't want him to worry.  I carried Jamie out to her father's car, and I set her down in the passenger side.**

**"I'll talk to you later, alright love?" I whispered to her.**

**"Mmmmm hmmmm.  Good night Landon.  I love you."**

**"I love you too, Jamie."**

**I shook her father's hand, and before he left I asked him, "Reverend, is Jamie's telescope at your place?"**

**"No," he said after thinking for a while.  "I believe she left it at the cemetery."**

**"Alright.  Thanks."**

**I watched as they drove off, and then I went back into the house.  I was pretty wiped out, but instead of going right to bed I sat down and started to do some calculations for Jamie's new telescope.**

_My father helped me get ready for bed and tucked me in making me feel like a little girl again.  "Daddy?" I asked as he pulled the comforter up to my chin._

_"Yes."_

_"It was nice tonight, wasn't it?"_

_"Yes, it was.  Very nice."_

_"Yeah," I rolled over and touched my little stuffed bear that Landon had won for me a few weeks ago.  "I'm glad you're getting to know him.  He's really not as bad as you thought.  He's such a good person daddy and his mother…"_

_"She's a good woman."_

_"Mmmmm, yes she is," I thought about the afternoon she had set up mine and Landon's lunch then laid a blanket out by the tree for us.  "She' very supportive of Landon and me.  I think she can see how much he loves me."  I was falling in and out of sleep and I wasn't sure if I heard him right or if it was just my imagination._

_"Yes…we all can.  I'll try Jamie.  I can't promise anything, but I'll try."_

Coming Soon…

Chapter 13


	13. The Moment I Saw You Cry

The Lord's Plan 

By:  kf6tac (Brian) and Jamie Sommers

Email:  kf6tac@yahoo.com

           jamiesommers23@hotmail.com

Rated P/G 13

Synopsis:  Landon and Jamie have had their first date now they have to face their friends, their family and their own fears.  Written in both Landon's POV (in **bold** print by Brian/kf6tac) and Jamie's POV (in _italics_ by Jamie Sommers)

Chapter 13:  The Moment I Saw You Cry 

**Saturday morning, I went over to the cemetery to look for Jamie's telescope.  I pulled my car up to where we had spent the night during our date, and it was right there where we left it.  It was good to know that people didn't come by and damage it while it was sitting there.  I had just started to take it apart and load it into my car when I heard the rumbling of a loud engine.  I looked up, and Dean had pulled his truck right up to my car.**

**'Now what could he possibly be doing here?' I thought to myself as Dean got out of the truck.  He didn't have any family buried at the cemetery… so I concluded that the only reason he could be there was that he was looking for me.  We just kind of looked at each other for a while, neither person sure what exactly to say or do.  Dean was the first to actually say something.**

**"So uh… I talked to Eric."  About me and Jamie, no doubt.  I wondered what was coming next.  He stood there again, trying to figure out what to say.  Finally he managed, "Do you need some help with this stuff?"  He gestured toward the disassembled telescope at my feet.**

**He hadn't exactly apologized, but I knew what it was like to be a 'macho' guy.  It was the same reason I somehow couldn't bring myself to apologize to Jamie about the incident by the lockers… not until I fell in love with her at least.  Dean wasn't being funny or stupid here--he was actually trying.  I decided to cut him some slack.**

**"Sure."  I handed him the base of the telescope and we started loading things up.**

**My first stop after the cemetery was Jamie's house.  It didn't seem like anyone was up, so I just sat there in the yard measuring her existing telescope.  I did all the math in a little notebook, and then I was off to the hardware store.  I needed to get a lot of things… screws, nuts, bolts, just about everything you could think of to build a telescope.  I stopped at my house after that to get some tools and a little worktable, and then I headed back to Jamie's house.  I figured that since this telescope would be larger, I probably wouldn't be able to fit it into the back of my car.  That meant I had to do all the work in Jamie's yard.  I hoped her dad wouldn't mind.**

**It took me a little while to get everything unloaded.  I had to set up the worktable, and then I had this big cylinder of craft board that I was going to be using as the main body of the telescope.  I decided to start from the bottom up, building a base first so I'd have a place for the scope when I finished it.  I pulled out a couple sheets of plywood that I would be starting with and got to work.  I picked up my saw, and then before doing anything else I put it down again and looked at my watch.  Sawing could make a lot of noise, and I didn't want to wake up the neighborhood.  It was around 11AM though, so I figured no one would be too terribly bothered by my work.**

_I knew I was dreaming, but it was such a sweet dream.  Landon and I were walking along the dock where he took me for our first date.  We were watching the different boats and ships go by and the sun was just coming up.  He kissed me.  I could feel his hands caressing the sides of my face as I closed my eyes and lifted my lips to his.  In the background we could hear the sounds of the sea, the dinging buoys, the deep honk of the tugboat and the pounding of a hammer?  _

_I opened my eyes and listened to the sound of pounding coming from outside my window. I was dizzy, but I told myself, 'I could do this…just stand up Jamie.  Why am I so hot?  My skin feels like it's on fire.  Landon?  Oh, Landon…I love you.'_

_I heard my father walk in, "Jamie?  What is that boy doing in the yard?"_

_'He's building my telescope daddy.  I told you he loves me.' _

_"Jamie what's the matter?"_

_'Daddy…daddy…'_

_"Jamie???"_

**I had just cut the first piece of plywood off when Reverend Sullivan appeared at an upstairs window.  He seemed pretty panicked.**

**"Landon, get up here as soon as you can!  It's Jamie!"**

**I dropped my tools and went straight for the door.  Luckily it was unlocked, and I ran upstairs to Jamie's room.  When I got inside, I saw the reason for all the agitation: Reverend Sullivan was kneeling on the floor, with Jamie crumpled over in his arms.**

**"I'll get the phone and call for help," I said after swallowing the immediate wave of panic.**

**"The phone's in the kitchen," Reverend Sullivan called out from behind me.  "Just call for emergency help.  We'll get a hold of her doctor at the hospital."**

**I paced around the living room while talking to the emergency operator.  'Stay calm, Landon' I told myself.  'You're not going to do any good if you can't calm down and tell them what's going on.'**

**"Yes, hello?  Yeah, we need an ambulance here right away.  It's my girlfriend, she has leukemia and she just passed out."**

**"All right sir, just stay calm and an ambulance will be there soon," the operator said.  "Just say on the line until they arrive."**

**"Okay, okay.  I can do that.  Please hurry."**

**It was probably only a minute or two before the sounds of sirens drew near, but it felt like an eternity.  I knew I should go up and check on Jamie, but her father was already there and I would just start to freak out if I was there too long.  Instead I waited by the door, and the minute the EMTs showed up I directed them upstairs to Jamie's room.  They got her on a stretcher and put her into the ambulance.  Her father climbed in after them.**

**"Landon, they're taking Jamie to the hospital.  You can meet us there if you like."**

**Was he kidding?  Of course I was going to meet him there!  The ambulance pulled away, and I ran for my car.**

_"Jamie, can you hear me?  I'm going to insert and IV in your arm, I just need you to stay still.  Try not to move."_

_"Let's get a CBC, Cell Count, a Com metabolic panel, full chem.…."_

_"Jamie?  I'm going to be drawing some blood now…"_

_"She's losing consciousness again…"_

_"Jamie can you stay with us?  Jamie?"_

_I couldn't stay awake.  I could hear them, but I couldn't answer.  _

_I opened my eyes to darkness; Landon was sitting by my side, holding my hand.  I was parched, my mouth was dry, and my head was anything but clear.  "Lahnn…"_

_"Shhhh, baby," he kissed my hand and lifted his tear streaked face to mine._

_"Thirsty," I could barely speak._

_He held my head up and helped me to take a sip of water.  I could feel myself slipping away again even before he put my head back down on the pillow._

_"Lie with me, Landon," I wasn't sure if I just thought it or said it.  I closed eyes and didn't awake again until morning._

**I followed the ambulance to the hospital, and then I parked my car in the visitors' lot and went straight to the emergency room desk.**

**"I'm here to see Jamie Sullivan, she was just brought in."**

**The receptionist did some looking through a written file, and then checker her computer.**

**"She just came in, they're doing some tests right now.  You can wait for them over in the hallway there."  She pointed down a long hallway, and I saw Reverend Sullivan sitting in one of the seats along the wall.**

**"Thanks," I said to the receptionist.**

**I was almost shaking as I walked down the hall.  Jamie couldn't be leaving me already.  It just wasn't right.  I felt like I was about to get cheated out of something extremely dear to my heart.**

**"How is she?" I managed to choke out when I got there next to her father.**

**He just shook his head.  "I don't know, Landon.  I don't know."**

**We sat there in silence for what seemed like forever, and finally the doctor walked out of Jamie's room.  Reverend Sullivan stood up.**

**"How is she, Dr. Rosen?" He asked.**

**"She's getting worse," was the reply.  "She's resting now and we've given her some medications.  I'm not sure yet exactly what will happen, so we're keeping a tight watch on her for the next twenty-four hours or so.  Hopefully she'll come out of it, but…"  He didn't need to finish the sentence.  We all knew what he would have said.**

**"Doctor, can I see her?" I asked.**

**He gave me a look, and I realized he didn't know who I was.  "Yes son, you can see her.  Just be careful in there, we've got a lot of equipment set up and quite a few lines running.  Make sure you don't disturb any of them."**

**"I'll be careful."**

**I pushed the door open and walked into the room.  The lights were dimmed, but I could see Jamie's face from the glow of the monitors and instrument panels.  Despite all that was happening, she looked so peaceful as she slept.  Her doctor's words kept echoing in my mind.**

**'Hopefully she'll come out of it, but…'**

**I pulled a chair up to her bed and sat down next to her.  I put one hand over hers.  I smiled when I felt the warmth of her skin against mine, I knew she was still here with me.  But how long would she stay?  I didn't care, I finally decided.  I would sit there with her all night if I had to.  As I sat there watching her, I realized just how helpless I felt.  'Is this what it's going to be like?' I wondered.  'Am I going to have to just sit around and watch her die?'  I tried to hold back the tears, but they wouldn't be contained.  I started crying, right there at Jamie's bedside.**

**Almost as if she had heard me, I heard Jamie trying to say my name.**

**"Shhhh, baby," I said to her.  I didn't want her to strain herself trying to talk.  I kissed her hand, and when I looked up I was overjoyed to see that she was awake.**

**"Thirsty," she whispered.**

**I turned around, and there on her bedside table was a glass of water.  I lifted her head up and held the glass to her lips.  She took a few sips, and then she closed her eyes again.  As I was laying her head back down, I heard her say, "Lie with me Landon…"**

**I set the glass of water on the table and I carefully climbed onto the bed next to her.  After I had settled in, making sure not to touch any of the tubes and wires coming from the instruments, I whispered to her "I love you Jamie."  I fell asleep lying there next to her.**

_I could hear my father's voice in the back of my head waking me from my peaceful slumber, "Landon.  Go home son."_

_"I'm not tired."_

_"I just need a minute with her."_

_I lied there with my eyes closed, straining to open them.  I felt Landon's lips press up against my hand and his heard his gentle words.  My eyes finally opened as I turned my head to look at his bowed head, "I'll be back, okay?"_

_" 'kay."  _

_My heart ached as I watched him leave, but I knew he needed his rest and my father wanted to speak with me.  I could always tell when he had something on his mind. His face would always have such a concerned look about it.  "Daddy," I pouted my lip a bit.  "So serious."_

_"Do you remember when you were about 5 or 6? And you said you hated gravity and you wanted to jump off the roof and fly?"  He needed to relive my childhood with me, to go back to a time when life was less complicated and I was all his and no one else's.  
  
"I was so angry at you for making me come down."  
  
"Honey, if I kept you too close, it's because I wanted to keep you longer."  He was speaking about Landon.  I knew it.  It was his way of apologizing for not believing in him the way that I did, for trying to sway me against being with him.  
  
"Dad."  I wanted to let him know that it was all right, everything would be okay.  
  
"You know, when I lost your mother. I was afraid my heart would never  
open again. Jamie I couldn't look at you for days. But then…"  He lifted up his face and smiled at me so completely.  
  
"I love you so much." _

_He clasped my hands and put his head down against them, crying his 'I'm sorry' over and over again.  I placed my hands upon his head and whispered to him, "Daddy, it'll be okay.  I won't leave you yet. I promise.  I'm not going anywhere yet.  I've still got a lot left on my list I need to get done."  He lifted his tear streaked face to me and smiled.  I was starting to fade in and out again, but before I fell asleep I there was something I had to ask of my father, "Daddy…I need you to do something for me."_

_"What is it?"_

_"Mommy's book…"  
  
_

**Reverend Sullivan needed to talk to Jamie the next morning, and even though I told him I wasn't tired I realized just how tired I was when I walked out into the hallway.  I looked back in the door, and Jamie seemed to be doing alright and having a good conversation with her father.  I figured I could afford a little bit of sleep.**

**I got out to my car and as I was driving home, I was seized again with the sudden urge to stop at the church.  I didn't go into the back this time, I just sat there on the steps in front of the main entrance.  I should've gone home to sleep, but something was calling me there.  I sat on the steps for probably half an hour or so, when I saw Reverend Sullivan pull his car into the parking lot as well.**

**'Is he here because he saw my car, or because something called to him too?' I wondered.**

**"Landon, I thought you were going to get some rest?" he asked when he saw me sitting there.**

**For a minute I thought about making some smart-aleck remark on how I was resting by sitting, but I decided not to.  I did, after all, want Reverend Sullivan to take me seriously.**

**"I thought I was going home too… but then I felt this urge to come here."  I knew it probably sounded crazy.  "Was there a church service today?"**

**"I called some of the more active parishioners yesterday.  They got the message out that I wouldn't be able to hold a service today."  He looked at me a long time, like he wasn't sure what else to say.  Finally he broke the silence, saying "I know how you feel, son.  I've had the feeling many times in my life."**

**It was then that I realized he had called me "son" twice already, all in one morning.  "Reverend, can we talk awhile?" I asked.**

**He looked surprise, but said to me, "Sure Landon.  Why don't we go inside?"**

**We sat down at the front row of pews.  "So what did you want to talk to me about?"**

**"Well," I began, "I know you don't trust me very much and you probably aren't too fond of me either.  But I wanted you to know that Jamie is everything I have these days.  I wouldn't have believed it if someone had told me a few months ago, but I'm totally in love with your daughter.  That day when Jamie stopped running lines with me for the play, I felt so empty and hollow when I got home.  I realized that my life to that day had been aimless and that I was getting nowhere.  And when Jamie told me she loved me, I felt like God had given me a second chance.  That he …" I stopped, because tears were welling up in my eyes and I couldn't go on.**

**Reverend Sullivan put a hand on my shoulder.  "Landon, let me tell you something.  When Jamie first agreed to help you with your lines for the play, you were right, I didn't trust you and I thought you were the worst person she could have chosen to spend her time with."**

**"Do you still feel that way now?" I asked him.**

**He shook his head slowly.  "No, I don't.  That night after the carnival I thought that maybe I shouldn't have trusted you, but I'm beginning to think that I was wrong about you.  The Landon Carter I thought I knew wouldn't have stayed by Jamie's bedside all last night.  And he probably wouldn't have felt called to this church now."**

**"So you understand then, how much I love your daughter?"**

**"Perhaps.  I know that this isn't just some immature infatuation."**

**"You know about Jamie's list of things to do with her life, don't you?"**

**"Of course I do, Landon.  She shared it with me when she first made it."**

**"I want to make her number one come true."**

**He stopped and looked at me, running a hand through his hair.  "Landon, I… I don't want you to do anything out of pity for my daughter.  She doesn't need that kind of…"**

**"It's not about pity, Reverend," I cut him off.  "It's about love.  I love Jamie.  I want to marry her."**

**"Marriage is a serious commitment Landon.  I know that you have strong feelings for my daughter, but I don't think you're ready to be making this kind of decision!  You've had a lot of stress, I think you need to get some rest and calm down."**

**I stared at him, not sure whether to argue or not.**

**"Look Landon, I don't want you to get hurt and I don't want my daughter to get hurt.   I just don't want you getting yourselves into a painful marriage."**

**Normally I probably would have argued, but he was right.  We had both been under a lot of stress, and now wasn't the time to fight over something like that.  At least I got my message out to him.  I could come back to it later.**

**"Alright, sir.  I'm going to go home and get some rest.  Will you be staying here?"**

**"I'll be here awhile longer.  Go ahead and get some sleep son."**

_"Jamie?"  I heard a soft voice trying to stir me from my slumber, "Jamie.  I'm going to have some of the equipment removed and let you try to eat a little something today."_

_As I opened my eyes I saw my doctor standing before me, talking to some nurses.  "Dr. Rosen?"_

_"Ahhhh, there you are.  How are you feeling?"_

_"Pretty good.  A little tired."_

_"That's from the medication, but we're adjusting that so you won't be so groggy all the time."_

_"Okay."_

_"We're going to be removing the oxygen as well as the catheter and then, if you'd like, you can get out of bed and freshen up a bit."_

_"I'd like that, but I don't know if I can do it by myself."_

_"Don't worry sweetheart, I'm here to help you," said one of the nurses that was preparing a syringe.  "You might feel a little burning and stinging from this," she injected a fluid into the tube._

_"What is it?"_

_"It's just a saline flush to clear the tube.  Now I'm going to administer…"_

_I closed my eyes as she went through the procedure, explaining it step by step and tried to keep my mind off of the stinging sensation that was going through my veins.  _

_Thoughts of Landon filled my head, his smile, his touch, his kiss.  We had been through so much over these past few months—made it over so many obstacles: My father, our friends, my leukemia. I realized at that moment how grateful I was that he was sticking by me through all of this.  It got me to wondering though…we had spent our entire lives with each other, we essentially grew up together, yet we never knew one another until a few short months ago.  'Did You send him to me?' I began to ask God in a silent prayer.  'If so, then thank You.  I don't think I could've made it this far without him.'  _

_I remembered our first date and the walk we took along the water.  I could still feel his hand in mine, smell the salty air._

_"How can you see places like this, have moments like this, and not believe?"  _

_"You're lucky to be so sure."  I walked ahead of him, as he reluctantly let go of my hand.  _

_I stood there looking over the water and marveled over God's beauty, "It's like the wind…I can't see it, but I can feel it."_

_"What'd you feel?"_

_"I feel wonder and beauty…joy…love.  I mean, it's the center of everything."_

_"Jamie, would you like to get cleaned up now?"  The nurse's voice pulled me out of my stupor._

_"Yes.  Can you help me?"_

**Later that afternoon, I was sitting out on my porch.  I had just gotten up from a long nap and was just getting ready to go see Jamie again.  Then I saw Belinda coming towards my front steps and I stood up to greet her.**

**"Hi," she said nervously.**

**"Hi."**

**She handed me a small envelope she had brought along.**

**"I meant to give you these.  Pictures from the play," she explained.**

**I held the envelope in my hands, not sure if I wanted to look inside or not.**

**"I'm sorry about the fliers!" Belinda blurted out.**

**"Hey, it doesn't matter," I reassured her.  It had mattered when it first happened… but now, I just felt it would be petty for me to hold grudges.  Life was too short.**

**"Yeah…" Belinda sighed.  "I guess you're with who you should be.  It's like she chose you."**

**"Yeah, I don't even know why."  I really didn't know.  Somehow Jamie just saw the good in me that no one else knew was there.**

**"I do," Belinda replied, sounding like she was holding back tears.  Before I knew what was going on, she pulled me in and kissed me on the cheek.  The next thing I knew, she was running down my porch steps.**

**As I watched Belinda leave, I felt terrible all over again for how I had treated her when I broke up with her.  I had thought she was the worst person in the world when she was making fun of Jamie, but I guess… I guess she was in love with me all along.**

**I opened up the envelope of pictures and pulled them out.  They were in a folder, and after opening the folder and looking at the first picture I knew I couldn't go any farther.  What I had seen, a picture of Jamie and me sitting on stage right before she sang "Only Hope,"  was enough to bring me to the verge of tears.**

_After freshening up, my nurse helped me back into bed and I looked out the window towards the sky.  It was at that moment that I felt God's presence and I knew there was more in store for me than what I had bargained for.  There was so much more to life than what I thought.  In the grand scheme of things this life that I was living on earth could very well be just a quick glimpse of what eternity will be like.  That this time here is just the starting point of the greater journey and along the way we decide who and what we take with us to the ever after and again I thought of Landon.  I knew that one day we would be together forever and that nothing could ever hurt us again, but right now… _

_"Jamie, your father stopped by and dropped this off for you.  He's meeting with your doctor right now, but he'll be back soon,"  she said as she checked the IV flow.  "You get some rest now."_

_"Okay…thank you."  I picked up my mother's book and ran my hand over the cover thinking about my favorite passage from Corinthian's.  I had told Landon number one on my list so long ago, but I never told him that I wanted this read on the day I get married.  I began reciting it in my head as I closed my eyes to go to sleep.  'Love is always patient and kind…'_


	14. The Gift

The Lord's Plan  
  
By: kf6tac/Brian and Jamie Sommers  
  
Email: kf6tac@yahoo.com  
jamiesommers23@hotmail.com  
  
  
Rated: P/G 13  
  
Synopsis: Landon and Jamie have had their first date now they have to face their friends, their family and their own fears. From both Landon's (written in BOLD print by kf6tac/Brian) and Jamie's POV (written by Jamie Sommers in _ ITALIC _print)  
  
  
  
Chapter 14: The Gift  
  
  
  
_I could see myself sleeping in his arms underneath the tree at school; feel his breath stir my hair. The sun was warm on my face as my eyes fluttered open. I knew it was just a dream, but when I opened my eyes there he was, like my dream had come true and I thought, 'I could wake up every day for the rest of my life to the sight of you. I love you Landon.' He must have heard my sigh because he closed his magazine and came over to me.__  
__  
__ "Hey," he smiled. "How are you feeling?" He leaned over me and placed a kiss on my cheek.__  
__  
__ "I'm okay, how are you?"__  
__  
__ "Pretty good," he said as he got settled on the edge of my bed.__  
__  
__ "I have something for you."__  
__  
__ "You do?"__  
__  
__ "Mmmmm hmmmm," I leaned over and picked up the book my father had brought to me earlier in the day. I noticed Landon's questionable stare and said, " Don't worry it's not a bible. It was my mother's. It's got quotes from all her favorite books, and quotes by famous people. Her thoughts…" he bent his head down and kissed my hands. "Come on," I encouraged him to open the book to the pages I had marked.__  
__  
__ "Okay, let's check it out." He opened the book to the first marker and read, "What is a friend? A friend is a single__  
__ soul dwelling in two bodies. Aristotle."__  
__  
__ "Nuh uh. Here," I pointed to the quote that held special meaning to me and I wondered if he would understand the hidden meaning behind that passage.__  
__  
__ "Okay. Find out who you are and do it on purpose," from the look on his face I could see that he did in fact understand. __  
__  
__ 'I'm so proud that you finally found out who you were Landon and that you're not ashamed of it,' I thought.__  
__  
__ "It's Dolly Parton."__  
__  
__ "I always thought she was smart," I said with a smile. __  
__  
__ I watched him as he turned to the next marker within the book and closed my eyes as his voice filled the room, "Love is always patient and kind. It is never jealous. Love is never boastful or conceited. It is never rude…" I began saying it with him. "…or selfish. It does not take offense and is not resentful." __  
__  
__ Complete and utter happiness washed over me as his love filled my soul. There was a tugging in my heart--a need to share with him the discovery I had made earlier in the day. "You know what I figured out today?"__  
__  
__ "What?"__  
__  
__ "Maybe…God has a bigger plan for me than I had for myself. Like this journey never ends. Like you were sent to me because I'm sick…to help me through all this." I nuzzled my cheek into the palm of his hand as the realization hit me, "You're my angel." I could see the tears begin to well within his eyes as he kissed me.__  
__  
__ Our faces were so close together as he tried to speak, "Jamie…" I could see him swallowing the lump that was forming in his throat. His brimming tears caused his eyes to become magnified as his voice scraped, "I…was nothing before you." I lifted my hand to his face and brushed the tears that had spilled over onto his cheeks, away with my thumb. "It never dawned on me how empty I was until you were in my life." We were both crying openly now--not tears of sorrow, but of joy. "Jamie…you make me whole."__  
__  
__ "Oh, Landon…"__  
__  
__ He grasped onto the sides of my face and looked deeply into my eyes. "Do you know how much I love you Jamie?" __  
__  
__ I took a deep breath as our lips met in a warm and slippery kiss. "I love you so much Landon. So much." Our hearts were racing…pounding. Our breathing had turned from deep cleansing breaths to little shuddering pants. __  
__  
__ I could hear the catch of his breath and feel his tears as he kissed me again and again. "You're the love of my life Jamie Sullivan."__  
__  
__ We pulled apart to look into one another's tear filled eyes, "Oh…we're so lucky Landon. So lucky."__  
__  
__ "We're more than lucky Jamie…we're blessed." He laid his head on my shoulder as we clung to one another. __  
__  
__ My heart swelled with emotion and I whispered, "Yes we are."__  
_  
  
  
**When I got to the hospital that afternoon, Jamie was asleep. The nurse agreed to let me in her room as long as I didn't make too much noise.****  
****  
**** "Would you like some books to keep you busy while you wait?" she asked me politely.****  
****  
**** I glanced over to the table in the hospital room, and noticed there were a few magazines sitting in a pile. "No, it's all right. I'll just read whatever is over there."****  
****  
**** I sat down at the table and looked over the stack of magazines. There were a few issues of National Geographic, which I was never really interested in; a copy of some fashion magazine, another thing I never read; and finally there was the latest issue of Time Magazine. Time wasn't my usual type of reading material, but it was the best in the pile so I started flipping through it. I had just finished skimming an article on some U.S. Senator and was looking at the ads on the next page when I heard Jamie sigh. I looked over, and I was glad to see that she was awake.****  
****  
**** "Hey," I said to her as I got up and walked over to her bed. I gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. "How are you feeling?"****  
****  
**** "I'm okay," she replied. "How are you?"****  
****  
**** "Pretty good." I wasn't sure what I was going to say next, but Jamie took care of that for me.****  
****  
**** "I have something for you."****  
****  
**** "You do?" I knew she had been in the hospital all day, so I wasn't sure how or when she had managed to pick up something for me.****  
****  
**** "Mmm hmm." Then she handed me this book. It was pretty thick, and at first I thought maybe it was a Bible like the one she carried around. Now I know I'd talked to God a few times since I found out about her leukemia, but I wasn't sure what exactly I would do with a Bible just yet. I looked at her, and she just read me perfectly.****  
****  
**** "Don't worry, it's not a Bible. It was my mother's. It's got quotes from all her favorite books, and quotes by famous people. Her thoughts…" That was something I hadn't expected. I mean, it was her mother's book! I figured she would've wanted to hold on to it. I kissed her hand, and was about to tell her I couldn't possibly take it when she read my mind again and urged me to look at it. "Come on."****  
****  
**** "Okay, let's check it out." I opened it up, and Jamie had put these little markers on the pages she wanted me to read. I read out the first page. "What is a friend? A friend is a single soul dwelling in two bodies. Aristotle." I pondered that one for a little while, and I figured Aristotle was right. Jamie was one of my best friends, and she seemed to know me in and out. How else could things work like that?****  
****  
**** "Nuh uh, here." She pointed to a different quote. I read that one out loud too. "Find out who you are, and do it on purpose. It's Dolly Parton." I almost instantly figured out why she marked that quote for me. I had been so aimless before, I had no clue who or what I was. I would have just wandered my life away in Beaufort. I looked over at Jamie. It seemed like she had always known who she was, from the very moment I met her. And she had helped me find out about myself too. Sure, it had been uncertain along the way, but Jamie didn't give up on me.****  
****  
**** "I always thought she was smart," Jamie said, smiling.****  
****  
**** I turned the page over to the next marker and started to read. "Love is always patient and kind. It is never jealous. Love is never boastful or conceited." My first reaction was that this was a quote about Jamie. All this time, she had never been anything but patient with me. She never made any assumptions about me, never tried to hold herself up as a model. She was the only one who saw past my rough edges and understood who I really was inside.****  
****  
**** "It is never rude…" I continued, and Jamie began to whisper along with me. "… or selfish. It does not take offense and is not resentful." Jamie smiled when we finished that one together, and I smiled too. I was also deep in thought. Jamie had given her love to me unconditionally, with all the affection and sincerity she had. I guessed that she probably used that last quote to guide her when she was unsure. Up to that point, I didn't really have anything to work from. I had said I loved her and I was pretty sure I knew what it meant, but I never really took the time to give it full thought. Having read that, I decided that from then on Jamie would get nothing but true love from me - that I would do everything in my power to be patient and kind.****  
****  
**** "You know what I figured out today?" she asked me.****  
****  
**** "What?" ****  
****  
**** "Maybe…God has a bigger plan for me than I had for myself. Like this journey never ends."****  
****  
**** 'I hope this journey never ends, Jamie, because I want to be with you forever. I don't want to lose you so early. I want to spend what time we have now together… but I also want to see you again someday,' I thought to myself.****  
****  
**** "Like you were sent to me because I'm sick…to help me through all this."****  
****  
**** All I could think of was my line from the play, one of the many I had thought was so terrible when I first read it. 'Baby, believe me. You don't wanna go fallin' in love with a guy like me.' But yet… she thought I was sent to help her through everything. Only because she brought out the best in me.****  
****  
**** "You're my angel."****  
****  
**** I didn't know what to say to that one. When I was a kid I had built my whole "reputation" around people thinking I was the devil, and here Jamie was telling me I was her angel. I don't know what hit me, but something just washed over me when she said it. It was a good feeling… like I had finally done something right in the world. Tears started forming in my eyes, and all I could do was kiss her.****  
****  
**** "Jamie…" I choked out. The tears started to run down my cheeks, and I was barely able to tell her. "I… was nothing before you. It never dawned on me how empty I was until you were in my life." I could see tears running down her face too. "Jamie, you make me whole." I didn't know at that moment how I would live without her, without my other half… but it didn't matter. All I knew was that I needed to hold her and love her for as much time as God would give us.****  
****  
**** "Oh Landon…"****  
****  
**** "Do you know how much I love you Jamie?"****  
****  
**** "I love you so much Landon… so much" she managed over her tears.****  
****  
**** We kissed over and over again, and I finally was able to tell her "You're the love of my life Jamie Sullivan."****  
****  
**** "Oh… we're so lucky Landon. So lucky."****  
****  
**** I thought again about the quotes in her mother's book. I remembered what Jamie had told me about faith, both on the night of our first date and our first night together in the cemetery. Part of me at that moment actually wanted her to have given me a Bible. "We're more than lucky Jamie. We're blessed." I laid my head against her shoulder and thanked God for the wonderful woman I had right in front of me.****  
****  
**** "Yes, we are," I heard her say. As I rested there with my head against Jamie's shoulder, I noticed Reverend Sullivan watching us through the little window on the door. His eyes met mine for a moment, and then he turned and walked off.****  
**  
  
  
_My father and I had been reminiscing about my childhood when one of the nurses came in and said, "Excuse me, Reverend Sullivan, would you mind coming to the nurse's station for a moment. You have a phone call?" __  
__  
__ He was gone for a while and when he came back he was smiling from ear to ear. "Daddy? What is it?"__  
__  
__ "Jamie, you're not going to believe this."__  
__  
__ "What is it Daddy? Is everything okay?"__  
__  
__ "Yes everything's fine it's just…" From the look on my father's face I had thought that someone had found the cure for cancer. That wasn't the case, but it was the next best thing.__  
__  
__ "So he's going to pay for it? Isn't that expensive? Daddy, I don't think I can accept that."__  
__  
__ "That's what I told him Jamie, but he just wouldn't take 'no' for an answer."__  
__  
__ "But daddy…"__  
__  
__ "Jamie," my father held up his hands and said, "You're preaching to the choir. I already turned him down, but it seems that Mr. Carter has pre-paid for quite a bit of the services already."__  
__  
__ "Well then he should just get his money back."__  
__  
__ I listened to my father chuckle as he said, "It doesn't work that way sweetheart."__  
__  
__ "So whether or not I accept he's still going to have to pay for it?"__  
__  
__ "Seems that way."__  
__  
__ As thrilling of a prospect going home was, I just didn't feel right about letting Landon's father pay the bill for my medical care. "Daddy, I'm going to need to think about this for a little while. Do you mind?"__  
__  
__ "No, of course not. I've got some church business that needs tending to…"__  
__  
__ I kissed my father good-bye and lied there thinking about the situation Landon's father had put me in. On one hand, it was too good to be true. I could get all the medical treatment I needed and still be in the comfort of my own home. On the other hand, Landon had practically disowned his father years ago and I wouldn't want to hurt him by not taking his feelings into consideration. I thought back to a brief conversation Landon and I had on closing night of the spring play.__ We were standing back stage, enjoying some of the treats that the parents had brought in for us as sort of a 'cast party, when he came up to me and began talking to me. __  
_  
  
_  
__ "I see your father made it again."__  
__  
__ "Mmmmm hmmmm. I saw your mother, but didn't your father make it?"__  
__  
__ "Nah."__  
__  
__ "That's too bad."__  
__  
__ "Yeah, well…I didn't really expect him to come back after last night."__  
__  
__ "Why not?" I took a sip out of my glass of punch.__  
__  
__ "Let's just say he wasn't really welcome."__  
__  
__ I thought about it for a minute before saying, "You know Landon…one day you're going to regret not letting him into your life."__  
__  
__ "Yeah…I don't think so. Besides, he's the one that left me."__  
__  
__ "Did he, Landon? Or did he leave your mother?"__  
__  
__ "It's the same thing."__  
__  
__ "No it isn't. It's two completely different things."__  
__  
__ "How can you say that? He walked out on our family!"__  
__  
__ "Do you even know what happened between your parents?"__  
__  
__ "All I know is that he stopped loving us."__  
__  
__ I shook my head and said, "One day you just might see things from his point of view."__  
__  
__ "Yeah, well I wouldn't go holding my breath if I were you."__  
__  
__  
  
__ Making my choice to accept Mr. Carter's offer of private home care was easy once I started thinking about the effect it could have on his and Landon's relationship. I wondered, 'is today the day you start seeing things from your father's point of view Landon?'__  
_  
  
  
**Going to school on Monday was tough. I didn't want to leave Jamie's bedside, but I knew that I needed to go to school if I was going to make my to-do list come true. After all, I had promised myself that I would work hard enough to go to college and medical school. No one said much about Jamie at school. I figured everyone had heard what happened but didn't know what to do. I couldn't blame them. I really didn't know what else to do myself. After school I got in my car and drove straight to the hospital. When I got there, though, the nurse was wheeling Jamie out of her room in a wheelchair. She was all dressed and she had this big smile on her face.****  
****  
**** "Hey," I asked her. "What's going on?"****  
****  
**** "Landon, I get to go home!" she answered excitedly. "Please thank your father for me." The nurse wheeled her off before I could ask her to clarify that last part. It really made no sense to me. I hadn't heard from my dad since I was at his house that Friday night.****  
****  
**** "What did she mean?" I asked Reverend Sullivan, who was standing in the doorway of the now vacant hospital room.****  
****  
**** "Your father's been trying to reach you. He's gonna pay for private home care."****  
****  
**** I couldn't believe it. My father was going to pay for Jamie to have home care? All my life he had done nothing but send a child support check every month and suddenly… this? I wasn't sure what to make of it all, but first I drove to Jamie's house to make sure she got settled in all right.****  
****  
**** "Have you talked to your father yet, Landon?" she asked me. We were in her room, and I was helping move some of her stuff back into her closet.****  
****  
**** "No," I said after a long pause.****  
****  
**** "Well… _when_ you do, please let him know how thankful I am." She had said "when", not "if". Even though Jamie knew I rarely spoke to my father at all, she was in her own way urging me to talk to him now.****  
****  
**** After everything was set at Jamie's house, I got back into my car and started for my father's house. I still wasn't sure what to say to him.****  
**  
  
_  
__ "Hey. What's going on?" I knew he had no clue what was going on, he had been at school all day, and either way I seriously doubt that his father would try and tell him what he had done.__  
__  
__ "Landon, I get to go home!" I thought, 'please God let this work.' "Please thank your father for me." My nurse wheeled me out to my father's car and we left a befuddled Landon standing in our wake. __  
__  
__ Landon had helped me get settled back in at home, along with my father and my new nurse. As he was hanging up some of my clothes I asked him, "Have you talked to your father yet, Landon?" __  
__  
__ "No."__  
__  
__ 'This is it, Jamie,' I thought. 'He just needs a little nudge.' "Well… **when** you do, please let him know how thankful I am." _  
  
  
  
**I drove toward my father's house again, but this time I drove slowly. The night Jamie had told me about her leukemia I was definitely breaking the speed limit, but it wasn't the same. I couldn't even figure out what to say to him, so I took my time. I had to make an effort to stay focused on the road because of the dialogue I was having with myself. It was kind of like those cartoons on TV with the angel on one shoulder and the devil on the other… only I wasn't sure which one was the angel and which was the devil.****  
****  
**** 'Come on Landon, the guy walked out on you and your mom. You don't owe him anything. Just say thanks and leave.'****  
****  
**** 'He's doing this for you, Landon. He knows how much Jamie means to you and he wants to help. That means he cares, right?'****  
****  
**** 'If he cared, maybe he should have started showing it a long time ago.'****  
****  
**** 'He was at the play, right? He cared then. This isn't just a one-time act Landon.'****  
****  
**** 'If he cared he wouldn't have left in the first place. What kind of a father leaves his kid?'****  
****  
**** 'Did he, Landon? Or did he leave your mother?' Funny, that wasn't my voice in my head… it was Jamie's.****  
****  
**** 'It's the same thing.' My voice again. Jamie's got the soul of an angel, I know she does. So what does that say about the two voices in my head now?****  
****  
**** 'Do you want to trust this guy, Landon? All he does is send you checks every month. Are you going to let him off easy just because he decided to sprinkle a little money on you?'****  
****  
**** 'It's more than just "a little" money, Landon. Just hospital care is expensive, think about how much home care costs! This is about more than just money Landon, he cares.'****  
****  
**** Despite driving the speed limit and making full stops at every stop sign, I eventually made it to my father's house. By then I had decided that maybe he did care, but I wasn't going to let him off the hook for walking out on my mom and me. I had exactly what I was going to tell him planned out. I was going to thank him for helping Jamie, let him know that she was thankful too, and then I would leave.****  
****  
**** 'That's all, Landon, it's all you're going to do,' I kept telling myself as I approached the door. 'Simple. No-brainer. You've had spelling tests harder than this. So why can't you make your hand stop shaking and just ring the doorbell?'****  
****  
**** My dad opened the door, and even though I tried to just tell him what I had planned to say nothing would come out. I stuck my hands in my pockets so he wouldn't see that I was shaking. I hoped that he would say something, but I knew he had said it all when he decided to pay for Jamie's home care. I could feel my planned speech melting apart in my throat. I just stood there on his doorstep, and suddenly I realized how alone I felt. I didn't know what was going to happen to Jamie, and I was scared even though I tried to hide it. I didn't know where to go or what to do. Everything I had thought about on my way to his house was gone, the shoulder angel and devil were gone and it was just me; just Landon.****  
****  
**** "Thank you," I finally choked out.****  
****  
**** My dad took a step toward me, carefully. I could barely keep myself under control. I felt so scared, so lost… like a lost child. It was like the time I got lost in a shopping center when I was a little kid; I just wanted someone to find me and help me… I wanted my dad back. The tears in my eyes were spilling out now, and I instinctively wrapped my arms around my dad as I let out a sob. He was surprised at first, but then I felt him hug me tightly as I cried on his shoulder right there in the doorway.****  
****  
**** After I calmed down a little bit, we went inside and my dad made me a cup of coffee. We were sitting in the living room, neither of us saying anything.****  
****  
**** "Dad, I…"****  
****  
**** "Landon, I'm…" we both started at the same time. ****  
****  
**** "Go ahead," I told him.****  
****  
**** "I'm sorry I haven't been a great father Landon. I know I haven't always been there for you… but I hope you know that I still love you."****  
****  
**** "Then why did you leave me?" I said through clenched teeth.****  
****  
**** "I didn't leave you, Landon. I wanted to have some custody over you too, but that would've meant so much time in court. Your mother and I couldn't agree on how to divide our time, and you were too young… we didn't want you to go through all that legal mess. I'm sorry you didn't understand."****  
****  
**** 'So Jamie was right…' I thought to myself. "So you didn't leave because of me?"****  
****  
**** "No, of course not Landon. Your mother and I didn't always agree or get along, but that doesn't mean I don't love you! You're still my son."****  
****  
**** I put my cup of coffee down on the table and held my head in my hands. How could I have been so wrong? "Dad, I'm so sorry for blocking you out of my life. I didn't know… I… I just figured that you didn't want me. I never listened to mom when she tried to explain because I was so convinced…" I started to cry again.****  
****  
**** "Landon, it's okay. I'm just glad to have you back."****  
****  
**** I spent about another hour there at my dad's house, just talking. I told him that I wanted to be a doctor, which made him pretty happy. I talked to him about Jamie, how it all started with that terrible mess we got Clay Gephardt into and resulted in the whole play and everything afterwards. He heard about our first date, Jamie's star, her to-do list… everything but my plans to marry her. I hadn't really gotten anywhere with that one when I talked to Reverend Sullivan, so I figured I'd keep it under wraps for the time being. When I left, I thanked him again for all that he was doing for Jamie.****  
****  
**** "Thanks again, dad, for all that you've done for Jamie. It really means a lot to us."****  
****  
**** "You're welcome, Landon. It's the least I could do for you."****  
****  
**** I got into my car, and I leaned against the steering wheel as I watched my dad go back into his house. 'Thank you, Jamie, for all that you've done for my dad and me. It really means a lot,' I thought as I started the car and drove off.****   
  
**Coming soon...  
Chapter 15**  
**


	15. Written In The Stars

The Lord's Plan 

By:  kf6tac/Brian and Jamie Sommers

Email:  kf6tac@yahoo.com

            jamiesommers23@hotmail.com

Rated: P/G 13

Synopsis:  Landon and Jamie have had their first date now they have to face their friends, their family and their own fears.

Chapter 15:  Written In The Stars 

I didn't get much time after Jamie went home from the hospital to work on her telescope.  I had planned to get to work, but things got really tight between schoolwork, graduation rehearsals, a few AP exams, and spending more time with Jamie.  I usually ended up just sitting with her in her room, or reading some books from Mr. Rothman's list with her.  It was another two weeks before I got back to the telescope.  I had checked every astronomy web page I could find and read just about any books on comets in the school library, and as far as I could tell Hiakutaki would be coming around that weekend.  Building a telescope turned out to be not as straightforward as I originally thought, but thankfully I had bought plenty of extra materials to work with in case I made a mistake.  Of course I still had to go to school during the day, so every evening after I was done with my homework I was over in Jamie's yard working.

_He came everyday after school to read with me, sit with me or work on my telescope. I tried to encourage him to study for his exams but he would just say, "Don't worry. I'll study when I go home."_

_I heard the sounds coming from outside and I knew that today he would be spending time on my telescope. I stood on my balcony and watched him. Banging, sawing and yelping seemed to become normal noises on any given weekday. He smacked his thumb with the hammer again. _

_"Landon, are you all right?"_

_"Yeah Jamie, everything's fine.  Just a little bad aim with the hammer.  Go on inside and get some rest, I'll be okay."_

_"Landon, would you come up here and sit with me for a while?" I wasn't supposed to have visitors in the house when daddy wasn't home, but lately he'd become a little more lenient when it came to his rules. He looked up and I knew he was going to argue with me but before he could present his case I said, "Please?" I really needed to talk about something that had been on my mind for a while now._

**"OUCH!"  It was Wednesday evening, and I had just hit my thumb with a hammer for what must have been the tenth time that night.  I looked up and saw Jamie standing out on her balcony.  She must have heard my exclamation.  'Good thing I didn't swear,' I thought to myself.**

**"Landon," she called out weakly.  "Are you alright?"**

**"Yeah Jamie, everything's fine.  Just a little bad aim with the hammer.  Go on inside and get some rest, I'll be okay."  She had been pretty weak since she went into the hospital, and I didn't want her to wear herself out worrying about me.**

**Instead of going inside though, Jamie asked me to sit with her inside.  I was a bit uncertain; I knew her father wasn't around and that I wasn't supposed to be inside.  She wouldn't let me argue though, and she sounded like she really wanted to talk so I put my tools down and went up to her room.**

_He sat on the edge of my bed and talked to me about school, his pending exams, his mom...everything, from the tiniest detail about having to stop at the store to buy pens on the way home to graduation._

_"Landon? I've been thinking about something lately..." I wasn't sure how to broach such a sensitive subject._

_"What is it baby?"_

_"Well, it dawned on me that...we seem to help each other an awful lot. You know...we talk about our problems, concerns...we're friends."_

_"We're more than friends. We're best friends," he leaned his head down, placing a kiss on the back of my hand and smiled into my eyes. "I've been so busy lately that you seem to be my only friend," he chuckled. _

_"Yes, I've noticed. Which is kind of where I'm going. See...I realized that right now I'm going through the hardest thing a person could go through in their life, but it's not so bad because...well...I have you. But when I go...I won't be here to talk about it with you and that kind of bothers me. I keep thinking about things like that lately...thinking about my friends, my family...you, and I can't help but wonder who you'll talk to when I die." I raised my eyes to his and felt an ache in the pit of my stomach._

_"Uh...I...uh...I don't know. My mom I guess. Maybe my dad. I don't really know."_

_Tears were starting to fill his eyes and I hated myself for causing him so much pain. "Don't cry."_

_He swallowed and said, "I won't." We were silent for a few minutes before he said, "I'm going to miss you Jamie. I'm going to miss seeing your face everyday, hearing you sing, making you laugh."_

_"I'm going to miss you too." I brushed a tear off of his cheek with my thumb and said, "You said you wouldn't cry."_

_"Sorry." He backhanded his eyes and sniffled. "It's just hard sometimes."_

_"I know. It's hard for me too." We were quiet for a brief moment, "Do you think you could talk with Eric or Dean?"_

_"Nah...they're good friends and all, but..."_

_"Well there's always your father, but he's kind of far away."_

_"Yeah..." He began to chuckle one of those sad laughs. "You know, for a guy that was considered one of the most popular kids in school... I can't even think of one person that I can call a true friend."_

_"Oh, Landon," I didn't believe that for one second. "There must be someone you can confide in. Someone that'll be there for you."_

_"Sure. My mom...but it's gonna be hard for her too afterwards so..."_

_"Are you telling me you can't think of anyone? Out of all the people you know, you can't think of one person you can talk to.  One individual that you can bring your problems to?  There has to be someone that you'll feel comfortable talking with?  What about…" We could hear the resounding echo of my father's footsteps on the stairs giving us no choice but to leave our conversation unfinished._

_"Landon," he greeted him somewhat curtly, but he wasn't quite as bad as he could've been._

_"Reverend," Landon stood up to leave before my father could ask him to leave. "I suppose I should get going." He leaned over and kissed my forehead whispering, "I love you."_

_"I love you too."_

_"I'll see you tomorrow."_

_" 'kay."_

_"Good night Sir," Landon nodded at my father as he made his way towards the door._

_"I'll see you out, Landon."_

_"Thank you, Sir. Good night, Jamie."_

_In the morning my father brought me a tray with some breakfast on it and said, "Landon called last night, but you were asleep."_

_"What did he say?"_

_"He said you asked him a question last night and to tell you, he thought of someone…God."_

**After Reverend Sullivan had walked me out, I stopped at my workbench and realized just how much work I still had left to do.**

**'Couldn't this comet show up a week later or something?' I thought to myself.  'Maybe it's better this way, Landon.  You've got to start studying for finals sometime, or UNC is going to rescind your acceptance.  So just get back to work… it'll all work out for the best.'**

**I was pretty tired on Thursday morning, and I could barely stay awake in my classes at school.  I was back at Jamie's house that evening though, hammering and working away.**

**The comet was supposed to pass by Sunday evening, but at 11:30 on Saturday I was still trying to get the body of the telescope finished.  I hadn't even put in the mirrors yet.  For some reason I couldn't get a certain measurement to work out right, and while I was out there scribbling calculations in my note pad the porch light came on and I heard the door open.  I heard Reverend Sullivan step out and he started walking towards me.  I knew it was a little late to be doing work outside, but I needed to get this done.**

**"Listen, I've gotta finish this tonight," I told him as he approached.  I thought he was either going to tell me to go home or to let him finish it up.  I couldn't do either one.  He had offered to help a few times before, but I told him that it was something I needed to do on my own for Jamie.**

**To my surprise, Reverend Sullivan brought with him a lantern and a mug.  "Here," he said, setting the mug down in front of me.  "Something hot."**

**"Okay, well I'm almost finished with the rocker.  Did she order the mirrors?"**

**"Yeah, they're in here," he replied, pointing me to a little shed.  As we started walking toward the shed, he asked me "What are you going to use for the side bearings?"**

**"I'm using an old phonographic turn table."  He didn't object, so I figured my idea would work.**

**"You think you'll get all of this done by tomorrow?"  He sounded worried.  To be honest, I was too, but I knew I would finish that telescope.  That comet was not going to pass without Jamie getting her chance to see it.  It meant too much to her… to me.**

**"I'll go without sleep if I have to, but this telescope will be done tomorrow evening.  Jamie deserves to see the comet."**

**We brought the mirrors out from the shed and I went back to work.  Reverend Sullivan watched me for a while, and apparently decided that I would be okay and he went back inside.**

**I worked late into the night and early into the morning.  The most difficult part turned out to be getting the mirrors set just right into the telescope, but with a little help from books, I was able to do it.  When I was finally done, it was almost three in the morning.  I put everything away and looked around.  Beaufort was a small town and we weren't prone to graffiti and stuff like that, but I wanted to make sure that everything was set for Jamie and even though I was exhausted, I woke up Reverend Sullivan and asked him for help carrying it up to the balcony before I headed home.**

**He agreed to help me carry the telescope upstairs, and as we were carrying the pieces I decided to raise the issue of marriage again.  "I wanna ask her to marry me," I told him.**

**He stopped in the hallway and sighed.  I knew he had probably been thinking about it for the few weeks that had passed since I brought it up in the church.  He didn't say anything though, and I wasn't sure if I had convinced him yet or not.**

**As we set everything up I said, "I love her Sir and I'm going to ask her with or without your blessing.  I'd rather ask her with it."**

**Reverend Sullivan still didn't say anything, and I knew I had to be completely open and honest with him.**

**"Reverend, I love her.  In my heart, Sir, she's already my wife."**

**"Is this really what you want, Landon?  The doctors say she…"**

**"I know what the doctors say, Reverend, and I don't care.  I want Jamie to be my wife."**

**He looked me straight in the eye, and a sad smile crossed his face.  "You have my permission, Landon.  And my blessing."**

**"Thank you, Reverend."**

_ "Hey."_

_"Hi," I was lying in bed when he got to my house.  I had been feeling a bit under the weather and thought it best if I rested while waiting for him._

_"You okay?"_

_"Uh huh.  I'm just a little tired."_

_He held onto my hand and guided me up.  "I won't stay long.  Let's just check out your comet then you can get back into bed.  'kay?"_

_"Mmmkay."_

_"Come on."_

_He held his arm around my waist as we walked onto my balcony.  "I can't believe you actually did this for me," I put my arms around him and hugged him loosely._

_"I'd do anything for you," he whispered in my ear.  _

_We pulled back a little but still held onto one another, "Thank you."_

_"You're welcome," he whispered._

_"It's beautiful," I looked at my telescope that he had built for me and felt the depth of his love._

_"Okay it's time.  Go check it out," he encouraged._

_"Okay," I was so excited.  I had dreamt of this for so long and I was sure I was going to miss it, but Landon…Landon made sure that I didn't.  He made sure I didn't miss out on a lot of things in my life._

_"Okay."_

_As I looked through the eyepiece I noticed how many stars seemed to be out tonight, and they looked so close, like I could just reach out and touch one.  I looked out towards the evening sky noticing how perfect it was tonight, like heaven was smiling down on us.  Looking through the eyepiece again I made some adjustments thinking, 'I know you're out there somewhere.  Why can't I find you?'  Then… "…wow…there it is."  It was beautiful.  "Come here.  Come look," I wanted Landon to see it too.  I moved away from the telescope so he could, "Come here…come look.  Quick."  As I sat down I couldn't keep my eyes off of the sky, it was so amazing to me.  I hoped Landon could see how magnificent this was too._

_"That is cool," he laughed._

_Looking up at the sky I was again in awe of God's wonders.  They never ceased to amaze me.  He created such beauty, so many wonderful things.  The most miraculous one of all was sitting next to me.  _

_"Do you love me?"_

_I wanted to say 'more than life itself,' but all I could manage was, "Mmmmm."_

_"Will you do something for me then?"_

_"Anything."  It was true.  I would do anything he asked._

_"Will you marry me?"_

_My heart jumped inside of my chest.  I couldn't speak…couldn't breathe.  All I could seem to do was think, 'Oh Landon.  Yes,' I smiled.  'Yes, I'll marry you.'  He must've gotten my message because he smiled back and pressed his soft lips against my own.  _

_We looked into each other's eyes and smiled.  I loved him so much and I knew that even if I lived to be as old as Methuselah I would still love him like this but I didn't want him asking me because he felt obligated to make my number one to come true.  _

_"Landon.  Are you sure?"_

_"I've never been more sure of anything in my life.  I want you to be my wife.  I've known it since the day that you showed me around the back of the church.  The way the sunlight danced off of you just right, how everything seemed so perfect… I knew that I was totally in love with you and that nothing would ever change it."_

_"But that was before you knew I was sick…" I knew that if we went through with this, it would hurt him even more when it was my time to go._

_"I know.  But after you told me, the next day I went to the church.  No one was there, but I went to the back where they keep that room for the bride.  I was so lost Jamie; I didn't know what to do.  But I talked to God that day, and I asked him for just one thing – you.  I understand now that I probably can't have you physically here, but that I can still have what I asked for by marrying you."  He stopped to wipe the tears from his eyes.  "Please Jamie, please be my wife."_

_My hands cupped his elbows as I leaned down to kiss him again.  "I will Landon, I will," I whispered to him as our lips met.  I could taste the saltiness of my tears against his lips as our kiss grew into one of exploration.  _

_His hands were gently cupping my face as his mouth moved against mine.  "I love you Jamie."_

_"I love you too."  _

**When I got to Jamie's room, my heart was already pounding.  Her father had given me permission… not just to take her out, or even to love her.  He had given me permission to propose to her.  My mind was racing, but I knew we still had a comet to see.  When I opened the door and walked in, Jamie was in bed.**

**"Hey."**

**"Hi."**

**"You okay?" I asked her.  I didn't want to drag her out of bed if she seriously wasn't feeling well.**

**"Uh huh.  I'm just a little tired."**

**That reassured me, and I took her hand to help her up.  "I won't stay long.  Let's just check out your comet then you can get back into bed.  'kay?"**

**"Mmmmkay," she responded as we walked slowly out onto the balcony.**

**"Come on."**

**"I can't believe you actually did this for me," she said, giving me a hug.  Part of me still couldn't believe that I had finished it either – there were a few times I thought I was going to fall asleep at the work bench.  But it was done, and I was glad I stuck through it.**

**"I'd do anything for you," I whispered back.  If I could, I would have given any number of days of my life to let Jamie live longer.**

**"Thank you."**

**"You're welcome."**

**"It's beautiful," she said, looking at the finished telescope sitting on her balcony.  I hadn't been able to paint over the body, so it still had a brand name running across it.  I smiled, somewhat amused that it could still be beautiful.**

**"Okay, it's time.  Go check it out," I told her.**

**She walked slowly over to the telescope and began adjusting the knobs while she looked through the eyepiece.  I watched her and was mesmerized by her eagerness and anticipation; she still seemed so innocent and perfect despite all that had been happening lately.**

**"Wow… there it is," she said, when she had found the comet in the night sky.  After she watched it for a while, she turned and said to me "Come here, come look… quick."**

**We switched places, and she sat down on a chair while I looked through the telescope.  I had built the thing, but I never had the opportunity to look through it before I brought it up.  I was just glad that it worked.  And then I saw the comet, blazing its way across the sky.  I was at a loss for words… all I could say was "That is cool," followed by a laugh at how stupid I had just sounded.**

**I sat down next to Jamie and after a few moments, I asked her "Do you love me?"**

**"Mmmmm," she replied, smiling.**

**"Will you do something for me then?"**

**"Anything."**

**'All I need is one thing, baby… that's all,' I thought to myself.  I took a deep breath and tried to keep calm.  My heart was beating like I had never felt it beat before.  I looked back at Jamie and when I let my breath out, I asked her the question I had been building up to.**

**"Will you marry me?"**

**Her eyes widened and her smile got just a little bit bigger.  She didn't say anything, but I could feel her answer in my heart and in my thoughts.  I leaned in and kissed her softly.**

**"Landon, are you sure?" she asked when we pulled apart.**

**I knew what she was thinking… she didn't want me to marry her because I felt guilty or bound into it. **

**"I've never been more sure of anything in my life.  I want you to be my wife."  This was more than just something to help her put a check mark next to her number one.  My heart yearned for her to marry me.  "I've known it since the day that you showed me around the back of the church.  The way the sunlight danced off of you just right, how everything seemed so perfect… I knew that I was totally in love with you and that nothing would ever change it."**

**"But Landon, that was before you knew I was sick…" She still seemed doubtful.**

**"I know.  But after you told me, the next day I went to the church.  No one was there, but I went to the back where they keep that room for the bride.  I was so lost Jamie; I didn't know what to do.  But I talked to God that day, and I asked him for just one thing – you.  I understand now that I probably can't have you physically here, but that I can still have what I asked for by marrying you."  The tears in my eyes were running down my face, and I had to wipe them away before I could continue.  "Please Jamie, please be my wife."**

**This time she leaned in to kiss me.  "I will Landon, I will," I felt her say against my lips.  I could feel her joy and her love being passed to me, and mine being passed to her.**

**"I love you Jamie."**

**"I love you too."**


	16. Family Blessings

The Lord's Plan

By: kf6tac/Brian and Jamie Sommers

E-mail: kf6tac@yahoo.com

          Jamiesommers23@hotmail.com

Rated: P/G-13

Synopsis:  Landon and Jamie have had their first date now they must face their friends, their family and their own fears.  Written from Landon's POV by Brian (**in bold print) and Jamie's POV by Jamie (_in italics_).**

**Chapter 16: Family Blessings**

_My breath caught in my throat as he whispered in my ear, "I love you, Jamie."  My heart was racing, my smile beaming and as we looked at one another my father came out onto the balcony.  From the look on his face he knew something was up.  I wasn't sure what to say to him.  I wanted to tell him.  I wanted to scream it out from the rooftops, 'LANDON CARTER ASKED ME TO MARRY HIM!!'  But Landon apparently beat me to it._

_"She said 'yes'."_

_"Well, I wasn't worried.  Were you?"  My father replied with a smile_

_"Wait a minute.  You mean…" My eyes were darting back and forth between Landon's and my father's faces.  "Landon??"_

_"Well…I sort of figured I should ask for your father's permission first."_

_"You knew daddy?"_

_"Yes, I knew.  Excuse me a moment," he said as he went into my bedroom to grab a chair._

_I threw my arms around Landon's neck and kissed him hard on the mouth.  "I love you."_

_"Good.  I love you too," he laughed._

_My father sat with us and said, "You two both understand what this means, right?" We were both too happy to actually talk so we just nodded our heads._

_"Landon, have you informed your parents?"_

_"No sir.  I'll have to tell them soon, but I wanted Jamie to be there with me when I told them."  I squeezed his hand and felt him squeeze mine in response._

_"We can have them over for dinner here, daddy.  I can still help with…"_

_"No Jamie, you really don't have to do that," Landon interrupted.  "You're not in any shape to be doing work in the kitchen.  I can do some cooking, but not really enough to make a whole meal.  And it would be a lot of trouble for your dad.  Tell you what: I can talk to my mom about having everyone over at our place for dinner and I'll tell them then."_

_Daddy and I both protested a little, but Landon said something that had us both agreeing to his invitation._

_"Well… my dad will be there too.  My entire family hasn't been at the dinner table together since my parents got divorced.  I think it'll be fine.  Whatta ya think, Jamie?  Will you be feeling up to a trip to my place?"_

_It was like God had answered every prayer I had ever asked of Him all in one night.  Would I be feeling up to a trip to his house?  "I'll try, Landon.  I really will."_

**Jamie and I sat out on her balcony for a while, holding each other close and looking up at the stars.  Her father eventually came out there to check on us, and from the looks on our faces he immediately knew that I had asked Jamie to marry me and that she had said yes.  He pulled a chair up from Jamie's room and sat down with us on the balcony.**

**"You two both understand what this means, right?" he asked us.  We both nodded our heads in response.**

**"Landon, have you informed your parents?"**

**"No sir.  I'll have to tell them soon, but I wanted Jamie to be there with me when I told them."  I felt her give my hand a squeeze, and I squeezed back.**

**"We can have them over for dinner here, daddy," Jamie chimed in.  "I can still help with…"**

**"No Jamie, you really don't have to do that," I told her.  "You're not in any shape to be doing work in the kitchen.  I can do some cooking, but not really enough to make a whole meal.  And it would be a lot of trouble for your dad.  Tell you what: I can talk to my mom about having everyone over at our place for dinner and I'll tell them then."**

**"Landon, your mother already went through a lot of trouble for that meal we had a month ago," Reverend Sullivan added.  "Are you sure it will be alright?"**

**"Well… my dad will be there too.  My entire family hasn't been at the dinner table together since my parents got divorced.  I think it'll be fine.  Whatta ya think, Jamie?" I asked, turning to her.  "Will you be feeling up to a trip to my place?"**

**She smiled at me, and said, "I'll try, Landon.  I really will."**

**I got home at a pretty odd hour of the morning, and my mom was already asleep.  I didn't want to wake her up, so I got ready for bed and decided to ask her about dinner the next morning before school.**

**I ended up sleeping through my alarm though, so after getting myself dressed and having something to eat I bolted off for school.  Classes were going into "lame duck" mode where we did nothing all day, but I figured it would still be a good idea to get there on time.  When I got home in the afternoon, my mom was in the garden.**

**"Hey mom," I said as I approached her.  "Would it be too much trouble if we had Jamie and her dad over for dinner sometime this week?"**

**"No, I don't see why not.  Friday night again?"**

**"Actually, I was thinking sometime a little earlier… maybe Wednesday?"  I didn't want to leave my parents in the dark about the engagement for that long.  "I've pretty much stopped getting homework, so as long as it's okay by you."**

**She thought about it for a moment, then replied, "I suppose I can prepare a dinner for four by Wednesday evening."**

**"Actually mom, it's going to be dinner for five."**

**"Oh?  Who else is coming?  One of the Reverend's friends?"**

**"I want to invite dad along too."**

**She stared at me wide-eyed before saying to me happily, "Landon, that's great!  I'm glad you're finally spending some time with your father."**

**"Well after all he's done for Jamie and me… I just couldn't be angry at him anymore."**

**"That's wonderful Landon.  You're really growing up.  I'll have dinner on the table for us all on Wednesday – you can count on it."**

**'You're really growing up.'  I hoped she would still say the same thing after Jamie and I made our announcement on Wednesday.**

_I woke up pretty early Monday morning considering I didn't get to sleep until sometime around 3am.  My first thought was, 'I feel pretty good today.'  My second thought was, 'He asked me to marry him.  Landon asked me to marry him.'  My heart fluttered within my chest, my breath caught and I squeezed my eyes closed just trying to take it all in.  I heard my father knocking on the bedroom door and I quickly got up and answered it.  _

_"Good morning daddy!"  _

_"Well!!  Aren't you chipper this morning?"_

_"Mmmmm.  I feel great today!"_

_"I supposed I don't need to ask why."_

_ I threw my arms around my dad and said into his chest, "Oh, daddy.  I've never been so happy."_

_"Jamie?  Are you sure this is what you want?  I don't want you saying yes just because you're afraid you'll never have this opportunity again."_

_Pulling back I looked into my father's eyes and wondered aloud, "Is that what you think daddy?"_

_After a minute of careful scrutiny he said, "No.  I think you and Landon love each other very much."_

_"We do," I said softly, laying my head against his chest.  "We do daddy."_

_"Well," he cleared his throat.  "We better hurry up and get going or we're going to be late for your doctor's appointment.  I'll bring up some breakfa…."_

_"No.   I'll come down for it.  But thank you anyway."_

_"Okay, if you're sure you're feeling up to it."_

_"I am."  _

_This was the first morning in weeks that I had woken up and not felt like going right back to sleep again.  I was in no way feeling well enough to go to school or anything, but I was able to go downstairs and eat breakfast with my father.  Something I haven't been able to do for a while now.  _

_The phone rang once before he picked it up, "Hello?"_

_"Hi," I said softly._

_"Jamie?"_

_"Uh huh."_

_"I was just thinking about you."_

_"Mmmmm what were you thinking?"_

_"I was thinking that I really miss you."_

_"I miss you too."_

_"Feel like some company?"_

_"Actually, I'm pretty tired," I could hear the disappointment in his voice._

_"Oh, sure."_

_"I'm really sorry."_

_"Don't be silly.  I understand."_

_"There is something I need to talk to you about though.  It's kind of important."_

_"Uh, okay.  What is it?"_

_"My doctor thought it might be beneficial for me to try a new medication.  It's only in it's testing phase but it may help with my being tired all the time.  I was thinking that you'd like to help me make the decision on whether or not I begin taking it."_

_"You wanted my opinion?"_

_"Well…yes."_

_"Really?"_

_"Of course.  Why wouldn't I want your opinion?"_

_"Well, you've never asked me before…"_

_"Landon, if we're going to get married we're going to have to do a lot of things we've never done before."  I could hear him smiling over the phone as we took the first step towards being husband and wife._

** "Hello?"**

**"Hey dad, it's Landon."**

**"Landon, how are you?  How's Jamie doing?"  He sounded really eager to talk.  I guess that made two of us.**

**"I'm doing great dad!  Jamie's been doing pretty well lately too.  Her doctor suggested some new medication today and we're hoping that it'll help her with not being so tired all the time."**

**"That's good to hear, Landon.  So what's new?"**

**"Well… mom and I are having Jamie and her dad over for dinner on Wednesday, and I was hoping you'd be able to make it too."**

**"I don't have anything on my calendar right now for Wednesday night, and as long as no emergencies come up at the hospital I'll be free.  I'll mark it down right now."**

**"Thanks dad!  That's all I needed to know – I'll let you get back to whatever you were doing."  I wondered if he could tell that he had just made my day.  It's not something that happened very often with my father, but I was hoping that would change.**

**"Alright son, thanks for inviting me.  I love you."**

**"I love you too, dad."**

**After I had cleared everything with both parents, I called Jamie's house.**

**"Hi Reverend, this is Landon."**

**"Landon… Jamie is asleep right now."**

**"Well I won't disturb her now, Sir.  I just wanted to let you know that both of my parents are alright with dinner on Wednesday evening at my place."**

**"Very good, Landon.  Jamie and I will be there."**

**"Thanks Reverend.  Please let Jamie know I love her when she wakes up."**

**"Oh and Landon," he added as I was about to say goodbye.**

**"Yes?"**

**"I talked to Jamie earlier already, so I thought I'd also ask you to start thinking about who you want as your best man for the ceremony."**

**"Right, I'll start figuring that out.  Thank you."**

**After I hung up the phone, I stood there figuring out what to do about the best man situation.  'Eric?  Dean?' I wondered to myself.  Would they even take this engagement thing seriously?**

_It was a beautiful night.  I could see Landon and his father walking outside as my father and I pulled up and as I watched him from across his yard, I realized how very much I missed him these past few days.  We hadn't seen each other since the night he proposed, although we had spoken to each other several times on the phone, it just wasn't the same as being with one another.  _

_"Hi," I wanted to put my arms around him and kiss him so badly, but it wouldn't be appropriate considering our parents were right there._

_"Hi.  Jamie.  Reverend Sullivan.  This is my father." As Landon was making the introduction his mom came out carrying a tray with some food on it._

_"Jamie! Reverend!  You're here."  She set the tray down and grabbed me in a hug.  "How are you?  Landon says you're trying something new for your fatigue?  Is it working?  And Reverend, we're so happy you could make it this evening.  Now I've got just a few more things to get from the kitchen…perhaps you men would like to help me?"  _

_Once again I fell in love with Landon's mother.  She was so intuitive.  As she herded our fathers into the house Landon and I stepped into one another's embrace.  _

_His lifted his hand and cradled my face whispering against my lips, "I've missed you."_

_"I've missed you too."  _

_"…so much…missed you so much," he continued whispering against my open mouth._

_His lips never closed, they just brushed back and forth over mine and I thought, 'Just kiss me, Landon.  Please.'  My fingers dug into his arms just as his mouth closed over my own.  My heart sighed as my arms went around his neck.  His lips opened over mine as he kissed me over and over again until finally he pulled me closer to him and broke it off.  _

_I could feel his rush of breath blowing out against my cheek.  "Pheeeew.  Sorry about that.  I just…"_

_"Mmmmm.  Don't be sorry," I pulled back so I could look into his eyes.  "I'm not."_

_"You're looking well this evening.  In fact…you're looking really good."_

_"Mmmm, thanks.  I'm feeling better too."_

_"That's great!  I'm glad you could make it."_

_"So when are you planning to tell them, Landon?"_

_"I was thinking during dessert.  I wouldn't want to shock them and take away their appetites, since my mom makes a killer dinner."_

_I could hear the slight tremor in his voice so I tried to ease his concern, "Don't worry Landon, I'll be sitting right there next to you."_

**Wednesday evening came quickly.  I was pretty nervous, sort of pacing around in my room.  My mom was downstairs putting the finishing touches on the dinner setting.  Since the weather was warming up and the days were longer, we had decided to eat outside.  There was a table set up in our backyard, a little ways off from the water.  I stayed in my room until my dad, who was the first to arrive, got there.  I was pretty much just figuring out how I was going to make this announcement without making a fool of myself.  It wasn't exactly something I had done before.**

**I went downstairs to greet my dad, and as we were walking out to the backyard Jamie and her father arrived.  I had to admit that Jamie was looking better than she had been for quite awhile.  **

**I brought my dad out front to greet Jamie and Reverend Sullivan.  After I had introduced them to each other, my mom walked out the door carrying another tray (the third or fourth I think) of food.  She practically lit up when she saw that Jamie and her father had arrived.**

**"Jamie! Reverend!  You're here," she said, putting the tray down and giving Jamie a hug.  "How are you?  Landon says you're trying something new for your fatigue?  Is it working?"  That was just my mom, lively and always ready to talk.  "And Reverend, we're so happy you could make it this evening.  Now I've got just a few more things to get from the kitchen…perhaps you men would like to help me?"**

**I looked to my mom when she asked for help and was about to step toward the house when she gave me this look that just said, 'Not you, _them.'  I tell you, my mom is brilliant._**

**After our parents vanished into the house, I wrapped my arms around Jamie and pulled her close to me.  I kissed her hair, inhaling deeply the smell of fresh flowers.**

**I lifted her face up in my hands and whispered against her lips, "I've missed you."**

**"I've missed you too," she whispered back.  **

**The feeling of her lips moving against mine was sending tingles across my skin.  I had seen her on Sunday, but it felt like sooooo much longer.  'It's not easy being separated from your new fiancée,' I thought to myself.  'Not easy at all.'**

**"… so much… Missed you so much…" I continued to say to her.  Every time my lips brushed hers, it was like a little taste of heaven… I felt a sense of urgency from Jamie though, and as she began to squeeze my arms harder I covered her mouth in a kiss.  She let go of my arms and put her hands around my neck.  I knew our parents would be expecting us for dinner very soon, but I just couldn't bring myself to break off the kiss.  Not just yet.  I kissed her again and again, until that feeling of being away from her had disappeared and all that was left was… happiness.**

**I broke off the kiss, slowly toning it down until our lips parted after one more light brush.  I exhaled, letting out with my breath the tension that had built up the past few days.**

**"Sorry about that," I started to apologize.  "I just…"**

**"Mmmmm.  Don't be sorry," she said, looking into my eyes.  "I'm not."**

**"You're looking well this evening.  In fact… you're looking really good."**

**"Mmmmm, thanks.  I'm feeling better too."**

**"That's great!  I'm glad you could make it."  I didn't know if I would have been able to tell my parents without her there too.**

**"So when are you planning to tell them, Landon?"**

**"I was thinking during dessert.  I wouldn't want to shock them and take away their appetites, since my mom makes a killer dinner."**

**I think my nervousness showed through my little joke, because Jamie gave me a hug and said "Don't worry Landon, I'll be sitting right there next to you."**

**Smiling, I took her hand and led her out to the backyard where everyone else was waiting.**

**"I hope we didn't keep y'all waiting," I said to our parents when we got to the table.  They were already seated.**

**"Oh not at all, we just sat down," my mother responded with a smile.**

**"Alright then, let's get started."  I pulled Jamie's chair out for her and set her napkin in her lap after she was seated.**

**"Thank you Landon," she said to me, giving me another reassuring smile.  I smiled back, getting lost for a moment in her eyes before my father pulled me back to reality.**

**"Son, if I didn't know better I'd say you were training to be a waiter at some fancy restaurant," he joked, apparently in response to my 'chair and napkin' routine.**

**"I'll keep that in mind, Dad," I chuckled as I took my own seat.  "Maybe that's how I'll work my way through med school."**

**Dinner was, once again, a showcase of my mom's cooking skills.  We had a little bit of everything, from soup and salad to some really great salmon.  Of course I was getting really nervous by the time my mom brought out the desserts.  Jamie must have felt my leg moving as I tapped my left foot against the grass, because she put one hand on my leg and slowly stopped my movements.**

**Soon everyone had some sort of pastry in front of them and the two dads were drinking coffee.  I looked over at Jamie to let her know I was going to make the announcement, and she nodded knowingly back.  I wondered how I was going to get everyone's attention… just start talking?  Do the old "clearing my throat but really I want attention" trick?  I looked over at my dessert fork that was sitting on the table, and then at my half-filled glass of water from earlier.**

**'What the heck?' I thought to myself.  'They do it in the movies.'**

**I tapped the fork a few times against the glass of water.  Everyone turned their heads to see what I was making noise over.**

**"I uh… I wanted to thank everyone for coming tonight.  It really means a lot to me."**

**"It was a great idea, Landon," my dad replied.**

**"Thanks dad.  Jamie and I also have an announcement to make."  Everyone was silent this time, obviously waiting for me to tell them what it was.**

**I looked over at Jamie once more before finishing.  "Jamie and I, we're getting married."**

_I suppose there really wasn't any easier way of saying it than the way he did and I knew they would be shocked, but I never expected his mother to react the way she did.  "You're what??"  She had been the one person that had supported us throughout our entire relationship, but when it comes right down to it Landon is her son and no matter how old he is, he'll always be her little boy._

_He tried to explain it to her, to let her know that the reason for his asking and my accepting wasn't due to my failing health but our growing love. "Please, hear me out on this one mom.  Ever since I really got to know Jamie my life has changed.  She's made everything better for me.  She has faith in me.  I feel like I finally know where I want to go after all these years.  If it weren't for Jamie, I'd still be that drifting teenage boy who spent a night in jail a few months ago.  If it weren't for Jamie, I would never have accepted my dad back into my life.  I love her, and I want her to be my wife."_

_I couldn't let him go through this alone so I stood up and explained my reasoning as well.  "And I feel the same way about Landon, I really do.  Before I had him, it was like I really didn't have anyone to turn to.  My father was always there, but there are some things that you just can't say to a parent.  And my friends didn't know about my leukemia – the only person I could talk to about everything was God.  Even with Him there, I felt so alone sometimes.  Landon changed all that for me.  Now whenever I need someone, I know I can count on him to be there.  Had it not been for Landon, I don't know what I would have done.  I might have just given up after the play when things got difficult."  I looked at Landon and said, "I love him so much, he's the answer to all my prayers."_

_We just looked at one another and after a minute he put his arm around my waist joining us together in front of the trio._

_Landon's father was the one that broke the silence.  "I know I haven't been here for a lot of Landon's life, and it seems to me that he's changed a lot during those years I missed.  I don't quite understand it all myself, and this does seem a little rushed but…. I guess if they really love each other as much as they say they do…"_

_"How can you say that?  They're both so young still!  I understand that they're in love with each other, but marriage?  Landon still has so much of his life ahead of him!"_

_I know she didn't mean it the way it sounded and she probably didn't even realized what it was she had said, but the reminder had hurt.  I felt Landon's grip on me get tighter as if trying to reassure me._

_"Please mom, I love Jamie more than life itself.  I don't want to let her go without being able to celebrate our love like everyone else.  Please.  We can't afford to wait while life passes us by."_

_She looked back and forth between the two of us and after a minute she looked at him as though he were a completely different person._

_Both of his parents questioned him and his decision._

_"Dad, I already have thought about this.  I've thought about this for a long time now.  I love Jamie with all my heart and soul.  Even after she is gone, our marriage will never end.  Never."_

_The depth of his love never ceased to amaze me.  _

_"Reverend, you don't have any objections to this?" his mother asked._

_"Landon and I discussed this before he asked Jamie to marry him.  I've already given them my approval."_

_"Well Landon, Jamie… it would seem that you two are quite in love with each other.  If this is what you feel is right, then I'm not the one to say otherwise.  You have my blessing," his mother said with a genuine smile._

_"You have my blessing too.  I'm not going to stand in the way of your marriage.  You two are wonderful for each other, and I don't question the strength of your love.  Congratulations, and I wish you the best."_

_His arms encased me and he twirled me around in a circle.  We began to laugh into each other's ears.  We're getting married._

**"You're what???" my mother said loudly.**

**"Please, hear me out on this one mom.  Ever since I really got to know Jamie my life has changed.  She's made everything better for me.  She has faith in me.  I feel like I finally know where I want to go after all these years.  If it weren't for Jamie, I'd still be that drifting teenage boy who spent a night in jail a few months ago.  If it weren't for Jamie," I said, looking over to my father, "I would never have accepted my dad back into my life.  I love her, and I want her to be my wife."**

**"And I feel the same way about Landon, I really do."  Jamie had stood up beside me and now it was her turn.  "Before I had him, it was like I really didn't have anyone to turn to.  My father was always there, but there are some things that you just can't say to a parent.  And my friends didn't know about my leukemia – the only person I could talk to about everything was God.  Even with Him there, I felt so alone sometimes.  Landon changed all that for me.  Now whenever I need someone, I know I can count on him to be there.  Had it not been for Landon, I don't know what I would have done.  I might have just given up after the play when things got difficult.  I love him so much, he's the answer to all my prayers."**

**We stood there in silence for a few moments.  I reached back and slipped my arm around her waist as we waited for my parents' response.**

**My father spoke up first.  "I know I haven't been here for a lot of Landon's life, and it seems to me that he's changed a lot during those years I missed.  I don't quite understand it all myself, and this does seem a little rushed but…. I guess if they really love each other as much as they say they do…"**

**"How can you say that?" my mother shot back before he was finished.  They're both so young still!  I understand that they're in love with each other, but _marriage?  Landon still has so much of his life ahead of him!"_**

**I saw Jamie's pain when my mother mentioned only that I had so many years ahead of me.  I squeezed her closer to me, telling her in my thoughts 'It's okay baby, it'll be alright.'**

**"Please mom, I love Jamie more than life itself.  I don't want to let her go without being able to celebrate our love like everyone else.  Please.  We can't afford to wait while life passes us by."**

**My mother looked at me, and I could see tears in her eyes.  "Landon, are you sure?  Is this really how you want it to be?"**

**"Landon, son, think hard about this.  It was terribly difficult for me to voluntarily break off my marriage with your mother.  Do you really want a marriage that will be ended with our without your approval?"**

**"Dad, I already have thought about this.  I've thought about this for a long time now.  I love Jamie with all my heart and soul.  Even after she is gone, our marriage will never end.  Never."**

**I turned to see Jamie with a surprised look on her face.  I realized then that she must have been expecting me to find someone else after she was gone.**

**"Reverend, you don't have any objections to this?" my mother asked Reverend Sullivan.**

**"Landon and I discussed this before he asked Jamie to marry him.  I've already given them my approval."**

**My mother looked back at my father, and eventually they nodded their approval to each other.**

**"Well Landon, Jamie… it would seem that you two are quite in love with each other," my mother said to us.  "If this is what you feel is right, then I'm not the one to say otherwise.  You have my blessing."**

**"You have my blessing too," my dad added.  "I'm not going to stand in the way of your marriage.  You two are wonderful for each other, and I don't question the strength of your love.  Congratulations, and I wish you the best."**

**I turned to Jamie and pulled her into my arms, lifting her up and twirling her in a circle on the grass.  I was so happy I could barely keep myself from laughing.**

**After dinner, I helped my mom clean up all the dishes while Reverend Sullivan and my dad took some time to get to know each other.  Jamie spent most of the evening on the couch, talking to my dad as well.  She was smiling the whole time, and I knew that I was probably grinning like an idiot myself.  I just couldn't help it.  It was a smile that reached all the way to the bottom of my heart and back again.  God had granted my prayers.  Jamie and I were getting married.**

**After all the dishes were put away, everyone gathered in the living room and just talked.  A little while later, my dad looked out the window and noticed it was getting dark out.  He glanced at his watch, and stood up to excuse himself.**

**"I'd love to stay and chat some more with everyone, but it's getting late and I need to be in the hospital pretty early.  I had a great evening, thanks so much for inviting me."**

**"Hey dad," I called to him as he reached the door.  "Hold up a sec and I'll walk you out."**

**We walked toward the car, our shoes grinding softly against the pavement of my driveway.**

**"Thanks again for coming tonight, Dad.  It meant a lot to me."**

**"It was a pleasure Landon.  Congratulations to you and Jamie.  I'm proud of you."**

**"Thanks."  There was a brief pause as my dad opened the door to his car.  "Dad?"**

**"Yeah Landon?"**

**"I was wondering if you'd be my best man at the wedding."  I had thought about it for a long time after Reverend Sullivan had broached the subject, and I eventually decided that the person I wanted up there with me was my dad.  He had done a lot to make sure Jamie and I could be together when everything seemed stacked against us.**

**"Oh Landon," he began.  "I couldn't.  I've missed out on so much of your life, I'm sure there's someone else…"**

**"This is one thing I don't want you to miss, Dad.  Please?"**

**"I would be honored to, Landon."**

**"Thanks Dad."  I reached out and gave him a big hug.**


	17. Home Is Where The Heart Is

The Lord's Plan 

By: kf6tac/Brian and Jamie Sommers

E-mail: kf6tac@yahoo.com

          Jamiesommers23@hotmail.com

Rated: P/G-13

Synopsis:  Landon and Jamie have had their first date now they must face their friends, their family and their own fears.  Written from Landon's POV by Brian (**in bold print) and Jamie's POV by Jamie (_in italics_).**

This chapter is dedicated to Megan for all of her friendship, love, support, hope and most of all for encouraging us to go on.  Megan…thank you for everything.

**Chapter 17: Home Is Where The Heart Is**

**Friday was the last day of school.  I got up early and drove over to Jamie's house.  It was the first time since she went into the hospital that I was there to pick her up for school.  It brought back memories of the Monday after our first date, the very first time I had taken her to school with me.  I had been so scared of her dad when he opened the door… now even I feel kind of silly about it.  But that look he gave me when I showed up… oh man… I was glad I hadn't seen that look for a while.  When I showed up at Jamie's house, her father was at the door to greet me.  And not just opening the door like he used to do – he was out on the porch waiting for me.**

**'A lot has changed in these few months,' I thought to myself as I walked up the front steps.**

**"Good morning, Landon.  How are you?"**

**"I'm doing good Reverend, thanks."**

**"Jamie asked me to keep you company while she got ready.  She says she won't be long."**

**"Oh, that's fine," I told him.  "I know I'm early anyways.  I'm sure we'll be on time."**

**We sat on the porch for a while, talking about some of the details for the wedding.  A few minutes before Jamie came downstairs, I pulled a piece of paper out of my back pocket.**

**"Reverend, I'd like you to take a look at this," I said, handing the paper to him.**

**After looking over the paper, he asked me, "So this is it?"**

**"Yeah, my parents and I have already talked about it.  They're getting it taken care of on Sunday."**

**"Landon, they don't have to do this.  I can…"**

**"It's alright, Sir, it is.  They've already said this is something they want to do.  I want to do it too."**

**Just then we heard Jamie's footsteps as she approached the front door.  She looked well – really well.  Those new medications were doing her a lot of good.**

**"Hey!" I said to her happily, giving her a hug and a kiss on her cheek.  Her father had lightened up a little about our displays of affection since we became engaged.**

**"Hi Landon," she said amidst giggles.**

**"You ready to go?" I asked her.**

**"Yeah, just give me one second."  She gave her father a hug and kissed him goodbye.  "Bye daddy.  I'll be back this afternoon, right after school."**

**She and I walked down the front steps hand in hand, and I opened the passenger door of my car for her.  After she had gotten in, I shut the door and turned to give a wave to the Reverend.  He waved back, and looked down again at the paper I had handed him.  I got into the driver side and Jamie and I started out for our last day of high school.**

**A few streets down, we came to a stop sign.  I stopped, but instead of proceeding forward I looked in my rear-view mirror.  There were no cars approaching from behind us or at the other three streets of the intersection, so I leaned over the center of the seat and kissed Jamie.  It wasn't anything long or passionate, but it was enough to let her know that I still thought the world of her.  She smiled when I pulled my lips away from hers, and I felt her hand cradle my cheek as she leaned forward for another kiss.**

**"There," she said when she pulled back.  "One for you… and one for me."**

**I smiled at her reference to my words from our cemetery date.  I licked my lips and faintly tasted the flavor of her lip balm.  "Cherries today?  Getting a little adventurous," I joked with her as I continued our drive to school.**

**"I got a little tired of the regular kind.  I figured this one wouldn't be too strong."**

**"You were right.  I like it."**

**She laughed in response to my comment.  It was a happy, energetic laugh – and it made my heart swell to hear her feeling better.**

**When we got to school, people immediately noticed that Jamie was back.  The first to get to us were Sally and Megan.  They had been walking across the parking lot toward the schoolyard when we pulled up, and it seemed like they were in front of us almost as soon as Jamie had gotten out of the car.**

**"Jamie!  You're back!  It's so good to see you!" Sally exclaimed.**

**"Yeah, we missed you a lot," added Megan.**

**"Thanks," Jamie said with a smile.  "It's great to see you too."**

**And so it went for the rest of the day.  I'm sure she heard a lot of questions from everyone.  "How are you feeling?"  "What are you up to?"  "You going to graduation this weekend?"  None of them knew that we were engaged yet.  I wasn't sure how we were going to tell people.**

**We ate lunch at Table 7, one more time.  We hadn't been there since our very first day at school as a couple… but it was still special to be able to eat there with Jamie on the last day of school.   We cleaned out lockers before our last class of the day.  I had taken advantage of my study hall time in the library to get all of our books returned, so all we really had to do was collect up the papers in the locker (mostly mine) and put them in the trash.  I walked Jamie to drama before heading off to my own class.**

##

_It felt good to be back in school, even if it was just for the day.  There were so many people I wanted to say goodbye to, so many friends I needed to see and one person in particular I needed to talk to.  _

_"Um…Miss. Garber?"_

_"Jamie!" She grabbed me in an embrace and said, "I'd heard that you were here today.  Feeling better?"_

_"Yes actually."  _

_"Well that's marvelous.  Simply marvelous."_

_"Uh…Miss. Garber, can I talk to you privately for a minute?"  I don't know why I was nervous…I guess it wasn't really nerves, it was more like anticipation.  Outside of our families, Landon and I hadn't shared our engagement with anyone.  Things were about to change._

_We walked over the edge of the stage and were immediately greeted by some of my other classmates.  "Jamie, welcome back."  "Hey, it's great to see you."  "I knew you wouldn't be able to stay away."  I talked with them for a couple of minutes then Miss. Garber, sensing my eagerness, asked them to excuse us so that we could talk privately._

_The edge of the stage was dusty; I looked around at the backstage area and thought about the night of the play.  How the stage had been bustling with excitement.  People dressed as though they stepped out of another era.  Music playing.  And laughter…I could hear the remnants of laughter echo through my memories.  I turned to look at Miss. Garber and I immediately knew she was the right choice._

_"Thank you Miss. Garber."_

_"For what dear?"_

_"Everything," I smiled.  "You're my favorite teacher."_

_"Well," she looked around to make sure no one was listening to us.  "Don't tell anyone, teachers aren't supposed to have favorites, but if I had to pick one student that represented everything good and fine in a person….that would be you Jamie."  She followed in a hushed tone, "You're my favorite too."_

_We shared a conspiring smile and then I asked her.  "Miss. Garber?  I was wondering…well…Landon asked me to marry him and…"_

_"What???  Oh my Jamie!!!  That's wonderful.  What did you say??"_

_I could feel the blush creeping up my cheeks as I thought about Landon's proposal, "I said yes, but I have a slight problem and I was hoping you could help me."_

_"Of course dear.  I'll do anything I can."_

_"Well I sort of need a maid of honor and I was hoping you would do it."_

_"Oh Jamie.  I'm flattered, but wouldn't you rather one of your friends…"_

_I shook my head at her interrupting her mid-sentence.  "No.  You're the one I want to stand up there with me.  When Landon and I…see…" I didn't know how to explain it to her.  How to tell her that she was the reason I let him back into my life.  The reason I finally pushed my pride to the side and welcomed Landon into my heart fully so I opted for the truth._

_"He and I would've never gotten this far if it wasn't for you.  You were the one that made me take a look at what was inside of me, what I was denying and I could never thank you enough for that.  That afternoon you came to my house and talked to me…" we both knew what afternoon I spoke of.  "…it made me think.  Really think."_

_"What about?" she asked as she laid her hand gently on my own._

_"Him.  Landon," I knew I was getting that far away look in my eyes.  The one that accompanies every thought I have of him.  "He came to my house the next night," I reminisced.  "He brought me a present," a smile lifted my heart.  "I knew when I held that sweater up that I would never be able to live without him in my life.  He's my reason for being…for living.  He's my soul," I looked into her tear filled eyes and said, "I would really love it if you would be a part of our day."_

_"I would be honored.  Thank you."_

_We hugged each other and talked a bit about the date, my dress…little things that I would've shared with a mother or a sister had I had one.  As class came to a close Landon came to pick me up and before leaving I asked Miss. Garber if I could tell everyone._

_"May I have everyone's attention please?" she called out.  "Jamie and Landon would like to make an announcement."  She looked over at us and said, "Go ahead Jamie."_

_I held onto Landon's hand and smiled up into his eyes before sharing our joyous news.  "Landon and I are getting married."_

##

**I walked into the drama room just as everyone was shuffling around getting ready to leave.  It was the last day they would be in there, so there were plenty of people picking up old costume parts, props, and other items that had been left behind during the school year.  When I walked over to Jamie and took her hand, I had this weird feeling that something was up.  Then I heard Miss Garber's voice.**

**"May I have everyone's attention please?  Jamie and Landon would like to make an announcement.  Go ahead Jamie."**

**It didn't take me long to figure out what was going on.  Jamie was going to tell everyone.  I think that was about when the little trembling started.  I don't know why I was so nervous.  'People are going to find out eventually,' I told myself.  'Might as well get them started now.'**

**Jamie smiled at me before continuing on, and I felt my worries melt away.  "Landon and I are getting married," she announced happily to everyone.**

**There were a few surprised gasps in the room, and then somewhere in the group of people the applause started.  Within a few seconds the entire room was cheering and clapping.  I could feel myself turning red as a tomato, and when I looked over at Jamie she was smiling happily and blushing too.  Eddie Zimmerhoff came over, gave Jamie a hug, and shook my hand.**

**"Congratulations you two.  You're going to be great together."  Everyone else started following his lead.**

**"This is wonderful!  I can't wait for the wedding."**

**"You two are a match made in heaven."**

**"I'm so happy for you!  Oh this is so exciting!"**

**Sally gave Jamie a great big hug, but when she got to me she stopped.  I thought for a minute she was going to start giving me grief for everything I had done the past year.**

**"Landon, I was wrong about you," she surprised me.  "I know you'll take great care of Jamie.  You two deserve to be happy together."**

**I wasn't quite sure what to say.  I was certain Sally wasn't going to take this well.  She seemed to dislike me a lot before.  "Thanks Sally, that means a lot coming from you."**

**She smiled before wiping a tear from her eye and giving Jamie another hug.**

**Fifteen minutes later, Jamie and I finally escaped the crowd of happy drama students and got into the schoolyard.  As we were walking to my car, I saw Dean, Eric, and the rest of my old crowd gathered in their usual spot.**

**'Jamie's friends accepted this… will they?' I wondered to myself.  'I guess there's only one way to find out.'**

**"Jamie, I'd like to tell Eric and them about the engagement.  Can you come with me?"**

**"Of course Landon," she told me with a smile.  "I'll be right there beside you."**

**"Hey guys," I said as we approached the group.**

**"Hey Landon, what's new man?"  Eric asked.**

**I looked at Jamie, then back at them.  "Jamie and I are getting married."**

**There was silence as they looked at me, then at Jamie, then back at me.  Just as I was starting to get nervous, a huge smile crossed Eric's face.**

**"Heeeeeeey, that's great news man!  Come here and give your buddy a big hug!"  Eric almost tackled me, he was so excited.  Then he gave Jamie a hug too, although not nearly as forceful as the one he gave me.  I looked around, and everyone else had pretty much formed a little circle around us and they all seemed really eager to congratulate us.**

**'See Landon?  That wasn't so bad.'**

**Belinda was the last one to talk to me.  She gave me a hug, but not the kind she used to give me… she didn't try to purposely brush up against me anymore.  This was a genuine hug from a friend.**

**"Landon, I'm so happy for you."  She took a deep breath and looked at Jamie.  "You deserve someone as good as her."**

**"Thanks Belinda."**

**She turned to Jamie and gave her a hug.  I saw Belinda whisper something in Jamie's ear, and the two smiled to each other.  It was good to see that Belinda and Jamie were finally getting along.**

##

_It was obvious to me that Landon was a bit nervous about telling his friends.  They hadn't exactly been very receptive of our dating so I'm sure he figured their reaction to our engagement would be along the same lines.  _

_I held onto his hand as he announced it to them.  "Jamie and I are getting married."  _

_There was dead silence amongst the group until Eric decided to be his natural self and grabbed Landon in a huge hug, then me.  All of us exchanged hugs and well wishes and as we were leaving Belinda and I hugged each other and she whispered in my ear.  _

_"Hey," he said as he pulled the car away from the school.  "What did Belinda say?"_

_I wasn't sure what to say to his question.  Do I tell him or do I keep her secret safe with me.  I opted for the safest alternative.  "I'd tell you, but then I'd have to kill you."_

##

**After I dropped Jamie off at her house, I hurried back to my place.  My parents and I still had some business to take care of.  My mom was on the phone when I walked in the door.**

**"Oh Worth, hold on, here he is.  I'll have him get the other line."  Then she covered up the receiver and said to me, "Landon, your father is on the phone.  Go grab the other phone upstairs and we can talk to him about what we're going to do."**

**I ran upstairs and got on the phone from my room.  "Okay guys, I'm here.  So what's the plan so far?"**

**"Hi Landon," my dad said.  "Here's what we have so far: we're going in on Sunday to sign the contracts and get all of the paperwork taken care of.  They'll give us the keys then, and the house will be all yours."**

**"That's great!"  Jamie had always wanted to own a home – it was on her list.  Number fifteen, to be exact.  And now she would have it.  My father was actually the first to bring up the idea.  One of his regulars was a real estate agent, and he caught wind of a house for sale in one of the newer residential areas in town.  He called me and told me that he was going to get it for us as a wedding gift, but I insisted that we split the cost.  I knew my dad made a lot of money as a doctor but… after already paying for Jamie's home care I couldn't let him buy a house all by himself.  Reverend Sullivan had offered to help with the costs when he found out about our plan, but both my father and I refused.**

**"What about getting all the stuff in there for the wedding?" my dad added.  "We can move Landon's stuff easily, but it'll be hard to get Jamie's belongings over there without her noticing."**

**"I have an idea for that, actually."  My mom this time.  "I was thinking that I could invite Jamie to stay at my place the night before the wedding.  We could put Landon up in a hotel room in town, since he's not supposed to see his bride before their wedding anyways.  That way you men and Reverend Sullivan can get all of Jamie's things to the new house and she wouldn't find out until the newlyweds go home."**

**"What do you think Landon?" my father asked.**

**I thought about it for a while, and it seemed to be the best option available to us.  Jamie and my mom got along really well anyways.  "I think it'll work."**

**"Great!  So I'll see you two tomorrow morning at the graduation ceremony?**

**"You bet dad.  And dad, thanks again."**

**"It's a pleasure Landon.  See you in the morning."**

##

_Graduation day.  It was a big day in a town the size of Beaufort, but for me…well, I couldn't wait for the Saturday that followed.  My wedding day…our wedding day.  _

_I looked at the two invitations that were sitting on my dresser.  One for Landon's graduation and the other for our wedding and I contemplated my life and how a few months ago I would've been devastated when I realized that I wasn't going to be able to graduate with the rest of the senior class.  Principal Kelly offered to let me take some make up courses but there was just too much for me to do with the wedding coming up.  I just didn't have enough energy for all of it.  Now things were different.  My priorities in life seemed to have changed so dramatically since Landon came into my life.  _

_So when my father and I left our house to meet Landon's family at the high school, I entered it not as a former student, but as the proud fiancée of Landon Carter.  _

_He looked very handsome in his cap and gown and came up to me as soon as we arrived.  _

_"Jamie!"_

_"Hi!"  We walked into each other's arms and held onto one another as though our lives depended on it.  _

_'One more week,' I thought.  'Just one more week and it'll be our wedding day.'_

_His hands framed my face as his lips found mine and he placed a gentle kiss upon them.  "Do you realize that in one week we'll be getting married?"  I couldn't help but smile as he said my unspoken thoughts about our wedding day.  _

_The graduation ceremony went off without a hitch and afterwards we all went out for dinner.  It was just the family.  'The family,' I thought.  'That sounds so good.'  It had been just my father and I for as long as I can remember, but now…now we were a family and as we arrived at the restaurant I felt my heart quicken at the sound of Landon's voice.  "Carter, party of five."  That's when it hit me.  I'm going to be a Carter.  _

_We enjoyed our dinner and talked about our upcoming nuptials.  I have to say I was a bit surprised at Landon's mom's suggestion, but I was flattered and tempted._

_"…so you can stay in Landon's room and then the next morning we'll get you ready together.  It'll be a girl day.  We'll even invite Miss. Garber over in the morning.  We can go to the church early and…."_

_She rambled on and on as Landon leaned over and whispered in my ear.  "Just one more week and she'll be your mother-in-law.  Betcha can't wait."_

##

**Graduation on Saturday morning was a great time, but really for the most part my mind was occupied by Sunday, the new house, and of course the wedding.  When Jamie hugged me that morning, all I could think about was that in another week… she would be my wife.  It was a wonderful feeling, and as I thought back that day on all that had happened in the past years, I was thankful that it had brought Jamie and me together.**

**Our two families, _the family, had dinner together after the graduation ceremony.  It was there that my mom brought up her idea of having Jamie over the night before the wedding.  I couldn't help but smile as she tried to "sell" the idea to Jamie.  My mom seemed so giddy and excited; I could've sworn I was listening to a girl planning her first slumber party._**

**"…so you can stay in Landon's room and then the next morning we'll get you ready together.  It'll be a girl day.  We'll even invite Miss. Garber over in the morning.  We can go to the church early and…."  She just went on and on.**

**"Just one more week and she'll be your mother-in-law," I whispered to Jamie.  "Betcha can't wait."**

**Jamie just smiled and leaned her head gently against mine for a moment before deciding to take my mom up on the offer.  I knew there wouldn't really be any trouble at all between Jamie and my mother – the two of them got along famously.**

**The next morning my parents and I went to the real estate office to close up the deal on our house.  The agent had my parents sign the papers, and then they passed the contract and the pen to me.  My hand was shaking slightly as I put the pen to the paper.  'This is it Landon, you're about to get your first house.'  I tried to keep my signature steady and when it was all done, I blew out a breath and leaned back in my chair.  I knew that getting the house was a good thing, but it was still a big investment and it was a little nerve-wracking.  The agent looked the papers over, and tucked them inside a manila folder.  He tore off a carbon copy and handed it to my parents.  Then he took the keys to the house out and slid them across the table.**

**"Here you are, the keys to your new house.  Congratulations."**

**I looked at my parents, then back at the keys on the table.**

**"Go ahead Landon," my dad prompted me.  "They're yours."**

**I took the keys in my hand and looked at them again for a moment before giving both my parents a big hug.**

**"Thanks you guys… thanks so much."  Shaking the realtor's hand, I said to him "And thank you Mr. Evers, for helping us get this taken care of."**

**We drove immediately over to the house, even though we had walked through it many times when we were taking a look at it.  I started planning how we would get all of my things and Jamie's things situated.  About half an hour later, Reverend Sullivan showed up in his car.**

**"My," he said when he looked inside the house.  "This is a wonderful home."**

**"Jamie deserves the best, Sir," I told him honestly.  "We're going to start bringing over my things as soon as possible.  Once Jamie gets to my mom's house on Friday, we can start moving hers as well.  Come on, I'll show you the rest of the house."**

##

_This past week had been one that could drive a healthy person over the edge of insanity, but with Landon's mom and Miss. Garber's help, we got everything for the wedding taken care of.  Flowers, music, reception…the works.  Now all I had to do was write my vows. _

_Landon and I had decided to write our own wedding vows in addition to the traditional ones.  I knew he had already finished his; I on the other hand couldn't quite put what I was feeling down into words.  Saying I love you just didn't seem like enough.  I didn't know how to tell him that he was everything to me.  Loving him was all I had ever dreamed of and every minute we're apart is so painful…so…_

_I threw the pad and paper down on my dresser and got the rest of my things together.  It was the night before my wedding and I still hadn't written a word.  'Maybe,' I thought.  'I'll have more luck at his house.'_

_"Daddy?" I called to him as he was leaning over some papers in his office._

_"Jamie," he smiled.  "You about ready to head on over there?"_

_"Yes, I think I am."  I had packed my bag for the next day….my wedding day.  My dress was already at Landon's house as well as my shoes.  Next to the entrance way was a suitcase with my clothes for the week.  Landon and I thought it best if we stayed in town at a hotel instead of going away on a traditional honeymoon.  _

_"Well then…"  My father stood up from his desk and came around to me.  "I guess my little girl's not so little anymore," he choked out._

_"Oh daddy," I threw my arms around him.  "I'll always be your little girl."_

_Walking out of my house that night stirred up a wide range of emotions within me.  I was happy, sad, scared, excited, nervous…. The next time I walked back in here I would be Mrs. Landon Carter.  My heart jumped for joy within my chest.  'Mrs. Landon Carter,' I sighed.  "Guess it's time to go."_

_As I closed the door behind me I felt a thrill in the thought that I was closing the door on my childhood and I was on my way to becoming a wife._

##  

**"Landon, hurry it up!  Jamie will be here any second now!  We have to get you out of here!"  My mom was hollering at me from the foot of the stairs.  I slung my second duffle bag over my shoulder and ran down the stairs as quickly as I could.  I gave my mom a kiss on the cheek before flying out the door.**

**"Bye Mom!  I'll see you tomorrow at the church!  Have fun with Jamie tonight!"**

**'I probably will never call that old room of mine home again,' I thought to myself as I headed out in my car.  'I'm sure glad we had to move all my stuff out – otherwise Mom never would've gotten me to clean it before I moved out!'  I began to think to that house just a little ways from where I was, the house that Jamie and I would call home.  Our home.  It was a thought that made me very, very happy.**

**I drove to the hotel we had booked in town, but I wasn't in any hurry to stay.  I tossed my bags into the room and waited a few minutes, then got back into my car and drove to Jamie's house.  My dad and Reverend Sullivan were already there, moving some of her clothes into their cars.**

**"So is everything going according to plan?" my dad asked me.**

**"She doesn't suspect a thing."**

**Coming soon…..**

**The Final Chapter: You Are Cordially Invited…**


	18. You Are Cordially Invited...

The Lord's Plan By: kf6tac/Brian and Jamie Sommers 

E-mail: kf6tac@yahoo.com

          Jamiesommers23@hotmail.com

Rated: P/G-13

Synopsis:  Landon and Jamie have had their first date now they must face their friends, their family and their own fears.  Written from Landon's POV by Brian (**in bold print) and Jamie's POV by Jamie (_in italics_).**

For all of you fanfic readers that supported us and gave us positive feedback…This chapter is for you.

Final Chapter:  You Are Cordially Invited… 

_"Jamie?"_

_"Yes?"  I turned around and faced Landon's mother._

_"Do you need anything?"_

_"No thank you.  I think I'll be fine, but thank you for asking."_

_"Anytime dear," she walked over to me and hugged me.  "Goodnight Jamie."_

_"Goodnight."  I walked around his room gently gliding my hands across some of his childhood memorabilia wishing he were here with me.  Wanting desperately to hear his voice.  His room looked somewhat empty compared to the last time he had shown it to me, but I knew why.  He had packed his things in order to move into mine and my father's house.   I sat on his bed's edge and looked around the rest of Landon's room.  I sighed to myself, missing him but at the same time happy to know that in less than a day he and I would be married._

_"Jamie, are you still up?" Landon's mother asked, walking into the room with phone in hand.  She handed the phone to me, whispering, "It's for you."_

**It took us most of the afternoon to move Jamie's belongings into the new house.  We took some of her furniture along with us, since a lot of it fit pretty well into the master bedroom.  My dad and I also had to wait for some movers to bring in the rest of the furniture that had been purchased for the house: sofas, a dining room table and chairs, extra beds and dressers, as well as a mix of other items.  We went out to dinner with Reverend Sullivan, and then my dad and I went to the hotel while Jamie's father went home for the night.  It was almost 11PM when I had finished getting ready for bed.**

**I flopped myself down on the bed.  The room was reserved for two people, Jamie and me… and her half of the bed felt almost unbearably empty.  'It's all right Landon--just wait until the morning.  You'll see her then.'  My self-lecture didn't work though, so I started busying myself trying to find something to keep my mind off of Jamie.**

**'Suit?  Check.  Shoes polished?  Done.  Vows?  Written and memorized.  Limousine?  Confirmed.'  I groaned, returning to the bed and turning on the television.  'Nope.  Nothing good on TV.  Am I pathetic or what?'  My eyes fell on the phone sitting on the nightstand.  'Are you seriously going to call her?  She'll think you're nuts… it's just one more day.  You don't want to freak her out, make her think you're calling because you have cold feet or anything.  But you do miss her… and maybe… just maybe she misses you the same way?'**

**"Hello?"**

**"Uh hi, mom?"**

**"Is everything alright Landon?  Did you forget something?"**

**"Yeah mom, everything is fine… I was just wondering, um, can I talk to Jamie?"**

**I thought I heard her try to hide laughter as she responded, "Sure Landon, I'll go get her."**

_"Hello."_

****

_"Hey, Jamie?"_

_"Landon?  Why are you calling me? We're not supposed to be seeing each other the day of the wedding you know and it's," I picked up the clock, "almost midnight."_

_"Well.... a phone call doesn't count as ****__seeing__ you know.  And besides... I really missed you."_

_"Technically...I suppose you're right," I ran my hand across the top of his dresser and felt the smooth surface beneath my fingers.  "Besides...I missed you too," I said softly._

_"And I figured this would be a nice way to finish off our last day as quote-unquote single people.  A lot better than a bachelor's party--in my case anyways.  You know... this will be our last phone call before we become husband and wife."_

_"Mmmmm.husband and wife.  Oh Landon.  Can you believe it?  We're going to be married in less than 24 hours."  My heart was racing at the thought._

_"Well if you had told me a couple of months ago, I would have laughed and said you were crazy.  But now?  Yeah, I can believe it.  It feels so right Jamie.  I love you so much."_

_"I love you too Landon.  So much."  I walked to his bed and sat on its edge.  "You know what I wish?"_

**"What?"**

**"I wish it was already tomorrow.  Then we would already be married."**

**"I have to admit, this whole 'can't see your bride-to-be' thing is pretty tough.  There just isn't enough stuff in this hotel room to keep my mind off of you.  Hopefully my mom did a better job than my dad."  I chuckled at that one.  We had done so much in the day that involved Jamie, there seriously was no way I could not think of her.**

_I couldn't help but giggle at Landon's comment.  He always knew how to make me laugh.  "Your mom did a great job.  She's very sweet."  There was a pause, and even though I knew someone needed to say something, all I could do was think of him._

**"What are you doing over there?"**

**"Nothing much.  I was just looking at some of your things...getting ready for bed," her voice was getting softer and softer as she spoke, "thinking of you...of our wedding night."**

I didn't know how to respond.  Our wedding night?  I knew I couldn't do anything with Jamie… I didn't want anything to happen to her.  So I just laughed, kind of nervously.  "Well let me tell ya... this bed here in the hotel is comfortable, but it would be a lot more comfortable if you were here with me."

_"Landon," I sighed.  "I can't wait to be with you.  To wake up in your arms..." To make love to you, I thought.  I just want to be with you Landon.  Just once I want us to be able to show each other how much we love we have inside._

_"I can't wait either, Jamie.  I'm so glad that God helped me to realize what was right in front of me all this time."_

_"It's funny isn't it?  We spent our whole lives together yet we had no idea we were what God had intended...no idea that God created me for you."_

_"I wish I had known sooner.  I wish that I hadn't wasted so much..."_

_"Don't Landon," I interrupted him.  "Don't be sorry.  Let's just be thankful that we have this time together.  I'm so thankful I have you." _

**"I…." The thought made me choke up.  "I know Jamie.  I promise you, from here on out there will be no more time wasted.  I want to treasure every moment with you.  I'm ... so very grateful ... for what we have."**

**"So am I.  I love you so much Landon."**

**"I love you too Jamie.... I love you so much.  Never in my life have I loved anyone or anything as much as I love you."**

**"Landon?  I have a confession to make."**

**"Yes Jamie?"**

_"Well, do you remember when I told you not to fall in love with me?"_

_"Yes."_

_"Deep down," I gulped.  "I was hoping you would." _

_"Really?  But Jamie.... I was such a jerk back then.  Why me?"_

_"I fell in love with you so long ago," I finally confessed.  "I used to tell myself over and over again that it wasn't love.  You couldn't have loved me.  Why would you?"_

**"I have to admit Jamie... I fell in love with you quite a while ago too. I just kept refusing to believe it. I kept telling myself I wasn't supposed to fall in love with you. Like that night I spent with you in the cemetery, when we first started play rehearsals. I was supposed to be hanging out with Dean and Eric. I knew if I told them where I had been... they would have thought I was crazy. And I thought I was pretty crazy too. But I just ... couldn't tear myself away."**

_"I knew you were supposed to be with them. It was all over school that day...where you three were going, but...Oh Landon. When you stayed with me that night..." I remembered the jolt of excitement that shot through my veins when I heard him call out to me that night. "When you showed up there and told me to show you the stars...I couldn't help but fall."_

**"I fell so fast and so hard Jamie, I didn't even realize it had happened until you slammed the door in my face. Everything I did after that... it was all about getting you back. I kept telling myself that it was what I would have done for anyone as nice as you... but now that I look back I realize that I did it because I wanted to win you over. I wanted to be someone who.... deserved you."**

**"Deserved me? How can you say that after the way I treated you?"**

**"Because I knew I deserved it. I shouldn't have blown you off like that, but I did. I knew you were a good person, and we're all human. What you did to me was nothing compared to the mistakes I had made. I just wanted you to love me Jamie."**

**"I did love you...I do."**

_I ran my hands under his bedspread and climbed into his bed, the bed in which he slept every night for the past eighteen years.  Turning my face into his pillow I said, "I don't know...I just...it's hard to explain.  It was like I knew there was something special about you, something different, but you never let anyone see it.  I was right.  There is something special about you.  You're one of the most amazing people I've ever known." A remnant of his scent was left on his pillows.  I inhaled deeply and sighed, "You know what?"_

_"What?"_

_"If I close my eyes I can picture you here with me.  I can smell you on your sheets and I feel like you're right here with me."_

**"You're right here with me too," I closed my eyes and imagined her beautiful face, her soft skin.  "I can feel you lying next to me.  I can hear you breathe.  It's like... I could roll over and there you'd be."__**

**"Soon Landon...soon," she said in a strangled whisper.  " I miss you."**

**"I miss you too Jamie.  Just a few more hours, right?"**

_"Oh, don't start that again," I giggled.  "You're always trying to make me feel better by telling me 'it's only a few more hours.'  Yet...they always feel like an eternity when you're not near."_

_"I know.  That kind of thinking hasn't worked too well has it?  I always feel like... a part of me is missing when I'm not with you.  You're my other half Jamie."_

_"I know the feeling.  I'm just not complete without you.  I'm not...whole."_

_"Jamie.... you're my soul mate."_

_"Oh Landon, you're my soul mate too.  You're...everything to me."  I pulled his comforter up to my chin and snuggled deeper into his bed just to feel closer to him.  "I love you so much Landon.  I can't wait to be your wife.  To spend my life with you," I suppressed a yawn._

**"Jamie, I can't wait either.  I love you with all my heart, and I just know that being your husband is going to be so fulfilling.  I just want to spend eternity with you Jamie."**

**"I want to spend eternity with you too Landon.  I'll be waiting for you," she said softly.**

**"I..." I trailed off.  I just couldn't keep my thoughts straight.  She always seemed to speak so casually about her leaving this earth, like she just accepted it.  I knew I'd have to accept it too one day, but I just couldn't.  Not today.  "Jamie," I said in a hoarse whisper, "I'm going to miss you so much.  I know you'll be waiting for me... and every step that I take in my life I will be walking toward you - my eternity."**

_"You know I used to be afraid of being lonely, of spending eternity without the person that God had intended for me to be with, but now.... now I know…it's you.  All this time, it was you," I smiled.  "And Landon, you don't have to miss me.  I'm right here.  I'm right by your side and I'll never leave you.  I promise.  I'll always be with you Landon."_

_"I know you'll be Jamie.  I'll always be able to find you if I just close my eyes... you'll be there.  And I'm glad that you're the one God chose for me."_

_"So am I.  I love you so much Landon."_

_"I love you too Jamie... I love you too."_

**There was a long silence, and I thought for a minute that the phones had cut out.   "Jamie?  You still there?"**

**"Yes.  It's just that…I …I don't what to say...I'm just sitting here aching.  I want to be with you so badly Landon.**

**"I know. I want to be with you too."**

_"Tomorrow," I said trying to convince myself that I could make it until then._

_"Yes – tomorrow and you know what comes after tomorrow?"_

_"What?"_

**"Forever," I could hear her smiling into the phone.  "Good night Jamie. I love you."**

**"Good night Landon.  I love you too."**

**I woke up next morning to the annoying buzz of the clock radio that was standard in the hotel.  On any other day I would have just swatted at it until it turned off and then gone back to sleep… but not this time.  I sat straight up in bed, looking around me and then at the time.**

**'This is it!  Landon, this is your wedding day.'  
  
**

**I could feel my heart pounding as I got up.  I took a shower, and then I grabbed my suit and piled everything into the car.  I had to meet my dad at the church to get ready.  My mom's car was already there, and so was my dad's.  I ran into my mom as I walked through the sanctuary toward the back of the building.**

**"Mom!"**

**"Landon, your father is waiting for you in the back.  And be careful where you look, your bride-to-be is already here."**

**"Thanks mom."  I gave her a kiss on the cheek and headed into the back hallway.**

**The last time I had been there was when Jamie showed me around.  The day I knew that I would marry her someday.  I could still remember the way she looked, standing in the sunlight as it streamed through the windows.**

**"Hey Landon," I was greeted by my dad as I walked down the hallway.  "I've got to get something out of my car, but then I'll be right back.  I've got my stuff in that room over there."  He pointed to the room that Jamie had showed me a few months earlier.**

**"Alright dad, I'll see you in a few."**

**I put my suit up on a hook on the wall and looked around.  The room was pretty big, definitely enough space for my dad and I to get ready.  I glanced quickly out the windows, but they had planned the church well and the groom's room was on the side facing away from the bride's chambers outside.  I looked at my watch.**

**'Just one more hour, Landon.  One hour.'**

_I stood looking out the window of the bride's room and thought back on how much my life had changed in the past few months.  Memories of Landon's beginning and mine played through my mind.  _

_We had started off as acquaintances, both of us assuming we knew the other and both of being proved wrong by the image we had built up in our minds.  To me he was always that rebellious boy with a good heart.  I've known since we were children that Landon had a heart of gold, he just needed to find out for himself and when we began running lines together…I was sure he had finally found it._

_Our fight…oh that horrid fight that tore us apart and eventually brought us together.  As I look back on our path that the Lord had laid out for us, when I look at the Lord's plan, I realize that I wouldn't change a thing._

_"Jamie?"_

_"Yes daddy," I smiled._

_"It's time."_

_I placed my arm through my father's and walked down the pathway lined with flowers that led to the church in which my parents got married, to the man I adored, to my future…my eternity._

**I could hear the people starting to enter the church from back in the room.  There was lots of talking going on, guests being social, laughter, and some tears.  I was fixing my tie up, trying to make the thin end shorter than the wide end, when my dad stuck his head in to see if I was ready yet.**

**"Landon," he said, walking to the mirror where I was standing.  "If you're going to be out on your own you _must learn how to tie your own ties."  He nudged me in the ribs as he walked over and made my tie behave._**

**I took a deep breath and blew it out again.  My dad looked at me.**

**"Hey, you ready to go?"**

**"Yeah – let's go dad."**

**We walked out to the sanctuary, and when I looked around I was surprised, almost shocked, to see how many people were there.  We still had about twenty minutes to the start of the ceremony but people were filling the pews already.  The church seemed fuller than it did on most Sunday mornings for regular services – a hard act to follow because Beaufort was a pretty religious town.  I gazed out on the crowd, and I could see lots of people from the school.  I picked out Sally, Eddie, Megan, Clay, and plenty of others.  All of my old friends were there too: Dean, Belinda, and of course Eric, who gave me two thumbs up from his seat.  Most of them were right up in front with my mom.**

**When the music Jamie and I had chosen – an instrumental of "Only Hope" – began to play, the room fell quiet.  I looked over at my mom, and then I looked up to see the double doors of the church opening.  Jamie and Reverend Sullivan stood there, arm in arm, both of them bathed by the sunlight.  Jamie looked absolutely angelic.  The white fabric of her wedding dress both caught and reflected some of the light, casting an aura around her.  They took their first steps forward… and Jamie seemed to just float down the aisle.  Her face was literally glowing from behind her veil, her beauty shining throughout the entire room.  I shuffled my feet nervously as I looked at her, my eyes meeting hers and then trailing down to her feet and back up again.**

**'Lord, I know I haven't been a perfect Christian all my life… and I don't know what I did to deserve someone this perfect but thank You.  Thank You for Jamie… for her love, her companionship… for everything.'**

**I watched, my gaze transfixed on Jamie as she and her father slowly walked down the aisle.  I couldn't take my eyes off of her.  I knew, as I watched her walking toward me, that I would never forget that day.  I would never forget the emotions I felt, the excitement of my heart racing, and most of all… I would always remember Jamie walking toward me, her love shining from her eyes.**

_As my father pushed the doors of the church open I could hear the sound of music filtering through.  With every step I took I looked around at our friends and family.  People that fought us every step of the way in our relationship were now sitting with tears of joy in their eyes supporting us during the union of our souls.  _

_Looking up towards Landon, I could feel his love radiating towards me and prayed that he could feel mine.   My heart was full of sheer bliss and I thought to myself, 'Being your wife Landon, is what I was made for.'_

_For a brief moment I could sense his nervousness, but when I arrived at the front of the aisle and handed my bouquet to Miss. Garber, I turned to him and watched as a gentle, reassuring smile lifted the corners of his mouth._

_My father began his reading as Landon and I reached out and clasped each other's hands.  "Love is always patient and kind.  It is never jealous."  _

_My heart swelled with adoration as he mouthed, 'I love you,' during my father's reading._

_"Love is not boastful…"_

_'I love you,' I mouthed back._

_"…or conceited.  It is never rude or selfish.  It does not take offense, and it is not resentful."_

_I looked at the love in his eyes and knew deep within my being that our marriage is what God had intended all along.  _

_"Love takes no pleasure in other people's sins, but delights in the truth.  It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure whatever comes," my father put his bible down and began the service.  We had discussed having a traditional service and decided that there was nothing about mine and Landon's relationship that qualified as traditional.  _

_"Marriage is a sacrament.  It's a vow taken between two people, two hearts, two souls and by taking these vows they no longer live their lives as two separate entities, but as one person, one heart and one soul."  He turned and looked at both of us and said, "Jamie and Landon asked me if they could prepare their own vows."  He looked at Landon and nodded, inviting him to begin._

**"****Jamie, before I met you I thought I was complete, but my world was empty and dark.  Something felt absent. I thought it was just a part of living here on earth.  I was wrong.  You were the light that illuminated the shadows.  Your love brought new meaning to my world and to my life.  The path we took to reach this day wasn't always easy, but I knew I could always count on you to be there for me.  Jamie, you are my inspiration, my reason for being.  When I fell, you were there to break my fall."  I smiled to myself, remembering how Jamie was the only person who saw me for more than just a rowdy teenager those first days after the incident with Clay.  "You have guided me and supported me in these past months, and I would not be the person I am today if not for your love and comfort.  Our journey together, Jamie, has only just begun, and I will be by your side always."  I thought back to when Jamie told me that her journey had only just begun, despite her leukemia.  I knew that by making my vows her journey would become mine… and I welcomed that.  "When you need a friend to lean on, I will be there.  When you need a shoulder to cry on, I will be there.  I'll be the one to hold you, to comfort you, and to love you.  I promise you this and all that I am.  I love you, and so I, Landon Rollins Carter, do solemnly swear to take Jamie Elizabeth Sullivan to be my lawfully wedded wife; to honor her and to cherish her all the days of my life." **

**Reverend Sullivan then turned towards my love, and said softly, "Jamie."**

_"Landon," I smiled nervously.  "When we decided to write our own vows I just assumed _that it would be easy to tell you how much I love you, yet for some reason I just couldn't seem to put it down into words. All week I kept wondering how do I tell you how much you mean to me, how much I love you. How do I let you know that without you in my life, all I did was survive but now that you're in it…I finally know what living is supposed to be like.  With you…I feel life. I feel wonder and beauty…Landon," I put my hand on his face and trailed it down his cheek, "I feel like I'm the center of everything."  He smiled a sad smile at me when he heard me recite the words I had said on our first date.  "Landon, you're the reason I wake up every morning, the reason I fight. With you in my life, I know that I can face anything. You give me so much strength, so much courage to face what I was so afraid to face before. You're my best friend, my world, my soul mate. You're my every waking thought, my one and only dream, the air I breathe and my life after death so I, Jamie Elizabeth Sullivan do solemnly swear to take Landon Rollins Carter to be my lawfully wedded husband; to honor him and to cherish him all the days of my life"  

We looked at each other with such sorrow at that moment for with those words, "all the days of my life," we both knew that they were few, but they were worth it.__

**"Let us bow our heads in prayer," Reverend Sullivan said.  "Heavenly Father.  You bring us here together today to celebrate the joining of two souls.  We ask that you grant them peace and everlasting love.  Lord we ask your blessing upon the symbols of holy matrimony and pray that these rings will be looked upon as gifts from the heart and a reminder of their eternal love.   In Jesus' name.  Amen."**

**After Reverend Sullivan concluded the prayer, he motioned toward me to begin the passing of the rings.  I looked to my dad, who was standing behind me with ring in hand.  I took it from him and took hold of Jamie's left hand, gently sliding the ring onto her finger.**

**"I give you this ring as a symbol of my vows and my eternal love for you."  Breaking a little from the script, I lifted Jamie's hand to my lips and placed a kiss on her knuckle, just above the ring.  I looked up into her eyes and smiled with all my love and adoration.**

**Jamie then turned to Miss Garber, who handed to her the ring that Jamie had chosen for me.  She took my hand in her soft and gentle grasp, and she slipped my ring on to my fourth finger.**

**"I give you this ring," she said to me, returning my gaze and my smile, "as a symbol of my vows and my eternal love for you."  Following my lead she lifted my hand to her lips and placed a soft kiss above my ring.**

**"By the power vested in me by the state of North Carolina," Reverend Sullivan cleared his throat and backhanded tears from his eyes.  "It is my privilege…my honor, to pronounce you husband and wife."  He turned to look at me and said, "Landon, you may kiss your bride."**

**I drew in another deep breath and turned toward Jamie.  My heart fluttered with anticipation as I lifted her face in my hands and I leaned in toward her.  Our noses rubbed softly, and my lips opened to brush against hers.  Time seemed to stand still as our lips touched, and it was like I was experiencing our first kiss all over again.  Finally, my lips closed over hers.  Even though the kiss was short and innocent, I could feel the love and passion flowing from her to me.  When we backed apart, my heart was swelling with happiness.  Jamie and I were married… just as God had intended it to be.**

_I felt his hands lift towards my face and watched his eyes as his lips drew closer to mine.  He rubbed his nose gently across mine as my hands grasped onto his elbows.  I could feel his breath mingling with mine as his open lips fluttered against my own.  Until finally…his mouth closed upon mine and we sealed our vows.  Husband and wife.  We gently eased apart and smiled into each other's faces._

_"Ladies and gentlemen," my father announced.  "May I introduce you to Mr. and Mrs. Landon and Jamie Carter."_

The End!  Thank you and goodnight….

If you'd like to read more about Jamie and Landon's summer together please read Jamie Sommers' A Perfect Summer.  Thanks for sticking with us!


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